Open Your Door
by J. Bredin
Summary: AU: set some time before Hand of Thrawn duology. Mara needs a break from her trader life, and Luke could deal with a vacation himself. Can they stand each other long enough to remain friends? Or perhaps even something more? CHAPTER 8 UPDATED.
1. Chapter 1

"**Open Your Door"**

J. Bredin

Overall rating of MA for some adult content.

Characters copyright by George Lucas, Timothy Zahn, Kevin J. Anderson etc. Basically they aren't mine, I didn't make them up and I'm certainly not getting paid for this. So just enjoy the story.

Summary: Luke and Mara have known each other now for eight years. They've been enemies, friends, and everything in-between. But what happens when Mara and Luke both decide to take a break from their own duties and spend time together on Coruscant? This is your basic AU Luke/Mara romance.

Author's notes: This is an expanded story I started writing many, many years ago and published at Club Jade under the title "Priorities." My only hope is to do Mara Jade's character justice, because for me, there is no greater character of more strength and versatility than she. Please read, enjoy, and review if you feel so inclined.

* * *

**Chapter 1**

**New Beginnings**

"Mara! . . ." Luke Skywalker followed her as she stormed into the old Imperial Palace, red strands of her untamed mane thrown about in her wake. Mara Jade was angry. And Mara was not a person you wanted angry with you. _What_, Luke thought, _did I say, do, or _not _do, this time?_

Mara's rippling Force sense radiated her frustration and she blatantly ignored Luke's pleas to halt in the corridor.

She had thought she was walking swiftly enough for him to get the simple message of 'get lost,' but apparently the Jedi was not willing to back off. Gods how she wished he would just disappear sometimes. Or that she had just killed him when she had the chance. She definitely had plenty of opportunities.

"Mara, I'm sorry!" he called again.

"Forget it, Skywalker. Just leave me alone."

She was making her way swiftly to the guest quarters of the housing facilities, intent on getting some rest before she took off the next morning on the _Fire_. Somehow she knew, though, that Luke could not just let things be the way they were.

The door to Mara's room flew open and instantaneously closed before Luke even had a chance. Defeated and anguished, he slumped against the cold barrier and sighed, trying to reach out to her through the Force. Her self shielding quickly slammed against him, creating a void so cold Luke shivered in response to the chill he felt coursing through his veins.

Luke cursed himself. He wasn't sure exactly what had just happened but he knew he was in trouble with Miss Jade now. Mara was leaving the next morning and he hated to part with her on such bad terms, but there was little he could do when she was this wound up. He knew she just needed to let her blow off some steam. Without him around.

"It's been great seeing you again, Mara." He didn't really expect Mara to hear him, or to respond back. He started walking away.

The flat tone of his voice in itself aggravated Mara and she promptly yelled in response, "Likewise!"

For a quick moment Luke felt a surge of anger engulf him. Who did she think she was to just toss him around this way? Even Jedi had feelings to hurt. It seemed to always be a game of how many buttons she could push and how long it took him to overload. But just as quickly as the wash had come, it receded. The very fact that anyone, especially Mara, could even set him off balance this way frustrated him to no end. There was never a time when his relationship to Mara was easy, but remembering when it had ever been this complicated or this volatile was preposterous. That was, of course, unless you counted the years when she had still wanted to kill him.

"Don't been so sure about using the past tense, Skywalker."

"Hah! Then why are you hiding behind a steel door?"

Silence.

"When you want to talk, Mara," he said coolly, "you know where to find me."

Mara felt Luke's presence leave the hall and she scowled as she sat down on the high backed repulsor-chair. This was getting ridiculous. The man was insufferable!

Mara had spent this past week on Coruscant, most of it with Luke. More often than not, they argued. Sometimes it was friendly banter, sometimes it was something more intense. But what made things so frustrating was that Mara didn't know why they were arguing in the first place. She wanted more than anything to be at peace with him, to be closer, but that just didn't seem possible anymore.

All too soon the silence in Mara's living quarters became deafening. She could hear the ringing in her ears getting louder and louder as she mentally ran through the events of the past hour.

'Damn it, Skywalker!' she cursed him one last time. 'You make things so difficult!'

Gathering a few things into a flight bag, she set off to the exercise rooms. Maybe some lightsaber practice would help her a little. Mara grumbled to herself, for the first time wishing that there was someone around to practice with. Leia was all right, but she was far too heated to have a 'friendly' match right now. And Skywalker . . . well she didn't even consider him.

As Mara left, she growled, "Lights; off," leaving total darkness behind her.

* * *

As Mara was leaving her quarters, Luke stormed into his apartment and growled, "Lights; on." By now the sun had long since set over the Coruscant city, leaving behind a seemingly endless sky, shining brightly with billions of stars. Stars that Luke would usually marvel under, but now only made him scowl. That's where they had been when this whole fight had started; on the roof of the Capitol Building, the formal Imperial Palace.

Ever since Luke had given Mara his father's lightsaber, they often found each other up there, remembering times long gone. It was never planned, but had come to be almost expected. There they would talk politely about nothing in particular; everything and nothing. More often than not, though, it ended in an argument.

In vain, Luke tried to calm himself, to search for the indifference inside of him once more. And eventually it came.

For the second time that night, Luke relived what had happened up on the roof. It had started friendly and casual, both finally calmed from the argument they had two days previous.

"I should have seen it coming," he mumbled to himself aloud as he thought.

The conversation had drifted to the argument the other day-which was a mistake in itself, Luke thought-and they began to bicker over who had caused it and the original problem resurfaced again.

A couple days ago, Luke and Mara had been having a 'friendly' lightsaber match, or so Mara put it, when the issue of Mara's uncompleted Jedi training came up. From there, it turned into a battle of mixed priorities and judgment of character, leaving both swelled with anger. It was, of course, Luke who apologized first, seeing as though it really was his fault, and Mara accepted.

'Tonight, though,' thought Luke, 'she was the one who started it. She was the one who brought it back up. And her priorities are out of balance. There's no reason for her not to complete her training, now. She's so close.'

Luke sighed and let the thoughts pass. There was nothing he could do about it right now. If it was one thing he had learned over the years it was to not disturb Mara when she was this angry; it would just make matters worse. And Force did he have a way at making her angry!

With a defeated sigh, he closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep. But it was in vain. Cooling off time was for Mara, but certainly not for the Jedi Master.

* * *

Sometime later Mara entered her quarters to find the holovid flashing a small indicator light at the bottom of the screen indicating she had a message. "What now?" she grumbled. It was probably flight control telling her she couldn't leave for a few more days, knowing the luck she had been having lately.

Luke Skywalker's face appeared with a pitiful, 'I'm sorry' look in his eyes. She managed to push back the temptation to turn it off, and decided to listen to what he had to say.

"Look, Mara . . . I'm sorry. Things got out of hand. I didn't mean it, really." Mara could see that he had some trouble in saying that last statement. Over the years she had learned to watch this body language very closely. The lines around his eyes creased ever so slightly. Perhaps he was sorry that she reacted as she did, but Mara found it hard to believe that he did not mean what he had said.

"It's just that I want you to finish your training; you're so strong in the Force and still have so much to learn, so much control you need to establish." She could hear the sigh that he never let out. "If you're not too angry, I hope that you'll call back. I'd hate for us to have to part on bad terms tomorrow morning." To Mara, he seemed as though he wanted to say something more, but the transmission just ended there.

With a sigh and a short grumble, Mara sat down at the comm station and keyed in for Luke's apartment. When his face appeared again, she almost flipped it back off.

"Hello, Mara," he said carefully.

"Skywalker," she nodded once.

Luke looked at her expectantly, but realized that she was waiting for him to say something. "I'm sorry," he said sincerely, letting his defenses down.

"Yeah," she looked away, refusing him the satisfaction of eye contact.

Luke's forehead creased curiously and he frowned. This was certainly not the reaction he had anticipated. He expected her to yell, or argue, or simply refuse his apology . . . to accept it even, but not this shunning that he was getting, now.

"Truly, Mara, I didn't mean it. I-"

"Yes you did," Mara said sternly, but uncharacteristically low for her. She turned to look at him, her eyes stabbing at him. "For you to go off the deep end like that you had to have meant it. And that is what hurts."

Luke froze with sudden realization. Many times he had aggravated Mara, but never before had he hurt her . . . not like this. It showed in her eyes. Maybe deep down Luke was always the person that she could count on for support. And he had put that hidden trust in check, now.

When Luke did not say anything, she smiled sadly and crossed her arms over her chest. "Jade out," she said more coolly than even Mara knew she was capable of.

Still in shock, Luke was unable to say anything until it was too late. The transmission ended and Mara's image was replaced by a vast darkness, matching the mood she had already bestowed on him.

Mara cursed Skywalker for bringing those feelings back to the surface. She had just gotten them under control and was about to go to sleep. Now she was sure she would have at least some difficulty.

After jumping in the shower mostly to clean off, but somewhat to clear her mind, Mara dressed for the night and slipped beneath the blankets of her bed. The gentle hum of the repulsors and generators surrounding her eventually lulled her to sleep, leaving behind all previous grievances and worries.

* * *

The balcony to Luke Skywalker's apartment did not hold such a spectacular view as the rooftop did, but he lay out there nonetheless, sulking. Mara was a friend. Despite all of their harsh words and feelings, they were friends. And he had hurt her. But was what he said to her really what he thought?

'No,' Luke decided. 'I just let her anger get to me and I said things I didn't mean. Well . . . NOW what do I do?'

Mara was scheduled to leave the next morning at daybreak and she obviously would not talk to him. He reached out with the Force to see if she was still awake . . . but no; she felt content and at peace, meaning only that she was asleep. The only thing he could do now was to try and contact her in the morning. She was one of few friends that Luke could depend on these days and he couldn't bear it if she left still angry at him. After all, he never knew when he would see her again. Mara's visits were so fleeting and often unannounced. He would just have to hope that he could catch her before she left the docking bay in the morning.

With a strained sigh, Luke walked back into his apartment and collapsed onto his bed, slipping into a deep, dreamless sleep.

* * *

By the time Mara had awakened the next morning, the chrono already read 0830. She had wanted to be well into hyperspace by this time. With a muffled curse, she got out of bed and began gathering the few belongings she had in the modest suite. She could feel a tingling in the back of her mind and she instantaneously knew that Luke was probing her. She ignored it, trying to believe that it meant nothing. She really was not in the mood for dealing with more of his bantha dung today.

After one more quick check, she gathered her flight bag and exited the suite. She had to make a stop to turn-in the room, and then she would be on her way to the hangar bay_. /And I better not find you there, Skywalker,/_ she warned bitterly.

It would take her a good three standard days traveling in hyperspace to rendezvous with Karrde as it was, and any further time she had to spend here was a waste as far as Mara was concerned. And this 'vacation' had been far from pleasurable. It had been Karrde's idea. And she would have to talk to him about that.

Mara grinded her teeth together thinking about how Karrde had sent her here. "You're losing your edge, Mara. Why don't you take a trip to Coruscant to clear your head." It had been more of a dismissal than a suggestion. Why in the worlds he had decided it, though, Mara would never know. It was highly uncharacteristic of him to send one of his people away just so they could simply 'clear their head.' He was either expecting her to find something here, or there was something going on there that he did not want her to find out about, which seemed highly unlikely. Ever since the time of Myrkr, Mara knew just about everything that Karrde knew, as far as business was concerned anyway. Then what in the Empire had he intended her on finding here?

The sounds coming from the hangar bay brought Mara back into reality and she quickly got her clearance before heading to the Jade's Fire.

'Good,' she thought. 'No Skywalker.' Perhaps he did get her message after all.

It was just then that she felt it again-the probe into her mind. She absolutely despised it when he did that! _/Stop that! You sorry excuse for a-/_

_/Don't go!/ _he called before she could finish her sentence. _/You have to believe me when I say I'm sorry. I didn't mean any of those things, Mara. You're a good friend and I don't want-/_

_/Get out of here, Skywalker!/_ Even through the Force Luke could hear the bitterness in her voice. _/I've got business to take care of./ _Mara started up the preflight sequence, aggravated that it would take another five to six minutes before she could lift off.

It took a few seconds, but Luke's voice finally came to her again.

_/Fine./_

It wasn't a tone of anger or annoyance, but of defeat. Luke had given up.

Mara was taken aback. Luke had given up? She wasn't sure if she was glad or depressed over the fact. Did she really want him to give up? But either way, she was certainly confused.

_/Fine,/_ she echoed, putting more sadness in her voice than she had intended.

After the preflight sequence had finished, Mara keyed in the turbolifts and lifted out of the hangar bay. To her, the flight to the outer-atmosphere had never seemed longer. For a short moment, she looked out the cockpit to the world below her. It was one large city, the whole planet-an endless mob of technology and politics. Usually it would have looked magical to Mara, but right now it simply looked like a living nightmare.

She was just keying in the last coordinates for the jump to hyperspace when a bleeping on her controls caught her attention: a ship, X-Wing class, approaching from behind. Opening the secure comm channel, she cursed into it.

"You kriffing, worm-ridden, son of a sith! What are you doing?"

The comments seemed not to faze him and he answered back, "I've had enough of this. Come back down so we can talk."

"I'm already running behind schedule," Mara argued.

"Karrde's not going to miss you if you're a few hours off," Luke countered. "Come back down . . . Please," he added more gently.

Luke felt the internal struggle going on within Mara but smiled when she reluctantly agreed. "You better make this good, Skywalker. And wipe that grin off your face."

Wisely, Luke did not respond, only turning his ship around as Mara did.

After both had landed, they met on the landing pad, neither one smiling . . . nor speaking.

"What do you want?" Mara finally asked, coldly.

"The same thing I've wanted since last night; to apologize." Luke gestured for them to begin walking off the platform and Mara reluctantly did so.

In silence, he led her to a nearby cantina already filled with chatter and alien musk at this early hour. Several tables attracted groups of Sabacc players of different races, some still dragging over from the previous evening, no doubt. This was certainly the type of place that Mara would be accustomed to, but Luke . . .

They sat down at a table to the side, Mara's eyes unyielding from his pitiful expression. For once, why couldn't she just soften up?

"Look," Luke began after the barmaid had taken their orders for drinks. "I've already said I'm sorry, and I mean it. Yes, I did go off the deep end and I don't know why, really. I'll understand if you can't complete your training . . . if you give me a good reason why," he added carefully.

Mara groaned. She should have known. "I'm needed with Karrde. I haven't the time to spend on Yavin finishing some ancient training that I have no use for. The Force serves me well with what I know right now."

"Karrde didn't seem to miss you this week, did he?"

She stared at him carefully, her lips pursed tightly together. No, he hadn't exactly missed her this week. He had, in fact, insisted that she leave. There was something there in Luke's eyes . . . and then it clicked. No, it hadn't been Karrde's idea to send her to Coruscant, or not his idea solely.

The tone in her voice when she spoke was cold and spiteful, something that Luke had not even heard when she had still wanted to kill him. "I don't like being deceived, Skywalker." Her expression was stone and unreadable. "If you had asked me to come to Coruscant you may have been surprised. The fact that you had to get Karrde to send me proves something to me." She paused, seeming to be thinking. "You're no better than the rest of them." For a long moment she just stared him in the eyes, sending chills through his spine. He visibly swallowed.

Luke wasn't entirely sure what she had meant by 'the rest of them,' but he wasn't sure that he wanted to know. It had seemed like a good idea at the time, and he truly believed that until their first fight three days into her visit. But now . . . now he regretted the decision more than he had ever regretted anything.

The only thing Luke could think of as he absently watched Mara leave was how stupid he had been.

* * *

The mottled sky turned into starlines, and finally into the brilliance that they were; stars. The trip had given Mara some time to cool down, but now as she approached the docking bay where Karrde would undoubtedly be meeting her, the rage began to boil again. It may had been Skywalker's idea, but for some absurd reason Karrde had agreed to it.

For the tenth time within the last three days Mara muttered to herself that if Skywalker had just asked her to fly to Coruscant she would have. She had secretly been wanting to see him, anyway. But for him to trick her into going just so he could persist about her uncompleted Jedi training . . .

"Men," she muttered lowly to herself, even though there was no one around to hear her.

The bay came into view and Mara keyed in the turbolifts, gently setting the Jade's Fire down. The whining of the engines came to a halt and Mara sat there while they ran through a post-flight sequence, gritting her teeth together. To the Empire with Skywalker, and Karrde for that matter. They had played her for a fool, thinking that she would not realize what had been going on-and she almost hadn't-and if there was anything that Mara Jade hated it was being fooled. She didn't know how, but she would get them back. Both of them.

'For now,' Mara thought, 'I've got to pretend like nothing happened. Besides, any hostility that gets through, Karrde will probably blame on old grudges for Skywalker, as he usually does.'

Mara snorted. Did everything in her life involve him somehow?

The entry ramp of the Jade's Fire lowered and Karrde saw a slim figure descend with her usual cat-like grace. "Mara," he greeted warmly, walking to the end of the ramp. "It's good to have you back. It's however unlike you to run off schedule." It wasn't a threat or scolding, just impending curiosity.

"I ran into a problem," she said coolly. It wasn't a lie. Skywalker was a problem, as far as Mara was concerned.

"Ah." The two turned to walk, Mara toting her flight bag. "Sorry to hear that."

'I'm sure,' she thought sardonically. "It couldn't be avoided," she said instead.

Karrde just nodded. "I'll need to brief you on everything you've missed. Much can happen in two weeks, as I'm sure you know."

"I know," she said evenly. "The sooner I can get back into the swing of the things the better."

"Indeed," agreed Karrde. "I'll give you time to rest from your flight, however. May I have anything sent to your quarters?"

"No, thank you. When would you like to meet?" Mara came to a halt as they reached the inner hallways of the ship and she turned to look at him.

"Business dinner at 1900 standard time," he said simply. Mara just nodded. That would give her about three hours.

Mara turned one way while Karrde headed in the other. She absently walked the halls, turning mechanically when she needed. Although she hated to admit it, Coruscant had been a pleasant change to the drab surroundings here. While in business there was only so much room allowed for comfort and style, she knew that, but after a while these same corridors that she saw day after day seemed to scar her mind with conformity and dreariness.

Somewhere, deep in her mind, Mara missed those days when she had still wanted to kill Skywalker; the days when she knew adventure. Ever since he had entered her life and she had become "legitimate," things had grown increasingly dull. Karrde didn't seem to miss it, but she sure did. She found herself dealing more and more with papers and records than she did in the field, and even when she was out there making a delivery, the fear of being boarded was gone, leaving behind an inevitable predictability.

Mara sighed as she punched in the code to release the locking mechanism of her door and it opened with a swoosh. It closed automatically as the lights turned on. 'It's no wonder why Karrde told me I was losing my edge. There's no place to use it.'

She threw her flight bag down on the floor, not really caring where it landed, and slumped down at her comm/information center. As expected the messages and paperwork had piled up. Mara groaned and rubbed her temples. 'Why am I still here?' she asked herself, not for the first time. She no longer liked the work she was doing, that was for sure. And that left her with two options, really. One, demand reassignment from Karrde, which was just a waste of air. Two . . . Mara scowled at her second choice. That would be her last resort, or so she told herself.

"This can wait," Mara mumbled, standing up from the station. Her flight had worn her out more than she thought and she still needed some rest before she was to meet with Karrde.

Plopping down onto her sleeping pallet, Mara slept peacefully.

* * *

"I wish you wouldn't leave so soon, Luke," Leia pleaded with her eyes.

"I know," he smiled back sadly. "But I'm needed back at Yavin." He knew he was lying, but he hoped that Leia couldn't see it. From the frown on her face, he knew that she did.

"Very well," she said solemnly. "I understand."

Luke kissed his sister gently on the forehead and then moved on to each of the kids. Jacen and Jaina, who were each eight now, seemed to be growing so fast. Luke, too, hoped that he could come back for another visit soon. "Be nice to your sister," Luke smiled and mussed the boy's hair. Jacen smiled his father's lop-sided grin and promised he would.

"You too," Luke said to Jaina. She just smiled at him.

Little Anakin who was waiting patiently smiled at his uncle. "When are you coming back, Uncle Luke?"

"Soon, I promise."

Han patted Luke on the back of the shoulder. "Come on, kid. I'll walk you to your ship." Luke nodded.

All three kids called to him as he was leaving. "Bye, Uncle Luke!"

"Bye," he smiled.

Han could hear the sigh escape from Luke as they headed down the corridor and towards the landing pad where his X-Wing was being prepped for flight. "So what really happened?" Han asked.

"Huh?"

Han grinned. "Look, kid, Kam and Tionne are far more capable of running that academy than you have us believing. Now, I of all people understand the concept of running away from your problems, but just what are you trying to run away from?"

Defensively, Luke countered, "What makes you think that I'm running away?"

Stopping in his steps, Han turned to face Luke. "I may not have that Force capability that you have, but I can still sense when my wife doesn't believe something."

Luke sighed. "She hasn't finished her training, either." He said it more to himself than he did to his brother-in-law.

"Either?" Han cocked an eyebrow. "What's this all about, Luke?"

He turned his gaze back to make eye contact. "Mara; I want her to finish her training but she's arguing that she doesn't have the time, or the desire, to finish it."

"Oh, is that it?" he asked, a little too casually. Seeing Luke frown, he added, "You can't force her into it, Luke. She's got to come to you on her own terms, right? Arguing with her isn't going to get you anywhere. Especially with her." He almost rolled his eyes; Luke stifled a chuckle.

"I know what you mean. She does have quite a temper, doesn't she?"

Han let out a laugh. "Put it this way, I don't envy you, pal."

With a smile, Luke continued to walk, Han following. "Anyway, she left four days ago, angry. The thing is, I was the one who told Karrde to send her here and she found out. And you know Mara."

Han hissed through his teeth and cocked his head slightly to the side. "Not a good idea, I imagine."

"Ah, no," Luke assured him. After a short silence, he felt he needed to explain himself. "It's been great seeing you guys again, but I just need to get back to the academy to clear my mind of everything. And if Mara ever decides to accept my apology, I think that's the first place she'd think to contact me."

"I understand, kid. Leia's the one you got to worry about."

Luke winced slightly. His sister would undoubtedly be unhappy about this. "Right," he agreed. "Han, would you-"

"No way," he said quickly. "I'm not gonna take the heat for this one. You want to explain it, you do it your own way."

With a sigh, Luke nodded. Han was right. This visit had only lasted a little over two weeks and the last week had been spent mostly with Mara. Leia had been asking Luke for months, now, to come and visit with the family. And now she would almost surely feel that he was turning his back on them in expense for his own problems. "All right. I'll contact her as soon as I get back to Yavin, then I can send a clear transmission. I just hope she's not too angry with me."

"She can fight," said Han, "but she doesn't stay mad for long."

"You should know," he mused.

Han shot him an annoyed glare. "Yeah, yeah. But the make-ups make it worth it." A lop-sided grin appeared on his face.

Luke nearly blushed. "I didn't need to hear that."

"Ah, Luke," Han let the grin fade. "When are you going to find a girl of your own? Someone has _got_ to rid that modesty from you."

"In time, buddy. In time."

Han watched the X-Wing take off, only to hear his comlink go off a second later. He picked up the device and switched it on. "Solo."

"Han, is Luke still there?" Leia's voice came across.

"No, he just took off. Why?"

"Oh, no," she sighed. "Mara just called in and was looking for him. I guess I'll tell her to try him at Yavin once he gets there."

Han grinned. So she had changed her mind, had she? "Yeah, I guess."

"Okay, I'll see you in a few."

"Wait, Leia..."

"Yes?" Han could hear the uneasiness in her voice.

Han paused for a grin and a moment of remembrance. "I love you."

Leia smiled into the comlink she was holding. "I know," and after a moment, "I love you, too."

* * *

(The previous day)

". . . and that's about it," Karrde concluded.

Dinner had been anything but pleasurable for Mara. It had consisted of her sitting there quietly, listening to Karrde drone over the business dealings that took place over the two weeks that Mara was not present for. Hardly things that she was interested in, but those that were expected of her to know.

Again she silently wondered what in the worlds she was doing here. The credits were good, she couldn't deny that, but she lacked all the passion she once knew. The free spirited-perhaps even reckless woman-was lost, replaced with this shell of pity and restlessness. No matter what it cost her, she would have to do something about it.

"Mara?" Karrde lifted an eyebrow.

"Yes?" she looked back up at him.

"Something on your mind?"

Mara bit at her inner cheek. This was it. "Maybe, yes . . . I know what you and Skywalker did."

Karrde's face stayed expressionless. "Oh?"

Mara snorted. 'Typical.' "Don't pull that with me, I know you too well," she warned. After a pause, she added, "I would like to request a leave. A long one."

"A leave?"

"I told you not to pull this with me." She glared angrily, not quite believing that she was doing this. "I want to take some time off. But I'm not going back to Yavin Four, not now anyway."

Karrde was confused. He had almost fully expected Skywalker to have convinced her otherwise. But if she wasn't going to Yavin . . . "Where will you go?"

After a pause, she responded, "Coruscant."

A crease forming in his forehead, Karrde thought. It would be contradictory of him to say no. After all, he was going to grant her leave for her Jedi training. "How long will you be needing?" He may have known she wanted a change, but he was not prepared for the answer she gave.

Without hesitation this time, she answered, "No less than three standard months."

"Three-!" Aghast, Karrde found himself unable to speak, much less protest. Mara was his best. Why in the worlds was she requesting a three month leave?

Impatiently, Mara asked, "Well are you going to give it to me or not? I'll understand if you can't, but if you cannot grant it to me I'll be forced to resign."

Karrde's mouth fell open. Resign? This was definitely not Mara speaking, it couldn't be. What in the Empire was she going to do on Coruscant. And why? "Mara, I . . ." With a defeated sigh, he slouched. "I don't want to lose you, but I won't pry." He paused. "Leave granted."

Mara nodded. She hadn't really expected him to argue, but she had to put it as politely as possible. "Thank you. Excuse me, I have some things to take care of."

Dully, she heard him ask, "When can I expect you to leave?"

Mara thought for a moment. There was much she had to do, many people she had to talk to. "As soon as I can make plans to leave. Perhaps tomorrow."

Wordlessly, Karrde nodded.

The decision finally made, Mara felt content to retire to her chambers. She had too much to do right now, but she would contact Coruscant as soon as it reached morning there.

* * *

Mara sat there for several minutes staring at the blank screen. This was by far one of the hardest things she had to do. And she didn't even know why she was doing it!

With a grumble, Mara finally keyed in for Luke Skywalker's apartment on Coruscant. When she got no answer there, she figured that perhaps he was at the Solo's apartment. As much as she didn't want to, she knew she would have to call there to find Luke. His sister of all people would know where he was.

"Organa-Solo," Leia's image appeared on the holo. "Hello, Mara. Is there something I can do for you?"

"Actually, I'm looking for your brother," she said matter-of-factly.

"He and Han left a few minutes ago for Luke's X-Wing," she said ruefully. "Hold for a moment and I'll see if I can get them on the comlink."

Mara nodded a thank you and the screen went blank. 'Great,' Mara thought. 'He's already leaving.'

After two or three minutes Leia's image flickered back on with a slight frown. "I'm sorry, Mara. Luke has already taken off. He was heading back to Yavin Four. Perhaps you could try him once he lands."

Mara frowned. "Yeah, maybe. Thank you."

Leia nodded. "My pleasure."

The transmission ended and Mara was left with a choice. She could wait the two or three or four, whatever amount of days it would take for Luke to get to Yavin to contact him, or she could just forget it. Neither option rather appealed to Mara's senses. 'But maybe . . .'

Flipping the comm-port on, she tried to remember the frequency of Luke's personal X-Wing. If she could talk to him right now she could get everything into the open and she would at least have more absolution in her decision.

Impatiently, Mara tapped her foot against the floor and bit her lower lip while she was waiting for Luke to respond. Finally, his confused response came across. "This is Skywalker."

Mara drew in a deep breath, and let it out rather loudly. "Skywalker, this is Mara Jade."

"I . . . uh, hello, Mara. What can I do for you?" So that was it; no snide remarks, no smirks of any kind, just a simple, confused greeting.

With an obvious effort, Mara managed to bite out, "I've changed my mind."

"About the academy?" he asked innocently.

"No," she growled. "I . . ." she softened her tone a little. "It's hard to explain. Your sister said you were heading back to Yavin Four?"

Confused, he responded, "Yes, I am."

She paused. "Do you have to?"

"Not really," he responded honestly. Another second later, "Why?"

Mara sighed, thinking more intently than she wanted to be. "I'm heading back to Coruscant. I'd appreciate it if you'd meet me back there."

A smile that Mara could not detect spread across Luke's face. That was the one thing Luke both cursed and praised about these comm channels; unlike holovids you could not see the person's expression. "I suppose I could. You're lucky you caught me before I made the jump. What's the travel time from there to here?"

"About three standard days," she said. "I'll see you then."

"Right. See you."

The static remained for a few more seconds before Mara closed the channel. "Well," she said to herself. "That was easier than I thought."


	2. Chapter 2

**Open Your Door**

J. Bredin

* * *

**Chapter 2**

"Unidentified shuttle, please identify yourself and your destination," a female voice broke through the silence.

Wearily, Mara responded, "This is personal shuttle Jade's Fire, requesting landing at Imperial City spaceport."

Another moment of static passed before the female voice came back across. "Jade's Fire, you are cleared for platform five-three-zero-three."

"Thank you."

The clouds parted and Imperial City came into view, a bitter-sweet smile crossing Mara Jade's lips. She was--in a sense--starting over again. For whatever reason, her life had been lagging, a feeling that did little to comfort her ever changing emotions. Regardless of the reasons, it didn't matter. Mara was hardly the type of person to sit around and wait for things to happen, she was the type to make things happen. And so she was here. Again.

She oriented her ship towards the platform and reduced her speed, keying in the repulsorlifts as she reached the platform. With a gentle hiss, the ship touched to the ground and began its post-flight sequence. Through the view port Mara was able to see Luke Skywalker approaching the ship slowly, a slight smile on his face. 'At least he doesn't look angry,' she thought casually.

Leaving the cockpit, Mara gathered a few belongings into a flight bag and then pressed the release for the landing ramp. She smiled slightly at Luke's approaching form, thinking that he never seemed to wear anything accept black these days.

"Good to see you again," he said carefully.

"Likewise." The two smiled at the remembered words.

"May I take your bag?" he offered.

At this Mara snorted. "No. Thanks, I think I can handle it."

Luke would have contradicted, but the smile still remaining on her face told him that she was just chiding. "So . . ." Luke began as they walked towards the turbolift that would bring them down into the building. "What brings you back to Coruscant?"

Her expression saddened slightly and Luke wondered if he shouldn't have asked the question. He would have tried a mind probe, but he preferred to get an answer from her before resorting to that.

"A lot," she said lowly, staring straight ahead. "Mostly I guess there's nothing keeping me with Karrde right now."

Luke nodded understandingly. "Leia has told me that you put in a request for an apartment. Will you be staying long?"

She nodded slowly, not speaking.

The turbolift door closed behind them. "I see," he said. "Well, it appears that Leia has arranged for you to have one in the Imperial Palace."

"In the Palace?!" Mara turned to face him, her face visibly radiating shock.

He shrugged. "That's what she said."

Silence fell and Mara tried not to squirm in discomfort. She could handle the fighting, the heated arguments, and even the friendly conversation, but when silence came while she was with Skywalker, something always made her skin crawl. Luckily, though, it did not take long for the turbolift to reach the bottom floor.

Forgetting that Mara probably knew the building, and the city, better than he, he began to gesture in the direction of the front doors. Mara just flashed him an amused smile, already walking in the indicated direction.

The walk to the Imperial Palace was short but very pleasurable. The dusk air was refreshing, seeming to be sending Mara into a much better mood as she absently watched the orange and lavender glow of the setting sun, dotted with the immense air traffic.

The doors to the building opened and in a mock gentlemanly gesture, Luke extended his elbow for Mara to take. With a laugh, she linked her arm with his, going as far as allowing him to "escort" her all the way to her new apartment that Leia had arranged for her.

As they walked the large corridors, arm-in-arm, in a comfortable silence this time, Luke's mind began drifting. Mara's mood had changed dramatically since he had seen her last. What could account for such change? Why was she here on Coruscant? And more importantly why had she asked Luke to stay?

Not wanting to break the silence, Luke kept his thoughts to himself. He knew Mara well; she would tell him in her own way and time. Prying too far would only aggravate her. Besides, he enjoyed the simplicity of their relationship right now, here at this moment. For the simple fact that it did not need to be defined, which seemed to be an internal battle that Luke had been constantly fighting lately.

Softly, he heard Mara say, "I know the feeling."

A bit embarrassed, Luke muttered a, "What?"

Mara smiled sweetly, a smile that Luke felt almost honored to see. She showed it so little. "Sure, Skywalker. I didn't hear anything."

All Luke could do was smile back.

This time Luke really did have to navigate as he led Mara through the corridors, directing her to an area of the building where the housing quarters were. The apartment was only one floor below Luke's, something Mara found quite odd. And really, the very fact that Mara was even staying in the building seemed odd.

"Well," Luke muttered stopping in front of an unfamiliar door. "I guess this is it."

The door opened in front of them with a swoosh and Mara took in her new surroundings that she would call home for the next three months. The main living area was spacious, self-conforming furniture and throws of various sorts scattered around and equipped with a full comm center station. Ahead there was a balcony, separated only from the apartment with a large transparisteel wall, partially covered by a rather old style drapery of some kind. Mara could see only the halo of the sun setting behind the horizon, now.

Adjoined to the main room on the right, was the food-prep unit. Also to the right, a hallway.

Breaking away from Luke, Mara ventured down the hall, noticing the 'fresher and two other doors. Shrugging, she opened the first door on the left. It was empty. "Must be a spare room," she muttered to herself. The next door would be Mara's bedroom.

She dropped her bag next to the wardrobe and storage unit and drew open the drapes of the window. It reached from floor to ceiling, and perhaps three or four meters across. Needless to say, the view was breathtaking. From this height, the city looked so peaceful and so full of life at the same time. It was gorgeous.

With a smile, Mara sat down on the edge of the bed, content with the soft give of the repulsors. An empty display case, a night-stand, a chronometer, and a dresser/storage unit were the only other things spread through the room. It was perfect.

Clearing his throat, Luke entered the bedroom. Mara turned to face him. "Everything okay?" he asked.

"Oh, it's great," she said energetically.

"Good," he smiled. "I, uh . . ." he ran a hand through his hair. "You need any other help while I'm here?"

Was it just her imagination or was Skywalker turning timid on her? "Well, I've already arranged for my stuff on the Fire to be brought here tomorrow. And I don't want to seem like I'm kicking you out, but--"

"You're kicking me out," he concluded with a smile.

"Right," she stood and shoved him playfully in the chest, causing him to take a full step backwards out into the hallway. "So scat. I've had a long flight."

He laughed and walked backwards down the hall with his hands up in an 'I surrender' gesture. "I'll come by tomorrow?"

"Sure, why not."

Suppressing a grin, Luke nodded then turned around to let himself out. "Oh!" he spun around. "I guess you can see that the lock isn't set. I assume you know how to do that?"

"Yeah, yeah," she said, half-annoyed. "Stop stalling and get out'a here, Skywalker."

"All right, all right!" With that, he left.

Alone, finally, Mara was able to collapse and truly marvel in what was now her home. "I think," said Mara to herself, "That I'm going to like it here."

- - -

The morning glow fluttered in through the window, cascading down in golden streaks across Mara's porcelain features. A loose grin spread across her face and she pulled the sheet more tightly to her, letting out something of a content sigh. Turning to face the window, she slowly let her eyes flutter open, her jade crystals taking in the sight of the early morning city.

In private moments like these Mara liked to enjoy the peace and serenity within herself. So often she had to portray a hardened, all-business image; times like this were treasures. Her eyes softened, and the hard lines on her face diminished. This Mara was soft and beautiful, an image that had not been shared with many.

After a few minutes of lying awake in her bed, Mara pushed away the covers and sat up, swinging her legs over the edge. She dangled her legs for a moment, smiling, and then stood up. The air was a bit cool, but fresh, sending small pimples up Mara's arms and legs that were virtually bare. Her sleeping shift was sleeveless, and only covering down mid-thigh. It was a sleek, black silken material, low-cut and revealing, accenting her best features. A promiscuous lifestyle she had never held, but Mara still enjoyed feeling sensual and feminine, even if it was only while she was alone.

She tied a short robe around her waist and ventured to the food-prep unit. After studying the controls for a few minutes, Mara was able to figure out how to get herself at least some hot tea. "Guess I'm eating out this morning," she mumbled to herself.

The hot mug warmed her hands and the steam filtered through her nose before she took the first sip. She wasn't necessarily a groggy morning person, but she had to admit she liked something hot and steamy in the morning.

After opening the drapes, Mara sat down on the couch that faced the window and tucked her feet underneath her, watching the air traffic pass by and the lights begin to flicker on, one by one in the nearby buildings. Out of all the places she could have decided to take her leave, Coruscant was by far the liveliest, and that's why Mara had chosen it. Or so she told herself.

From an approach in space, the planet looked to be some sparkling, orange jewel. But from down here, it looked crisp and fresh, only an occasional white cloud sparsed throughout the blue sky. It may have been loud at times, and needless to say busy, but from within the confines of her own apartment, Mara thought it was simply enchanting.

A bell sounding through the room snapped Mara out of her reverie and she set her cup down. She smoothed her hair back and made sure she was presentable, then ordered the computer to allow the visitor in.

"Good morning, Mara," Luke said brightly as he walked through the door. It closed behind him. The sight of Mara curled up in the corner of the couch, her bare legs bended beneath her, her almost strangely warm smile, and her soft face was enough to stop Luke dead in his tracks. It took more strength than he would have liked for him to regain his train of original thought.

Mara cocked an eyebrow as she watched the Jedi. "Something wrong?"

"No. I, uh," he snapped back, "I was just wondering if you'd like to accompany me to breakfast this morning."

"Sounds good, I'm starved."

As she stood, Luke was now able to see her legs in full view and her loose hair that was usually tied back. It gave her a softer image, one that Luke was not used to, but decided instantly that he liked. She wrapped her arms around herself, seeming to fight back a chill. "Just let me get dressed," she said casually.

"Sure, want me to wait for you?"

Mara shrugged, "If you want." She turned towards the hall and entered her bedroom, leaving Luke alone in the main room.

She emerged shortly thereafter wearing one of her typical jumpsuits that clung to her body like a second skin, her lightsaber attached loosely to the belt at her hips. Much a surprise to Luke, she had left her hair down. He watched the long, red-gold tresses shimmer in the sunlight as she moved and marveled at the color.

Feeling his stare, Mara became slightly self-conscious. "What?"

Luke cracked a smile. "Nothing. You ready?"

Dismissing the feeling of insecurity with a shrug, she responded with a simple, "Yeah."

The couple ushered out the door and took the turbolift to the nineteenth floor where there was a small cafe open at all hours of the planet's cycle. It was originally set up as a kitchen for after those late night senate meetings, but it had since been opened to the public, though it was still just mainly used by occupants of the Palace.

Amidst the lively chatter and soft music, Luke and Mara took seats at an empty booth near the corner, sitting opposite from each other. A holo popped up in the center of the table to take their orders. After giving the small holo their selections, it flickered and then disappeared.

Absently, Mara looked around the large hall. It was bright, but windowless, alive with chatter of what appeared to be pilots and politicians, but very few civilians. A lively tune played softly in the background, giving the early morning a good start.

She redirected her eyes back to Luke who in turn looked at her. "You come here often?" she asked impassively.

He shrugged. "Occasionally," he said just as casually. "Since I'm not on the planet very often anymore, probably not as much as I'd like to. It's nice here."

"Yes, it is."

A waiter droid came by, placing their food in front of them. Mara looked down at her plate, brushing a strand of hair away from her face. Again, that hair entranced Luke. "Skywalker," she said, "Will you stop swooning like a little school boy?"

With a smile, he replied, "Sorry."

She smiled back up at him. "Thanks, though."

After swallowing, he muttered, "Sure."

Setting all tension at ease, the meal persisted with friendly conversation, both avoiding all the serious topics. If they were able to keep this peace between them going, great; the longer the better. Luke enjoyed seeing Mara this way--light and carefree--and liked being able to talk to her as a friend, not as a student or, Force forbid, as an enemy.

Unfortunately, though, the inevitable came, and Luke was forced to ask. "Mara . . ." he said slowly, "Why are you here? I mean, I'm glad that you are and all, but . . . why?"

The perplexed and serious expression on his face told Mara that now was not the time for sarcasm. If this was ever going to be a leave worth-while she had to try and explain herself, to really open up. This, however, was a complicated thing for Mara to do.

Uncomfortably, she shifted in her seat, casting her eyes downward. "I needed a break, a change." She sighed. "I'm staying on for three months to, ah . . . reconsider my, how did you put it, priorities?" She looked up and saw that his expression had not changed. She rested her chin in her cupped hand and tapped the fingers of her other hand on the table.

"Things have been slow with Karrde," she explained further. "I'm not happy there. Maybe it took my visit here to realize that." Shrugging more to herself than to him, she continued. "So . . . I'm taking an extended vacation to 'find myself' as the younger generation might say."

"Mara Jade," Luke finally spoke up. "Do you mean to tell me that your life has become boring?"

Mara snorted in good nature. "In simple terms, yeah."

A crease formed in Luke's forehead and he paused to think. Something just didn't seem right about all of this. When he did speak, his voice was gentle and reassuring. "What is it, Mara?"

Raising her eyes to his, she smiled sadly, bringing her hands down into her lap. Sometimes she cursed the fact that Luke could read her emotions, other times she would never do without it. And it was only fair, since she could read him just as easily.

Uncomfortable as it may be, Mara truly wanted to open up to Luke. They had known each other for too long to be circling each other in battle stances all their lives. Somewhere along the line, Mara had to let her guard down.

"I'm not happy, Luke," she said softly. She had consciously used his first name, something she had only done a handful of times since knowing him. But this time it wasn't used in sarcastic berating, it was used in sincerity and desperation. "Maybe that never used to be important, but it is now. Everything that I once lived for, everything that I found exciting . . . it's just gone.

"When Karrde sent me here, I hated him for it. But as soon as I got here and began to relax and little bit . . . Despite everything I said, I really did have a good time.

"Speaking of which," she seemed to turn more regretful. "I'm sorry for leaving the way I did, saying those things. I shouldn't have--"

"Shh," Luke whispered, cutting her off. He sent soothing thoughts to her through the Force, letting her see that he really wasn't angry, that everything was all right. "I understand. But I'm the one who should be sorry, here."

In a moment of weakness, Mara found herself truly speaking what she felt. "I think that we've both spent too much time over the past eight years trying to make excuses for why we've hurt each other."

This seemed to strike Luke and he winced inwardly. They had spent far too much time apologizing, and not enough time talking honestly with each other. The reasons as to why, though, seemed to haunt him. "Yeah," he agreed. "Why do you think that is?"

Mara shrugged slightly. "I don't know. Maybe we're both too stubborn or too proud to admit when we're wrong. We're very much alike. But whatever the reason is, I wish we wouldn't because I--" she stopped speaking, trying to gather the words, and the courage, to say what she wanted perfectly. "What I mean to say, is that after all is said and done, I know that you're the one person that I can still always count on. I guess what I want to say, is that I consider you to be a good friend, regardless of what I may project at times."

The intensity and the emotion of the words being spoken were the only things that hindered the smile from creeping onto Luke's face. "I know," he said honestly. "And I think you know that I could say just the same of you."

"Thanks, Luke," she smiled, and then added, "For everything."

"You know," he pointed out, "I could get used to the sound of that."

Mara realized what he meant, but surprisingly did not feel the urge to bite out a correction. "Well it IS your name, isn't it?"

"I was beginning to wonder," he chided.

She grinned. "All right, all right, can we get out of here, now?"

Luke had already begun scooting off the bench. "Sure."

In a repeat of the previous evening, Luke mockingly extended his left arm. Mara, however, took his hand instead, interlacing her fingers with his. The gesture somewhat surprised Luke, but he smiled and squeezed her hand gently as they began walking out of the cafe.

"Where to?" he asked Mara as they continued walking aimlessly.

She sighed and swayed their arms back and forth. "Back to my apartment; I've got a lot of stuff to do today. Care to help a damsel in distress?"

He chuckled. "Sorry, but I can't quite picture you as the 'helpless female' type."

"Ohhh!" she nudged him playfully in the side. "I'm askin' you for help. You going to give it?"

"For you . . . anything."

The statement was sincere, but the new closeness she had with Luke still made her feel slightly uncomfortable. They had spent eight years circling each other only to come to the conclusion that they actually were friends. The close physical contact and the emotional openness was a dramatic change from their previous position. The compassion that passed between them now was something so completely different from anything else that Mara had ever known. Very few people in her life she considered to be true friends, and none that she felt as close with as she now did with Luke.

A few times in the past they had confided in each other, had serious conversations about life and all that came with it. Though few and far in-between, those conversations were usually long and intense--times that stuck out amongst the rest.

Mara smiled to herself, leaning a bit closer to Luke. She didn't know exactly how to define her relationship with him, or whether he could define it either, but she suddenly did not care. All she knew was that she had found a new friend, who had always been a friend. As complicated as it all was, it was just that simple.

- - -

Luke groaned as he collapsed next to Mara on the couch. He tilted his head back and closed his eyes as he brought his legs up to rest on the low lying table in front of them.

"I thought Jedi didn't get exhausted," Mara poked fun at him.

Luke snorted. "I made an exception just for you."

"I'm touched," she replied, wryly. "But thanks, Skywalker. You saved me a lot of work."

The process of getting all of the crates into the apartment had not been the problem, it was more of the unpacking process that had drained both of them. And they had only managed to unpack half of what Mara had brought with her. They had wisely done Mara's food shopping before hand, knowing that after unpacking they would be quite worn out. All in all, it had been a long day.

"My pleasure," Luke mumbled as he began to massage his forehead.

"Come here," Mara gestured for him to sit closer. She turned him so he was facing away from her and gently rubbed his temples. The tension seemed to leave his head, then follow through down to his shoulders and the rest of his body. He groaned, this time contentedly.

"Thanks."

She said, "It's the least I can do."

More at ease, Luke laid back and rested his head against Mara's shoulder. The calming sounds of her breathing and the accompanied rise and fall of her chest comforted him further. A rumbling in his stomach broke him from his peace, though.

"I'm getting hungry, how about you?"

"Yeah," she agreed. "How about we order in? I don't feel like prepping anything tonight."

Luke agreed humbly, "Good idea." He sat up, then stood slowly. "How about I go down to the cafe and bring something back up? It'll be faster."

"Yeah, fine. Just hurry, I'm starved."

"Yes, miss Jade," he bowed cordially, coming up just in time to catch the pillow that Mara had thrown at him. He smiled and tossed it back, and then left.

Mara snorted to herself. "A scoffy Jedi, just what the galaxy needs." She shook her head, rolling her eyes.

This was definitely shaping up to be an interesting three months.

- - -

"I know!" Mara exclaimed excitedly as she bolted up from the couch. "Let's stay up all night and watch old holovids. We can camp out on the floor and have ourselves a little carpet picnic!"

Luke laughed from his sitting position on the couch. "What?"

"Oh, come on, Skywalker. Lighten up."

"You're telling me to lighten up? Now I know you've lost it."

Mara smiled and kneeled down on the floor next to him, resting her arms on his knees, and then her chin on top her arms. "Come on," she urged. "It'll be fun. Just you and me. It'll give us a chance to make up for lost time."

Luke stared down at her curiously. Mara, and him, all night . . . watching holovids? It didn't seem real.

The past day had been surreal. Their revelation in the morning had given them the freedom to be close to each other, both emotionally and physically. Perhaps somewhere deep down, they were both trying to make up for a lost era of their lives. At a very young age, Mara had been taken from her home, void of almost all prior memories. She had been trained to be an assassin, and her mind twisted. Needless to say, she didn't have time for a normal childhood.

Luke, on the other hand, had lived a fairly normal life for a farm boy on the Outer Rim territories. However, when he was only eighteen, he was faced with the horrible deaths of the only family he had ever known--his Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru. A few days later, he had joined the Rebel Alliance. Ever since then, things had never been "normal" again. He wondered if they ever would be.

Well, now was his chance to be normal. "Sure," he smiled brightly.

"Good." Mara stood back up and pulled Luke up with her. "Now make yourself useful and go get us something to munch on." She pointed towards the prep unit. "I'll find something to watch. Any requests?"

He had already begun walking towards the unit. "I'm curious to see what kind of things you like, so you pick. I'll pick the next one. Deal?"

"Deal."

After a few minutes of preparation, strategically placing pillows on the floor and against the couch, spare blankets strewn about everywhere, Luke and Mara were finally ready to start the holo. Snacks of all kinds were placed in bowls and various containers between them as well as a bottle of wine and two glasses that were already filled. Bare feet were outstretched and covered warmly with thermal blankets, backs slumped comfortably against the restraints of the couch. The lights went dark and the holovid began.

The beginning was rather slow as far as Luke was concerned, but after that, the story seemed to capture his attention. The plot was intricately weaved, a combination drama, comedy, and love story. Luke wouldn't have pinned it as being part of Mara's liking, but he thought it interesting to see a more intimate side of her tastes.

Towards the middle of the holovid, Mara let her torso lean in closer to Luke. Delicately, he draped an arm around her waist and she moved the wine and bowls aside. She leaned comfortably into his chest and felt his chin rest on top of her head, his hand flat against her stomach. Her smaller, almost petite hands covered his and she smiled.

"Luke?" she said softly.

"Hmm?" he mumbled, still very much concentrated on the holo.

"Don't you think that our relationship with each other has turned out kind of strange?"

Luke smiled. "Very," he agreed. "But I like it this way." He kissed the top of her head. "Don't you?"

She grinned. "Yeah."

They remained quiet.

Mara, already seeing this holo a dozen times, began to think to herself. This was by far the most unique, wonderful relationship that she had ever had. It was something deeper than what friendship could most commonly be defined as, but not quite deep enough to go beyond that. They held each other, felt the warmth of the other's body, had spent an entire afternoon and evening together, but never stopped to think just once about why. It had somehow just felt completely natural, as if they had always done the same.

There had been a time in Mara's life when friends were unimportant. There were associates, and there were enemies, nothing else. After the incident at Mount Tantiss however, things had taken a sudden turn for Mara. Her relationships with people in general grew stronger, more significant, and with Skywalker more than the others. It hadn't necessarily grown closer or friendlier, but definitely more intense. They were either at each other's throats, or drowned out by laughter. Everything about their relationship was extreme--there were no shaded areas. And thus, why their new friendship reached the limits of friendliness, and pushed the restraints of a love affair.

The thoughts weren't meant to pass on to Luke, but from the way he stilled, Mara knew that he had heard. He inhaled a deep breath, held it, and then exhaled slowly. "What is it?" Mara asked.

"Just thinking," he replied simply.

"You mean, listening to me think."

He replied monotonously, "Something like that."

Mara fidgeted uncomfortably. "Come on, you have to agree. Nothing about us has ever been quiescent, apart or together."

"From one extreme to the other," he said, a grin threatening to break through.

"Well . . ." she said mysteriously. "I've been to one extreme at least, and we've reached pretty close to that same point with each other. However . . ." She grinned mischievously in the dark.

Luke chuckled. "Right. That would make it to the Outer Rim in less than a standard week. Luke Skywalker, Jedi Master, and Mara Jade, the former Emperor's Hand begin love affair. I can just see the headlines, now."

Mara joined in the laughter. "Could you imagine the look on your sister's face?"

"Or Karrde's," Luke pointed out with a chuckle.

"And just about anyone else with a sane mind."

By now Mara had squirmed out of Luke's arms and sat up to face him. They laughed together, poking jokes at what seemed to be an absurd future.

"No one ever said we were sane," Luke mused.

"Consider the facts; an overview of our relationship. There's no way in the Empire that we're sane!"

"No," Luke echoed.

After their laughter had subsided, Mara made the effort to back-track the holo to the point where they had left off. Neither one was very interested in it anymore, though.

Wrapped in Luke's warm embrace, Mara found the drowsiness of the day finally catch up with her. She laid back comfortably into his chest, her forehead resting against his neck, letting his deep breathing patterns lull her closer sleep.

"Luke . . .?" she half whispered.

"Hmm?"

Mara took one of Luke's hands and brought it to her lips, kissing his palm softly. His fingers curled slightly, obviously not expecting such a tender gesture from her. She wanted to say something about how much he meant to her, or what their relationship meant to her, but it seemed that any such explanation would sound ridiculous.

Mara wrapped his arm around her neck and she closed her eyes. "Nothing."

"I know," he whispered. If she intended on keeping any secrets from him, she would have to do a much better job of maintaining her Force barriers. "You're tired," he stated matter-of-factly. "Why don't you get some sleep?"

"Mmm."

With that, Mara fell asleep.

Luke stared down at Mara's sleeping form and smiled. His lips pressed gently against her forehead, lingering for only a second as he realized how completely suggestive this may have looked to anyone else. Laughing to himself, he pulled the blanket over them both and turned off the holo. With as little movement as possible, Luke laid down with Mara wrapped in his arms.

Neither woke until morning.


	3. Chapter 3

**Open Your Door **

J. Bredin

Author's Notes: Chapters 1 and 2 after many, many reviews on my own part, seem short, dull, and really should be just one long intro chapter. But as promised, here is chapter 3 with much more humor and a sense of its own personality. This chapter has taken me many agonizing weeks to prepare so be kind, and please review! I reworked the ending several times until finally settling on the version as it is now. Be forewarned this chapter is _long._

I always say this, but thank you Juli for helping me out in so many ways on this chapter. You dug me out of many holes and set the plot bunnies loose once again. I wouldn't have this sense of humor if it wasn't for you.

The song lyrics written later in this chapter are NOT mine, I did not write them and do not take credit for the lyrics. They are translated lyrics from a Swedish love song, "Öppna Din Dörr" by Tommy Nilsson. Literally translated would be "Open Your Door." If you happen to be Swedish and happen to know the song, you may understand why it fits in so perfectly where it is and why I chose it for the title of this story.

Enjoy!

* * *

Chapter 3 

A vague sense of awareness came into perception as Mara stirred in Luke's arms. His initial reaction was 'Oh, gods, what did I do?' until the recollection of the previous evening came to him piece-by-piece. Letting out a breath, he closed his eyes and tried to rid the rest of the sleep from his body.

Once fully aware, he delicately released himself from under Mara's arms, laying her gently against the floor. He tucked a pillow underneath her head and she cradled to it in her sleep. Smiling, he stroked the hair away from her face.

Somehow he knew that this was not a side to Mara that was often seen. She was a very beautiful woman, and--Luke realized--probably very voracious when it came to sex, but the more genteel, delicate side that he saw to her now, he knew was something very special.

Thinking along those lines brought reality back to Luke. The revelations and the obstacles that they had both overcome the previous day were nothing less than phenomenal. They were so open, so comfortable with each other. How could they have ever spent eight years taking side-swipes at each other?

It was true that neither one really meant to inflict pain, either emotionally or physically upon the other, but at times it came damn near to being that way. There were times that both he and Mara would have wanted nothing else than to take a physical blow to the other, but those were usually the times that they had hurt each other the most emotionally.

They never actually set out to hurt the other, but it happened. Life happened. No one had the effect on Luke that Mara did. Whether it was for better or for worse, she always made his life more interesting.

"That's an understatement," Luke mused softly, out loud. At times he thought he'd be better off with a vornskr. But that wasn't now. Now . . .

No words could do justice. He felt a compassion, a fondness for Mara that he had never known before. It wasn't necessarily passion, nor love, but something of a trust and content in her presence; a friendship, and a very special one at that. After all, how many friends spent the night in each others arms, literally _sleeping_ together?

One thing that Luke could not explain, though, was the close Force connection that he felt with Mara. He had always thought that he shared a special bond with Leia, but even he could not read her thoughts or emotions so strongly. Perhaps Mara just seemed to radiate them more clearly? But she could also read his just as easily.

'Then again,' Luke thought, 'She was the Emperor's Hand. That could have a lot to do with it.'

Mara stirred and pulled the blanket more closely to her chin. The sunlight reflected against the gold in her hair and shone like a halo around her seemingly innocent features. Sometimes it was hard to believe what lurked behind that beauty. Not that it was necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it was quite the opposite.

Sensing that she would be sleeping for some time still, Luke decided he would make himself useful.

The food preparation unit was simple but convenient, and since Luke had gone food shopping with Mara yesterday afternoon, he already knew what she did and did not have.

He shrugged, then ran a hand through his hair once before rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. Per Mara's suggestion, he had changed out of "that hideous black tunic" and into a simple, white button-down shirt last evening. With his black pants and tousled hair, he almost looked like Han.

He shrugged again mentally, figuring it was a sign that he was loosening up. Something that Mara had always nagged him about.

Being too preoccupied is never a good thing for a Jedi to be. And after nearly seventeen years after his first brush with the Force, Luke never thought that he _could_ be preoccupied. So when Mara snuck-up behind him, causing him to jump at her touch, he was genuinely surprised.

Mara laughed and leaned up against the countertop, crossing her arms triumphantly over her chest. The confusion on Luke's face was priceless. She smiled.

"Cute," Luke said wryly. "I don't know how you managed it, but cute."

She shrugged.

The awkwardness of the situation hit them both at the same time. The previous evening, and even the entire day, had been great, but all of a sudden it seemed as if they didn't know how to act around each other.

'I'm getting soft,' Mara thought to herself. She had cuddled up into his arms and fallen asleep for goodness' sake! She couldn't remember a time when she had ever done that. Not even when sex was involved.

The thought passed quickly when she sensed, more than saw, Luke's uncomfortable squirming. "I, uh--" he stumbled, running a hand through his hair. "Thanks for letting me crash here last night."

One corner of Mara's mouth lifted slightly. "It was fun."

He smiled at her. "Yeah."

Once the embarrassment seemed to pass, Luke and Mara returned to their own selves; the light-hearted bantering, the sarcastic comments, the playful jabbing. Mara joked about his cooking; he chided her about her morning appearance, which in all honesty he thought was spectacular. Mara grinned, hearing his silent comments, but did not say anything. If she could stay in tune with him without his knowing she was sure it could prove to be quite useful in the future.

The comm station buzzed and Mara excused herself from the table. The screen flashed for an incoming message and she sighed, keying in the new transmission. Color washed over the blackened screen and an image of Leia Organa Solo came into view.

"Hello, Mara," she said politely. "I hope your quarters are satisfactory."

The return reply was something that Leia was not prepared for. Brightly, and with surprising sincerity, Mara smiled. "Yes, it's wonderful. I must thank you for this. It really wasn't necessary, though."

Trying to hide her shock at the more than pleasant reply, Leia smiled. "It was the least I could do."

"So . . . what can I do for you this morning?"

"Actually," Leia was apprehensive, "I'm looking for Luke. I can't reach him at his apartment, and I can't get a Force link with him. He's been rather reclusive you . . ."

It took all of Mara's self control not to burst out laughing. The irony of this situation was just too great. She wondered what Organa Solo's reaction would be when she found out where Luke was. "You mean, could I try and call him through the Force?"

"Well . . . yes. I know you've always seemed to connect better with him on that level than I have."

"I can do better than that," she smirked. "Hey Skywalker!" she turned her head towards the dining table.

Leia's eyes widened as Luke stepped in front of the comm station. "Hey, Leia," he said casually, standing next to Mara. "What's up?"

Luke's appearance was somewhat questionable; his hair mussed and his clothes wrinkled. She glanced over at Mara and found the same image. She seemed to grow pale and blush at the same time. It took her a few stunned seconds before she could respond. "I, uh, if this is an inconvenient time-"

Luke tried not to laugh, but could not help it. "No, Leia, it's all right. What is it?"

Mentally shrugging, Leia continued. "It seems that Tionne has been trying to reach you but hasn't been able to get through. You were supposed to check in with her?"

"Oh! I completely forgot!" Luke cursed himself. He had promised Tionne that he would check in with her close to three days ago. He had just been too preoccupied.

Mara sent to him, _/Don't make a habit of that preoccupation, Skywalker. Never know what crazy is going to try and sneak up behind you./_

_/You said it, I didn't./_

_/Don't you insult me, Skywalker./_

With as much sarcasm as he could muster, he sent back, _/Oh, I would _never.../

The mental battle went on for some time before they turned to glare at each other, eyes blazing of fire.

Leia looked on in confusion. From the wincing and almost imperceptible body language she knew something must be going on, but she could not for the life of her figure out what. A fire burned in their eyes that reminded her of how she and Han glared at each other while they were stationed on Hoth.

"Hey you two," Leia interrupted them and they both quickly snapped to face the comm port, slightly embarrassed. She raised her eyebrows in question, mostly at Luke.

"I'll contact Tionne right away, Leia," he said simply.

"Sure. I'll talk to you later, Luke."

He nodded once. "Bye, I love you."

"Love you, too." The comm screen went blank.

There was a long moment of silence before Mara and Luke broke out into a verbal battle, more heated than their usual, playful spats. Their voices seemed to escalate as the words came more harshly and more intended to wound. . Neither one, though, would be able to pin down the flash point of the battle.

"Get out!" Mara finally screamed, shoving him in the chest so he tumbled back a step.

"What?!"

"Get out!" she shoved him again. "Get out of here and get out of my life." It crossed her mind to ignite her lightsaber, but better judgment quickly took over.

"No, Mara," he said sternly. "Not this time."

Luke caught her wrist in mid air before she could strike him again. Her eyes were ice and he matched her stare, his intense gaze unmoving as his chest heaved up and down. They stood like that for several moments--silent, infuriated, but too angry to speak.

When the rage had passed, settling instead into a hard bitterness, Luke released Mara's arm. They did not move apart, did not remove their glances; they only stood there, daring the other to say something. All the frustration, all the venom, all the spite seemed to rapidly boil to the surface, then, seeing what it had accomplished, retreated into its dull resting place in the back of their consciousness. The lines around their eyes softened and their temperaments eased at the same time, replaced now with regret and remorse.

Mara shut her eyes slowly and heaved a gentle sigh. She thanked the Force that Luke understood, and felt his arms wrap around her shoulders gently.

He sighed and whispered, "I'm sorry, Mara," into her hair.

After a moment's hesitation, she brought her arms to Luke's chest and replied wearily, "Me too."

"How do we manage to do this?" he asked, resting his forehead against hers.

"Do what?"

"Tear each other apart like this."

Mara swallowed hard and opened her eyes. The question had plagued her for months, maybe even years. No one could aggravate her the way that Luke Skywalker could, but no one else could ever comfort her the way he did. She answered the only way she knew how. "I wish I knew, Luke. I really do."

Luke had come to realize that Mara only used his first name when there was true sincerity behind her words, when she was completely overwhelmed with emotion. Now was one of those times.

"Me too," he replied. He kissed the top of her head before letting her go. "I've got to send a transmission to Tionne. Do you want me to come back later?" His eyes were hopeful.

The thought rather amused Mara. She hadn't even considered the possibility of them not spending the day together. It just felt like the natural thing to do. Her reply, though, was cool, giving no hint to her disposition. "Sure."

He grinned inwardly, knowing full well what she was thinking. Cupping her face in his hands, he kissed her softly on the forehead before leaving. She made no attempt to recoil from his touch and he smiled.

'Well, that,' Mara thought, 'was certainly interesting.'

When Luke returned, the mood was rather somber and quite thoughtful. Although they remained more or less silent with each other, their deep understanding of the other's mind allowed them to communicate more than words ever could. And they were both thankful for that.

Quietly, with her gaze turned somewhat inward, Mara stepped out onto her balcony, leaning her back and elbows up against the stone wall that served as a railing. She tilted her head back and stared up at the sky, taking in the fresh late morning air.

Luke followed her out, bowing his head as he leaned against the stone next to her. Tentatively, Luke reached out to Mara's mind, fully prepared to get slammed by those barriers she so carefully tended to. Instead, he found her more than willing to let him in.

Slowly, with a sense of care, she allowed him to see her thoughts and know what she was thinking. Her mind was not so much clouded with specific thoughts, but more of just several emotions swimming together. Realization, content, sorrow, doubt, confusion--all emotions seemed to surface at the same time.

Closing her eyes to the warm blanket of serenity Luke wrapped around her, she suddenly felt at peace with herself. She could feel the nuances of his mind as he entered hers, the unique sensation of hearing his thoughts and emotions--all his own sensations and feelings flooding her own being, becoming almost indistinguishable against hers.

The sensation was so warm and comforting that Mara found it almost too close for comfort. She opened her eyes slowly and found Luke in the same process. Tentatively, they simultaneously withdrew and began to close the connection between them, both sensing the discomfort coming from the other. That kind of contact was on a far too intimate level than either had been prepared for. Whether they would ever be prepared for it, Mara didn't know.

"That was, um," Luke trailed off, seemingly embarrassed by the new twist their friendship had taken.

"Yeah," she agreed, clearing her throat.

After a pensive moment, Luke sighed in relief. She trusted him. Finally, with no reservation, she had allowed him to really see her. She trusted him . . .

"Don't get all high and mighty on me, Skywalker." She smiled gently, her words holding no venom.

He laughed lightly in return and all he could say once the moment had sobered was a simple, "Thank you."

Slowly, she nodded, all words escaping her.

"I'm really touched that you think that highly enough of me to bestow that trust in me, Mara. Honestly."

"I know," she almost whispered.

"Come on," he gestured for her to walk back inside with him. "Do you want some caf? I'm buying." He stole a glance around Mara's new, still sparsely decorated apartment. "Maybe I could help you finish unpacking, too. That is, if you don't mind the company?"

"Sure." She sighed in relief from the break in the tense moment that had just passed between them. "I could use an extra hand. But," she halted him in his tracks and looked him up and down, "you have to change. I'm not going out in public with you looking like that." She figured that on his stop back at his apartment he would have had the common sense to change and clean up a bit, but his practicality got lost somewhere behind the idealistic thought of spending the rest of the afternoon with her.

Luke snorted. "I'm not the only one who got caught up, Jade."

Mara nearly blushed. She, too, had neglected to change out of her clothes from the previous evening. She did, however, manage to comb her hair at least.

"All right," she conceded. "I'll give you that one. Why don't we just meet up in an hour? That'll give us both time to clean up."

They both looked at the chrono. It was late morning now, a little after 1100 standard time.

"Lunch, then?" Luke asked.

"Yeah. Sure."

Luke squeezed her hand gently before leaving Mara's apartment. She gave him a faint smile, her eyes not quite meeting his own. The shyness she portrayed just did not fit her personality and Luke chuckled. She all but kicked him out of the doorway. He could hear her muttering something to herself about arrogant Jedi as he made his way down the corridor which only increased his own amusement.

He could easily get used to this routine. It had been a long time since he was simply able to enjoy life. It was rare that he and Mara were together at a time without an underlying political cause; a mission they both found themselves thrown together in. Maybe that was why they never had the chance to develop their friendship before. Yes, Mara had spent a short amount of time at the Yavin academy doing a bit of training, but she never stayed for very long. And even then Luke had still taken on the role of teacher, not as a friend. He silently cursed himself for that. He could have been friends with Mara long before, he realized, if he had just taken the time to be himself, not who everyone else expected him to be. She was obviously open to the friendship that he now offered her. Was this just the right time or had it been staring him in the face all along? He may never know.

In just a couple of minutes Luke was at his apartment. He keyed in his entry code and drifted into his sitting room with a renewed vigor. This extended vacation would be good for the both of them, he decided. They both needed a break from their ordinary lives and they could most definitely find the change they needed in the company of each other. Something within Luke stirred when he was with Mara. She made him feel real again, like the carefree youth he had been while living on Tatooine. She made him laugh, the quality most important to him at this point in his life. Here, with Mara, he could just be Luke. The Jedi Master had been left on Yavin IV, Mara would prefer it that way. And, Luke thought, so would I.

After a quick cycle in the fresher, Mara wrapped an oversized robe around herself and walked into the bedroom, fluff drying her hair with a towel. Gods her hair had grown so long! When dry it reached to the middle of her back, on the rare occasion that she actually wore it unbound. When it was wet and weighed down it reached even farther. Combing it was a task that took a good ten minutes in itself.

Tossing the wet towel into a corner of the bedroom, Mara opened her closet to browse the few outfits she had unpacked the previous day. She scowled as she ran her fingers over jump suit after jump suit in gray, black, and brown. She was getting as bad as Skywalker with his black. "Kest!" she cursed, "Where did I put it?"

Mara did not venture out often, but when she did, she made sure to always have an outfit for the occasion. Not that Skywalker was anything special to dress up for, but she did not feel like wearing a jump suit today. It was what she always wore. A reminder of her 'old' life. She was starting over again, right?

She walked over to a corner of her bedroom where unpacked boxes still lay untouched. "I know it's in here somewhere." She rummaged through box after box until her eyes glittered when she found what she had been searching for. "Perfect," she announced to no one and stood up with the garment in her hand. "Good to know I still have some feminine clothes left."

She laughed at herself as she threw the robe to the floor with the wet towel and began to dress.

The next floor up Luke was having similar trouble searching through his small wardrobe. "Black, black, black," he pushed one tunic after another aside on their hangers. "Brown?"

Luke sighed. Mara had poked fun at him for this very same dilemma just yesterday. Why was it that he owned so much black again? Was it because he liked the color? It did demand respect, but he didn't think that was why he wore it. Maybe he was just boring as Mara so often told him. He knew she didn't mean it though. She would never tolerate him for so long if he were.

Snorting at himself, he picked a deep blue tunic that had been hiding in the back of his wardrobe. He had probably only worn it once before, if that. Yes, he must have worn it at least once because he remembered Leia making a comment about the color bringing out his eyes.

Luke rid the rest of the water from his hair and threw the tunic over his body. He wore a pair of light tan trousers, the only decoration being his utility belt. The lightsaber hanging at his hip was the only sign left of the Jedi Master.

As he was in the middle of shaving, Luke heard his comm unit chiming. "What now?" he muttered. "I'm on vacation. No crisis allowed today."

With shaving cream still on a good half of his face, he walked to the unit and switched it on. He smiled when he saw his sister's soft smile.

"Hi, Luke."

"Hey, Leia," he smiled sweetly. "I'm sorry about this morning." He shuffled his feet. "That must have looked kind of bad."

She laughed a bit. "A bit, yes. What _were_ you doing in Mara Jade's apartment?"

"It's a long story. But nothing as bad as it looked, I promise."

She nodded. "I guess you're in the middle of doing something," she began, commenting the cream on his face, "but I just wanted to ask you what you're up to today. Maybe you want to come over. The kids are at school and Han and I both have the afternoon open. It would be good to spend some time together with you."

"Actually," he sounded almost regretful, "I'm having lunch with Mara in about half an hour. I've been helping her unpack and settle in."

Leia furrowed her brows. It seemed that Luke had been spending a good amount of time with Mara Jade as of late and Leia found herself actually feeling a bit jealous. Luke was hardly ever on Coruscant anymore and now he was giving all his time to Mara instead of his family.

"Hey," Luke added, smiling, "Would you and Han like to join us? Just a casual lunch at the cafe, friends hanging out with friends. You know, like the old times?"

"We wouldn't want to intrude on you—"

"Leia, it's not like that," he said lamely. "Really, Mara wouldn't mind. We're both just taking some time off from our duties. You and Han deserve the same. Come with us, it'll be fun."

The first thought that came to mind was 'this isn't my brother.' He seemed much too carefree to be the Luke Skywalker that Leia knew. The second thought was that she really did need some down time. That's what she had intended to have when she first called Luke up. Going out together would be no different than staying in together.

"As long as you don't feel we're intruding . . ."

"Great! Can you be at the café in half an hour?"

"Sure," she nodded in response. "Han and I will meet you there. See you soon."

The comm screen went black and Luke went back into the fresher to finish shaving. It didn't occur to him for another ten minutes that maybe he should warn Mara that they would have company at lunch. Hopefully, she really wouldn't mind. He didn't need another lashing out today.

He keyed in Mara's apartment and was greeted with a smirk. "What, Skywalker, couldn't wait for lunch?"

Luke smiled nervously. "Leia just called."

"Don't even try to break a lunch date with me, Skywalker. If you need to see your sister you can do it on your own time. You're on my time now."

Luke laughed, his nervousness disappearing. "No, I know better than to break a promise to you. I invited her and Han to join us." He went quiet for a moment, waiting for her to respond. When she did not, he asked "Is that ok?"

Mara regarded him with a mock annoyance. "No, it is most certainly NOT ok, Luke Skywalker. Call your only remaining blood relative and tell her that she may not join us for lunch." She smiled, uncertain if he would understand the humor in her voice. "It's fine, really. I just hope they can tolerate me through the course of the meal."

"Thanks, Mara. And don't worry about it. Leia and Han are genuine people. If they didn't like you, you'd certainly know it by now."

Her laughter was light and airy. "Right. Want me to meet you at your place?"

"Sure. Come on up when you're ready. I think I'm just about set."

"Ok. I'll be there in a few minutes."

They said their goodbyes and Luke took a quick look around his apartment. It was clean, but there was so little in the way of personal touches. What did he worry about? Mara had been there before. She knew how he lived. Kest, she had lived on Yavin herself for a little while. She knew exactly how simple of an existence that he had made for himself.

It didn't appear he had much time to think about it. Through the Force he could feel Mara's movement up the turbolift and heading down the corridor to his apartment. She would be there in less than two minutes.

He gave himself a quick once-over the mirror and nodded. 'Presentable anyway,' he thought. Maybe he was in the need of a haircut but his overall appearance was decent.

_/Getting cocky?/_ His mind buzzed with the familiar voice.

_/In my head again, Mara?/_

_/You wouldn't have it any other way, Skywalker, and you know it./_

Luke sensed her approaching outside his apartment and used the Force to key the door open. His back was to her as she walked in but he felt her familiar presence wash over him and he smiled.

"Make yourself at home," he said, shuffling through some data cards and miscellaneous trinkets on his desk. "Do you want a quick cup of caf?"

"No, I'm fine." She stared at him, waiting. "We'd better get going if we're meeting your sister."

"Not one to be fashionably late?" Luke turned away from the mess he had been busying himself with and met Mara's gaze. He tried to act unaffected by her appearance but failed miserably, judging by the smirk on her face.

"So you like it?" Mara smiled more brightly, placing her hands on her hips. The dress she wore was a beautiful garment indeed. Smooth, light weight material of a midnight blue clung to her curves and stopped just short of her knees in a mysteriously flowing manner. The sleeveless design complimented her toned arms and back, while the modest V-neck cut left enough to the imagination, yet still gave a small glimpse of cleavage. The fringes at the bodice line left a soft touch that Mara had especially purchased the dress for. It was so unlike what she wore on an every day basis. And the effect had not been lost on the modest Jedi.

"Very nice," he nodded. "Very unusual, but nice."

"I'll take that as a compliment, coming from you."

He laughed. "You should." He cocked his head in thought and asked the question that boggled his mind. "Mara, where is your blaster?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" She gave him a wry smile and a wink. "Maybe if you're well behaved at lunch, I'll tell you later. Now come on, farmboy. I hate being late."

Speechless and quite dumbfounded, Luke followed Mara out the door.

* * *

(The Solo's apartment) 

"So what did he say?" Han asked his wife after she had disengaged the comm unit.

"Well," she furrowed her eyebrows, still a bit confused, "He and Mara are having lunch down at the café in about half an hour, and he invited us to go with them." She paused and looked up at Han. "Do you want to join them?"

"Luke and Mara, huh?" He rubbed his chin, contemplating the thought. "There's an odd pairing for you. But sure, let's go." He looked a bit amused now at the thought. "You don't think they're dating or something, do you?"

"I don't know." Leia pursed her lips together. "They seem cozy with each other, but not _that_ cozy. You know what I mean?"

Han gave an infamous Corellian grin. "Sure I do, sweetheart." He bent down and kissed her sweetly on the mouth. "But it wouldn't be a surprise, you know. They've both been acting very, well . . . odd, around each other recently. They try to spend all the spare time they can with each other, but they can't even be in the same room for more than an hour without arguing. Doesn't matter what it's over, it's just always something."

Leia smiled knowingly. "It wouldn't surprise me that if when Mara starts making comments about Luke being a farmboy from a sand-ridden third-rate planet, Luke argues it being a sunny, sandy beach resort."

A bout of hearty laughter erupted. Yes. That did indeed describe it down to a tee.

"Come on, nerf herder," she urged after the laughter had subsided. "We've got a lunch date to attend."

She seemed pensive for a moment, but then smiled. Four adults who had not been allowed a normal youth were about to meet for lunch. Together, under the same roof, around the same table . . .

It would no doubt be an interesting afternoon.

* * *

By the time Luke and Mara entered the café, arm in arm, giggling like two carefree teenagers, the bright room was alive with conversation with the unique mark in the Force that was happiness. And seated near the center of the vast café, eyes fixated with an unmistakable look of confusion, were Leia and Han Solo. 

Mara was the first to notice the couple. And upon her discovery, suddenly seemed mortified. As discretely as possible, she unhooked her arm from Luke's and flashed Leia a polite smile. When Luke seemed to swallow a laugh, she jabbed him in the ribs.

"Hey guys," Han stood and smiled brightly, clapping Luke on the back once they had arrived. "How's it goin'? Good to see you again, Mara." His grin seemed to grow a little wider than Mara felt comfortable with. "You look very nice."

Mara's lip twitched slightly. She didn't wear the outfit to attract the attention of a married Corellian ex-smuggler. "Thank you," she replied politely.

Leia swatted him in the chest, a not so playful jab, but smiled nonetheless. She reached out and clasped one of Mara's hands in both her own. "It is good to see you, Mara. I'm glad you decided to take time off." She, along with everyone else, took their seats around the small table. "Everyone needs a break now and then."

"Yes," Mara replied rather thoughtfully. "Definitely."

Luke, having been quiet thus far, decided to add his two credits. "I think we all need a break. I'm thinking about taking a leave from the academy, myself."

Mara cocked her head and regarded the Jedi with a somewhat bemused look. "Oh?"

Leia also looked upon him strangely. "When did you decide this?"

"I've been thinking about it for a while," he replied steadily. "I guess seeing someone else take that leap gave me a push in the right direction."

"So you're staying here on Coruscant?" asked Han.

He nodded.

"Well," beamed Leia, "it's not exactly a vacation resort planet, but we do have some pleasantries to offer."

"You're _actually_ going to take a real vacation, Skywalker?" The amusement Mara hid well, but Luke knew better.

"Yes," he growled, "I am. I think I deserve it."

Han interrupted before they could have an all-out with each other right then. "You more than anyone, kid."

_/He's right you know./_

Luke was taken aback by the gentle nature of the voice that fluttered through his mind. He looked over his shoulder towards Mara who was smiling sheepishly.

_/I'm sorry./_

_/It's ok,/_ he responded.

Leia took note of the odd exchange between the two across the table from her. She sensed something of a buzzing through the Force but did not quite understand it. They couldn't be speaking to each other, could they? It took quite a bit of effort for her to have that kind of communication with Luke and they were blood related. But then she remembered the exchange she had witnessed earlier that morning when she had found Luke at Mara's apartment. They had definitely been communicating with each other on some sort of private channel. She would have to ask Luke about it later.

The holo that popped up in the center of the table broke the invisible tension. There was a round of drinks ordered and as a last minute thought, Leia ordered a bottle of Corellian Red. The image disappeared and Leia found herself being gazed at from all directions.

"What?"

"Since when do you drink?" The comment came in unison from all parties.

Leia laughed airily. "Never. That's the point. My brother has seen the light and is taking a vacation. I think we all deserve a little celebration."

"Leia, the last time I drank with you I was in a half-coma for nearly a day and a half," Luke grumbled.

Mara chuckled and nearly spit out the sip of water she had taken. "Skywalker can't hold his alcohol?"

"Oh, she's not much better," Han mused. "We'll just have to show these two up. Smugglers against Jedi."

"Hah," Luke and Leia spat out together.

"Jedi cockiness," Mara shook her head. "Isn't that part of the Dark Side or something?"

Luke and Leia exchanged glances, both shrugging. "Maybe."

"Ok," Han put in. "That finishing each other's sentences and using the same line is getting just a little bit spooky."

"Why?" Luke and Mara asked together, exchanging a lop-sided grin at their jinx.

"Jedi," he cursed. "I'm surrounded by them."

Mara shifted in her seat, the amusement temporarily forgotten. In a universe where everyone was placed into one category or another, she felt oddly out of place. She was neither a Jedi, nor a smuggler, even if on only a temporary basis. She held no real affiliation with the New Republic, nor the Empire. She was a woman without a home world, no family, and no real friends. Except for Luke.

Soothing thoughts were sent to her over the Force. Luke made no effort to turn towards her as he maintained his bemused expression towards the others and she thanked him silently for that. The last thing she wanted was to attract unnecessary attention from any member of the Solo family. It always seemed to prove more of a nuisance than it was worth.

_/Being a Jedi is more hassle than it's worth sometimes, too./_

The smile returned to Mara's face._ /I'll take your word for it./_

Han and Leia retreated into their own private conversation, giving Luke and Mara a little down time of their own. In what seemed like a repeat of the previous day, Mara leant down towards the table and cupped her chin in her hand, but in a more serene mood this time. She turned her head to look at Luke, the stones of her earrings dangling against her taut neck in the quick motion. The sparkling movement caught Luke's attention for a second longer than it should have and he found himself reddening when Mara raised her eyebrow questioningly.

"You do look good," Luke said hoarsely. "If I didn't say it in a halfway decent way before."

She smiled shyly. "Thank you. I figured I'd start dressing the part of a regular citizen, if I'm going to act like one."

Luke stared at her with an expression of half bewilderment, half awe. "I admire you very much, you know that? It takes a lot of courage to step down from your responsibilities the way you did. Please don't take that the wrong way," he added quickly. "I think you made the right decision and no one thinks any less of you for it. You're a very strong woman, Mara Jade. You always have been."

"That depends on your definition of strong, I guess." She sighed. "For a very long time, from my earliest memories, I remember relying very heavily and only on Palpatine. Which is why after his death I was so completely lost. After that era, I relied on only myself and the anger that drove me to hunt you down and kill you." She paused, feeling awkward at the thought after all these years. "And then after that . . . I've allowed myself to rely on no one. I've pushed myself away and refused to keep anyone too close to me, too frightened of maybe losing that someone some day. So what is strong?" she asked again. "Is it having the strength to be on your own, or having the strength to accept the need of reliance on others?"

"Somewhere in-between, I think," Luke said matter-of-factly. "But at least you recognize it now, and even understand the underlying cause. And you've taken the first steps at correcting it."

"Coruscant?"

Luke nodded slowly. "Yes. And this." Slowly, he reached over and took her free hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

Mara winced momentarily, but then gave in to the warm feeling. The implications of his statement could be taken in several ways. There were too many options and emotions to consider and Mara forced it into the back of her mind. She didn't want to think about it. Not here, and not now. All she knew was that she did feel comfortable here with him. It felt right some how.

They both became aware of the sets of eyes staring at them at the same time. There was a short battle within them both about whether to save face and break apart, or to continue their harmless closeness. After all, it was harmless, wasn't it?

"You better watch out," Han grinned widely. "The HoloNet reporters get a picture of something like that and it'll be flashed back in your faces ten fold."

"And you can bet," Leia added, nodding briskly, "that it would have plenty of juicy details about your secret love affair, too."

"What?!" Luke and Mara yelled in horror, immediately breaking any and all physical contact.

"Oh, yeah!" Han was clearly far more amused than either of them were. "You should read some of the things they write about Leia and me. It's quite a riot."

Leia snorted. "Some of it. And you didn't always think of it like that. Admit it."

"Yeah, yeah."

Their drinks came, and again, the tension seemed to have been broken. Han opened the bottle of wine and poured everyone a full glass, knowing that all present company needed to lighten up just a little. Maybe Leia had sensed it earlier and had ordered the wine for that reason. Did Jedi hunches include devious plans of drunkenness?

In a rather melodramatic gesture, Leia raised her glass and looked each member around the table in the eye, one by one. "To old friends and new, and to peace and happiness."

Everyone nodded and raised their glasses in a silent toast.

Mara took a long, biting sip of the wine. With any luck, she could get drunk in three or four glasses. Well, maybe five. This was already becoming an awkward situation.

"Good choice, Leia," she murmured over the rim of her glass, leaning pseudo-comfortably back in her seat.

"So, Mara, what made you decide on a vacation?" asked Han. "Or more importantly, merited Karrde's approval for one as long as yours?"

"That's a rather personal question," she bit back in reply, an automated defense mechanism. Instantly she regretted the statement. So many years she had spent keeping people at bay, never letting them see who she was.

Han held his hands up in front of him, palms outward. "Sorry. Didn't mean it tha—"

"No," she cut him off, slipping an apologetic tone into her voice. "I'm sorry, Solo. It's a long story. I'm not even sure entirely why I'm here. I just know that I needed to do this. As you might say, maybe it's a 'Jedi thing.' I'm getting burned out, so to speak.

"As for Karrde, I don't think I gave him much of an option. I told him he'd either have to let me go or I would have to resign."

Luke began to choke on his wine, giving Mara the satisfaction of knowing she could still shock him. She snorted in amusement.

"I'm sure he was crazy about that idea," grunted Han.

"Oh, yeah. But as I said," she took another long sip of wine, "he didn't have an option."

Leia smiled in a way that was not too often seen from her. A sly, sheepish grin. "It's good to be demanding sometimes. It keeps the men on their toes."

"Absolutely," Mara agreed. "I depend on it."

"Mara Jade; demanding?" Luke snorted. "Who would have thought?"

Underneath the table, Luke found his shin met demandingly with the thick heel of Mara's shoe.

"Ow!" he whined. "Mara . . ."

Han and Leia burst out laughing.

"You're lucky that was just your leg, Skywalker. Keep it up."

"No, that's perfectly okay."

"I like her, Luke," Han nudged his brother-in-law in the elbow. "She's got spirit."

A bright smile appeared across Mara's face. "Thanks, Solo. Glad someone appreciates it."

"I'd appreciate it more," Luke muttered under his breath, "if I didn't think it would get me killed some day."

"Relax, Skywalker. I could have killed you a long time ago if I had really wanted to."

"I know. But I think sometimes that you get some kind of strange sexual pleasure from just dragging it out over the years."

Mara winked at him and smirked. "Maybe I do."

Luke openly gaped. He had tried to catch Mara off guard but it had just been thrown right back at him. Apparently, their battles were not limited to just lightsabers and words of rage. Sexual tension had just become the new casualty to their banter.

Steeling against his nerves, he managed to form a reply, albeit a forced one. "You've got some very strange fantasies, Jade." He raised an eyebrow in what he hoped was a suggestive gesture, all the while forcing down a slight blush. "Let me know when you're ready to act them out."

"Okay, then!" interrupted Leia. "Too much information. Thanks."

The look on Mara's face was absolutely priceless. She looked mortified.

"_Any_way," Han cleared his throat. "If you two are done, I'm getting hungry."

Biting down hard on her lip, Mara resisted the comment that threatened to let itself out. Instead, she brought her wine glass to her lips and drowned down the remaining liquid, ignoring the smirk on Luke's face. This was all getting just a little _too_ friendly.

_/Can't handle it, Mara?/_

_/Just you wait, Skywalker. I'll get you back./_

_/I'll be looking forward to it./_

_- - -_

An hour and three bottles of Corellian wine later, the group began to make their departure from the afternoon crowds. Luke and Mara had made no further attempt to embarrass the other, knowing now that they were fully capable of doing so. It hardly seemed worth the effort. So when the Solo's invited them both back to their own apartment for drinks, they both agreed silently that they should quit while they were ahead. Or rather, just not that far behind.

"Are you sure?" Leia pleaded with her voice and eyes as they were all exiting the café.

"I'm sure. We'll do this again later in the week, though. If you're not too busy, that is."

"I can always make time for you, brother."

"Sorry to interrupt, guys," Mara said as she stepped in closer to Luke. "But I need to be heading back to my place. I've got a running list of things I need to do to settle in, still. Thank you for lunch, Leia." She nodded towards Han and smiled politely.

Gently, with a feather light touch, she placed her hand on Luke's arm. "I'll catch up with you later." The look on her face left no room for interpretation. She was expecting him.

He nodded once and watched her for a long moment as she walked down the corridor towards the turbolift, the fabric of her dress flowing lightly in her wake. He could feel both his sister's and Han's gaze studying him, but he didn't really care. He was tired of defending himself. He was a grown man with a right to his own private thoughts and emotions.

Picking up on Luke's mood, Leia decided to not harass her sibling about his strange behavior. She shot Han a warning look to convey the order to him as well. When Luke turned back towards them, he made no effort to amend for his temporary loss of concentration.

"I think," he said, "I'll go back to my place, too. I should talk with Tionne and some of the senior students on Yavin, let them know I've decided to stay for a while."

"All right. We'll see you soon. Love you." Leia wrapped her arms around his shoulders and gave him a tight squeeze. She sensed Luke's smile and felt instantly comforted.

"Take care of yourself, kid," Han added. "You know where we are if you need us."

"Yeah. Thanks."

The image of Mara in her blue dress casually strolling away from him was still burned into his mind as he absently walked back to the emptiness which he called his home.

And it was, Luke noted grimly, just that: empty. He took a quick look around his apartment upon arrival. He was instantly drawn to his own arrangement of holos on the wall. There were some of his family and friends, some of his students on Yavin, but the one that drew his attention was the one of him and Mara, seated next to each other at a rather long banquet table. On either side of them you could just make out the distinct features that would make up Talon Karrde and Leia Organa Solo, but only if you had known it was them there in the first place. Luke and Mara were facing each other, heads slightly inclined, laughing at a joke that had been long ago forgotten. From the look of the holo, neither one of them had noticed the shot even being taken.

And vaguely, he wondered if Mara had noticed the holo just a couple of hours earlier. If he were to be honest with himself he had forgotten almost entirely about the image. It was just one of many that he so rarely saw, seeing as though he had only visited Coruscant a handful of times in the past few years. And a good majority of those occasions had been in times of crisis when his help as a Jedi was needed. He had more important things to do at the time than to contemplate the artwork on his walls.

So much time had been lost to him . . . Oh, it had been useful to everyone else, and in turn, helpful to him in an indirect way. But as far as personal satisfaction, much of his life had been lost to him forever. That was time that he could never get back. But, he reminded himself, there was always the future to think about. Always in motion, always revolving and changing. He would just have to remain patient and let that future reveal itself to him. All in due time.

A soft, mournful twitter from the corner of the room broke Luke from his contemplations.

"Yes, Artoo," Luke responded. "I'm fine. I've been busy the past couple of days."

Another short series of quips and beeps came from the stout droid which Luke needed to assistance of his datapad converter to read. He frowned and sighed silently.

"Okay, I'll go through the messages. Thanks."

Apparently, there were still plenty of people that still wanted something from his life. He had only been out of touch for two days, not even, and the messages had already piled up. It was time to sit down in front of the comm station for a while to make replies, and to send a few messages of his own.

Unfortunately, by the time Luke had completed his task, the day had turned into early dusk. With a groan he shut down the comm unit and rubbed the weariness from his eyes. He had spoken with Tionne for some length of time, trying in vain to explain to the young woman his decision to stay on Coruscant. Finally, he had to have her put Streen on the channel and explain it to him. Streen had been very understanding and promised to keep him well informed of the on-goings of the Jedi Academy, checking in at least two or three times a week.

The rest of his time had consisted of shorter calls to various friends, both personal and those of the academy. He needed to make sure all would be taken care of in his absence. Luke hadn't even realized how heavily he really was relied upon, how much responsibility he had given to only himself. It had been quite a nuisance to hand it all off on such short notice, but hopefully it would be well worth the effort.

His body protested as he began to stand, muscles twisting and pulling with the argument that came after too many hours spent in the same position. He made his way over to his food prep station and began brewing a single cup of caf. The aroma that wafted through the air was refreshing and wonderful. With a hot mug settled into his hands, Luke walked onto the balcony and gazed out towards the mountains in the distance. The silence gave him a peace of mind that very little could.

A hideous sound came from within his apartment and Luke made a sound all too similar to a growl. "I don't care who it is, Artoo," he bit out, "I'm not picking it up. They can leave a message."

From a distant corner somewhere Artoo beeped insistently, but after Luke used to Force to slide the transparisteel door of the balcony to a grumpy close, trailed off mournfully as if in defeat. "Whatever it is can wait," he said out loud, verbally justifying himself.

Once again he stared off into the distance, sipping at his caf and leaving all his obligations behind. It was a new beginning for Luke Skywalker. He didn't know why or how, but his life was taking a new direction. The Force willed it. And who was he to argue with the will of the Force?

- - -

The blackness that followed her unanswered call forced a grimace onto Mara's face. It had been hours since she and Luke had finished lunch. Subtlety was never Luke's strong point but she thought she had at least made it clear enough earlier that morning that she did indeed want his help again this afternoon. And in expecting his presence, had done very little by herself.

"Maybe I am being unfair," she muttered. After all, he did have family and other friends on Coruscant that must also want to see him, too. He really was a very entertaining man when he took a step down from the pedestal the galaxy held him up on as the exalted Jedi Master and once again became the simple farm boy, Rogue Squadron pilot, Rebellion hero that he still was at heart.

Taking a look around, she sighed. There was packing material, empty crates, and an even higher stack of fully packed crates to be dealt with still. She couldn't be living out of storage forever. The practical side of her just wouldn't stand for it.

"Okay," she began talking to herself again. "Skywalker or not, I've got to get started. Bedroom and 'fresher first, then everything else." She pushed herself up and away from the comm unit and reached up to flip on some music. It always seemed to make any project go by faster and with less complaint.

Quickly, before she got to work, Mara threw her hair up into a tight knot and changed out of her dress a bit ruefully in exchange for a tight fitting sleeveless shirt and a pair of light weight shorts. Skywalker had missed his chance at seeing her dressed up for the time being and to kessel with him if he was going to keep her waiting.

The bedroom was, quite truthfully, a disaster area. Mara's rummaging earlier in the day had caused a storm of garments to be thrown around in every corner of the room. She let her eyes sweep over the mess, then at the empty wardrobe and she huffed at herself. Methodically she began to pick up the clothes from the floor and bed covers and place them neatly folded into the bureau drawers, the more delicate items she hung up in the wardrobe.

It was more than an hour later when Mara first looked up to check the chrono. With her meticulous organization the project was not quite yet finished. She still had a smaller crate of undergarments and sleeping shifts to sort through but her main wardrobe had been sorted through at least.

With the music blaring in the background she hadn't even heard the call trying to come through, nor did she hear Luke enter her apartment unnoticed. What was more disturbing, Mara later would realize, was that she hadn't even felt his presence approach from behind.

At a potentially embarrassing moment Luke decided to sneak up behind Mara. He had all intentions of brushing her neck or spine with his fingertips in a chilling start, but as he snuck closer to her crouching form he paused. Mara was kneeling on the floor in front of a crate as he stood watching her from behind, holding up a pair of very sensual black lace undergarments. The kind of undergarment, Luke thought with a lump in his throat, that was never intended to remain on its wearer for very long.

Even though Han and Leia were not around to keep score, Luke felt compelled to keep the scale tipped in his favor. Their little competition to catch the other off guard and to downright embarrass the other was childish and unnecessary but Force be kesseled if it wasn't fun.

He mustered up the courage and stealth necessary to close the remaining distance between himself and the red haired woman. Silently, discretely, he bent down, his lips planting a wet kiss on the back of her exposed neck. "Are you planning on modeling those for me?"

Luke should have considered himself lucky to have even have gotten the last word out. He doubled over in pain, the air rushing out of his lungs in a defeated gasp.

"I told you at lunch," she growled, "to see what happens if you keep it up."

He looked up at her, a not quite frown formed on his cringed face. "I think I may have a problem doing that now." He gritted his teeth and tried to take in a few cleansing breaths.

Despite the anger that had swelled inside of her, Mara had to see the humor in the situation and she began to almost laugh. She covered her mouth with one hand to try to hide the amusement.

"Great, Mara. Thanks." Luke grimaced and pursed his lips tightly. He was able to stand up now at least, giving him that little bit of dignity back.

"I'm sorry, Luke." She was laughing freely now. "I really didn't mean to do that. I missed."

"No," he mumbled. "You found it just fine."

"Sorry," she said again, more sincerely.

"I deserved it I guess."

She nodded, still smiling. "Where have you been, anyway?"

"I got caught up in business. And I . . . kind of forgot I promised to help you."

"Figures."

She stood in front of him, hands on her hips, a bare foot tapping in mock frustration on the carpeting. She was, Luke thought, even more beautiful in her current get-up than she had been earlier that afternoon. In a casual, dangerous sort of way. The way he preferred her.

"Well come on then," she started, either ignoring or not noticing his train of thought. "Start helping. But _I'll _finish this crate. It might excite you more than you can handle."

Luke reddened just slightly and she winked at him. So, she had caught onto this game, too.

"You," she went on, "can start in the food prep. There are plenty of plates and utensils to unpack."

"As you wish, Miss Jade." He bowed his head shallowly and scooted out of the room as a shoe hit him dead center in the rump. With a muffled yelp, he walked down the hallway and into the small food prep unit, and finding the appropriately marked crates, began opening them one by one.

"You know Mara," he yelled over the volume of the music, "for someone who spends most of her time on her ship, you sure have a lot of kriff."

Her reply came to Luke through his mind with the soft caress that uniquely marked Mara's presence in the Force. /_Stop your whining, Skywalker. And for someone who spends most of their time on one planet you have very_ little _kriff./_

_/True./_

All the storage compartments were now opened, an overwhelming sight when Luke thought about all the stuff Mara had brought with her. But within fifteen minutes Luke was pleased to see that he had gotten through the first crate. And halfway into the second, Mara joined him, humming brightly to the tune coming from the sound system.

Instead of helping, though, she leaned her back up against the countertop that separated the dining area from the prep station and crossed her arms over her chest. She grinned and watched as Luke dipped down to reemerge with a mug in each hand to place them in the compartment above head. The tight fitting trousers he wore left little to the imagination, a very appealing image to any woman, but especially for Mara. She enjoyed watching the muscles of his arms and back work together fluidly even under such ordinary, every day tasks such as these. He did have a very well kept form, she had to admit. All that long distance running and training with students no doubt helped immensely.

When Luke turned around to flash her an amused, questioning glance, she was surprised to find herself not in the least bit embarrassed or ashamed of her preoccupation. It was too late in their relationship to be embarrassed. They had saved each other from death on several occasions, had wanted to be the cause of that death on several others. For everything that they had been through together, they both deserved a bit of openness in their friendship; a chance to be completely honest. And to have fun.

"I told you, Mara. You just have to tell me when you want to try out those fantasies of yours."

"Hah!" she huffed and smiled through the irritation she was trying to portray. "You should be so lucky."

He shrugged nonchalantly. "If someone is going to get some action out of it, it may as well be me, right?"

"Typical man."

"Yeah. Well, this typical man is trying to help you out. So did you come out here to gape or to help me help you?"

"I'd like to think I can do both at the same time," she replied smugly.

Luke, too, began to smile uncontrollably. His eyes looked her up and down appreciatively, memorizing every contour and exposed piece of flesh. "Only if I can do the same."

"I suppose that's a compliment, so I'll put up with it. For a little while anyway."

In a response that was only somewhat suggestive, Luke winked and flashed a bold smirk, clearly also satisfied with the new freedom in their relationship. Just when he didn't think anyone could surprise him anymore, there was Mara, a new personality trait around every corner.

Mara as a flirt? He snorted to himself shortly and an almost-regret touched his mind as he ducked, a hand just barely gracing over his head.

"Knock it off, Skywalker. Next time I won't miss." She pursed her lips together, not quite able to frown as he only smirked. "Now let's get this over with."

- - -

Three standard hours and change later they were finished. In much of a repeat of the previous day, they both collapsed on the sofa, swinging their legs up on the table in exhaustion. This time, however, their task had been completed. The crates had even been broken down and discarded, the final remnants of her old life leaving Mara behind with no remorse. She smiled with satisfaction and closed her eyes to the music still playing faintly in the background.

"I never knew you liked music," Luke said matter-of-factly.

"Everyone likes music," she insisted. "It's just a matter of what kind and when the mood strikes you."

He shrugged lightly. "I suppose."

She glanced over at him pushing back the yawn that she felt. "Do you ever dance?"

"Only when I have to." They laughed together softly, remembering a handful of times when they had danced together at dignitary functions in the past.

"It seems like everyone expects me to be this incredibly cultured, intelligent, politically correct person just because I'm a Jedi," he mused, almost regretfully. "You know the Jedi. Does that sound like any of us to you?" he asked her.

Her face cringed as if in thought for a long moment and then she laughed. "No, not particularly."

"But I do enjoy listening to music, yes. Dancing I'm not so good at."

"Come on then," she stood up, holding out a hand to him. "I'll teach you."

He raised both eyebrows and reluctantly let her lead him to an open area of the living room. She stood there in front of him, bracing herself for what she thought would be an interesting lesson. Finally _she_ had become the teacher.

"Okay," she began, holding up his left hand in her right. "Now put your other hand around my back."

Luke's face may have reddened, but he forced the idea into the back of his mind, reminding himself that they were only dancing and the comment was not meant to be taken sexually. Thankfully the embarrassment seemed to be one sided.

Dutifully he obliged and he felt Mara's free hand rest gently on his shoulder. As if on cue, the music slowly drifted away into the next song. Soft, romantic, and incredibly hypnotic. The very kind of song that one would not dare to dance to with their best friend.

_The first time I saw you_

_And felt how you saw me_

_Everything crumbled that I knew to be true_

_And I knew you felt the same way_

_You were so beautiful, like something I never could reach_

_And the heart beats one beat for each lost day _

Slowly they began to sway together to the music, mindful of keeping a safe distance between their already too-close bodies. It was a delicate balance they had between friendship and intimacy. One step in the wrong direction would plummet them towards something neither one knew if they were ready for, or would ever be ready for.

_I forgot myself in a fantasy_

_So afraid of what you could be_

_But it was a time that I lied to myself_

_So I saw the truth in you_

_Now you stand here today with everything I ever wanted to have_

_And the heart beats one beat for each lost day_

Their eyes sought each other out carefully, too afraid to break away, too afraid to continue. They were treading on very dangerous ground; _dancing_ on very dangerous ground. There _had_ been so many lost days. For each of them personally, and even more so for them together. Each of them had heard the song before but it suddenly took on a more personal, painful meaning for them both, dancing there together in Mara's living room . . .

_Open your door and say that you want me here _

_Say that you bear only love's voice within _

_And I will open my door and give you every day again_

_Live here for the truth_

_Let me be the first to open your door_

Mara had let her eyes close at this point and her head rested gently against his shoulder. The space between them was long gone, replaced by the warmth being radiated from the other and the gentle thumping of two heartbeats. Inside her mind she could feel Luke's Force sense gently caressing but not daring to enter her most personal thoughts. He would never betray her trust that way, she knew. And maybe, she thought, he was even too afraid of what he may find there.

_So begins life, here till the end_

_We cry about what was before_

_So we fall asleep so close together_

_The day wakes everything so quickly_

_For the heaven that I have reached _

_And for everything that I now understand_

_The heart will beat one beat for each lost day_

Mara was overwhelmed with emotion that was all too alien to her but her barriers were closed up tight. She could not, would not let Luke see her so vulnerable. It was a vain attempt at seclusion, she knew, but it was all she could do to hide from him.

_Open your door and say that you want me here _

_Say that you bear only love's voice within _

_And I will open my door and give you every day again_

_Live here for the truth_

_Let me bet the first..._

_Give yourself what you want to have of me_

_And say that I'll get all those lost years_

Luke shivered involuntarily as a chill ran down his body, contrasting deeply against the warmth of the woman he was now all but holding in his arms. They were so close and yet he felt so lonely at the same time. Mara had always been there for him in his times of need and he had in turn done the same for her. But now it seemed so shallow in comparison to what it could be, what it was right now . . .

_I will open my door_

_And give you every day again_

_Live here for the truth_

_Let me be the first to open your door. . . _

The music slowly faded out, leaving long term affects in its wake. Neither one had noticed, but they had both stopped moving. Instead they were left standing in the middle of the floor, clinging to each other as if their very lives depended on it.

"Mara," he whispered, just barely audible.

_/Shh./_ She soothed him silently. _/Don't say anything to ruin it./_

He paused for a long moment but then continued with his train of thought. _/Are you afraid?/_

_/Yes./_

_/So am I,/_ he admitted.

"What are we doing, Luke?"

In response he only held her closer, fully encompassing her fragile form in a warm embrace. "I don't know," he whispered into her hair, letting out a deep breath.

Their mind barriers were locked up so tightly that the very Force seemed to be vibrating between them, standing every hair on end and sending a flood of emotion crashing into their conscious selves. They both wanted so much more from each other than they already possessed but were both too proud to admit it. And Maybe, Luke thought, both too scared to let go of the control they only thought they had over themselves. Maybe that was why it had taken them this many years to come to this point.

With her emotions still carefully shielded, Mara slowly drew her face away from Luke's chest to look up into eyes that were suddenly entirely new to her. She felt her cheeks flush as she recognized the raw passion he was trying in earnest to hide. The idea that he could possibly desire her was both exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. Somewhere in the back of her mind she wondered if she also had the same look across her own face, for she certainly felt the passion threatening to encompass her.

"I should probably go," he said softly. "Before . . ."

"Before we both do something stupid?" she asked.

Slowly, he nodded, his lips pursed closely together. 'Stupid' would not have been his choice word, but perhaps Mara was right.

"Bye, Mara." There was so much more he wanted to say to her, but the once well-spoken Jedi Master found himself tongue tied. He pushed back the urge to kiss her forehead gently, an act that he had committed many times before, but feeling that now at this stage in their relationship—relationship?—it would not be a wise idea.

Mara could not find the strength to ask him to stay. It just was not the right time. She felt him untangle himself from her limp arms and numbly she watched him walk out the door in silence. She saw the door close behind him and it felt as if a piece of her soul had just walked out with him. Somewhere in the back of her mind she screamed out for him to come back, but the message was never conveyed to him. They had both shut each other out, severing almost all Force contact for fear of revealing too much.

A chill ran up her body and she cursed him for making her feel so vulnerable. And then she cursed herself for not having the courage to stop him from leaving.

She was left alone with a hypnotic melody still echoing through her mind.

_And the heart will beat one beat for each lost day._


	4. Chapter 4

**Open Your Door**

J. Bredin

Author's Notes: Thank you everyone for the reviews! I never expected such a warm welcome to my story, although I always hoped for it. I hope this chapter hasn't been too long in coming but once you get to know me, you'll find out that I'm incredibly anal about my writing. Everything has to be perfect so I spend a LOT of time reviewing and rewriting.

Although I'd like to take credit for the ideas in this chapter solely, I cannot. Thank you to FireTigerSoul for giving me the idea to get this ball rolling again. Everyone go check out her stories here on fanfiction!

* * *

**Chapter 4**

The headache that followed Luke into consciousness the next morning was enough to force the covers over his head, blinding him from the stinging rays of sunshine entering his bedroom. The memory of the previous evening's encounter with Mara was still fresh in his mind, and no matter how much he tried to believe it was a dream, he knew it had been real.

Had he really run out on her like that? Like a teenage school boy so unsure of himself that he could barely look her in the eye? Yes, he had, and if he knew Mara like he thought he knew her, she would be steaming about right now. Whether she wished to have his affection or not did not matter. She would be fuming either way, for the simple fact that he had run away instead of facing what was happening.

"Only I could get myself into a mess like this," he mumbled to himself under the covers.

He couldn't go on hiding forever. Sooner or later he would have to confront Mara about what had happened between them. And whether that time was today, tomorrow, or a year from now it would still be just as awkward. His heart ached to reach out to her through the Force, to ask her what she was thinking, how she was feeling, but a separate part of him was too frightened of the inevitable rejection he would face. No woman could ever care for him. The end always came, an inevitability that he had accepted, albeit ruefully. Mara could not and would not care for him in that way. It would mean disaster for them, both personally and professionally. They had joked about the possibility of them as a couple, but now as it seemed more plausible than ever, the weight behind the whole scenario was heavily pushing down on Luke's shoulders. It was, in a word, a catastrophe.

"No," he whispered. "This is not happening. Not with Mara . . ."

But it was happening, in a very real sense. It wasn't a dream and it wasn't something that either of them could control. It was a living entity that drove them towards each other time and time again, forcing them to examine their feelings for one another. Feelings that had been lying dormant so long that neither knew they had even existed. Until yesterday.

Luke sighed as he thought of how Mara would take the news of hearing that she was his destiny. She would probably try to slice him in half with his own lightsaber before she would ever accept the fact that _any_thing was her 'destiny' and not in her own control, let alone the fact that it was him as the inevitable.

Then again, Mara had matured over these years and had grown to accept more of Luke's teachings of the Force. Nothing she had heard, though, had convinced her to continue with her Jedi training, much to Luke's disappointment. She had such potential. It was a topic that Luke had thought long and hard about. He never understood in the past why anyone with Force abilities would not unconditionally want to become a Jedi, but some things that Mara had said to him recently were finally beginning to make sense.

'Are you happy, Skywalker?' she had asked him once.

He had given her the most perplexed expression as he answered 'Of course I am, why?'

'Because every time I see you, you have this haunted look in your eyes, like the weight of the entire universe is resting on your shoulders.'

That had been about two weeks ago, in the middle of a typical Luke and Mara argument of why Mara had not set the time aside to train at the Yavin IV academy. Even then Luke had not completely understood the meaning of her words, but now he thought he knew. She saw what being a Jedi Master did to him, pitied him even, and certainly did not wish the same on herself. Her freedom was her most cherished possession and to become a part of the Jedi Knights now would be trading that freedom for a commitment that she was not ready to make. Much in the same way that a romantic relationship would wreak havoc over them both, he realized.

Luke ran a hand through his hair, sandy strands falling back into their defiant resting place across his vision. He blew at the strands absently and muttered under his breath. Again he thought of how desperately he was in need of a haircut.

_A likely excuse to avoid her, _a voice in the back of his mind chided him. Thoughtfully, he pursed his lips together in a thin line. He wasn't avoiding her. Mara probably would not even want to see him today. She had put up with him for several days now, surely she needed her peace of mind. After all, how much Jedi Master could one Trader handle?

With a heavy sigh he pushed the covers away from his body, temporarily recoiling from the chill against his warmed skin. It was time to begin the day--whether he was ready for it or not, it was certainly ready for him.

* * *

Luke's favorite area of Imperial City rested in the heart of its immense superstructure. Lights flashed, speeders roared, and air traffic was a swarm. But no matter the hustle, it was a place where he retreated to remember old times long gone. Times before he knew of the Rebellion and of the Force. He often shopped here, at various boutiques and merchant shops. And at this one particular plaza, he got his hair cut on a somewhat regular, not-often-enough, basis. 

"Goo' af'ernoon, gentle bein'," beamed a humanoid voice in very broken Basic.

One of the reasons why Luke frequented this place was that instead of barber droids he could interact with real beings. Now, though, taking in the scene before him, he was not too sure of himself. The humanoid before him, a race he could not place, was tall and lanky and from what he could gather, did not speak very good Basic. He couldn't offend the being though and just walk about the door.

"Good afternoon," Luke replied. "I do believe I'm in the need of a hair cut."

"Yes, yes. Come." He waved his hands frantically and ushered him into a chair.

'No mirrors in sight,' thought Luke wearily. He nonetheless took his seat and began explaining that he wanted 'only a trim.'

"Yes, yes."

With a sigh Luke relaxed and tried to push back all his misgivings. There was too much else in the galaxy to worry about than what his hair would look like.

In the background Luke could see other beings rummaging around the shop and gathering up items that he could not see. Someone pushed a cart towards the chair he was occupying and Luke furrowed his brows.

"What's that?" he asked.

"Jus' relax. Make hair sof'er." The humanoid reached for a bottle of rancid smelling solution.

"Oh," was Luke's only reply. After all, Mara might light that; soft hair. He knew he loved hers and it was incredibly silken. He closed his eyes and tried to remember the scent. But the smell of the solution being applied to his own locks completely obliterated any chance he may have had.

"Jus' relax."

"Okay," he sighed. "Okay."

Luke concentrated on relaxing, a mighty difficult task in the situation he now found himself in. Not to mention the situation with Mara developing the way it was. His heart ached for her despite his best efforts to quell the yearning. It had gone far beyond companionship last night. They had held each other for some length of time, not wanting to let go, but knowing they could go no further and so had no option. At least that was how Luke felt about it. Mara, he was not so sure about.

With his eyes closed Luke began to enjoy the feeling of his scalp being manipulated and massaged despite the less than desirable odor. It was soothing and did indeed help him relax. Perhaps he could find the courage to go face Mara today after all. He didn't particularly want to, but he knew he needed to. Things were too complicated to just be left alone. It neither to be ended or begun, but finalized in some way. He needed to know how Mara felt, one way or the other, so he could move on with his life. In one direction or the other.

Luke was so completely lost in his own musings that he had lost track of what was being done to his head. Neither did he know how much time had passed. 'How long can a hair cut take?' His head felt warm and the smell of solution stung his nostrils.

"We wash now," said the barber.

He was moved to a rinsing station and let his head be dipped into the sink and cleansed of whatever had been dumped into his hair. The cleaning solution, thankfully, was much more pleasant to the nose.

"All done, Master Skywalker," said the woman as she was drying his hair with a towel. "Try not to wash your hair for two days."

Luke raised an eyebrow. His face was recognizable on this planet so he was used to being called his name without introduction, but . . . "Okay?"

The woman smiled gently and sat him back up. "It looks good. You'd never think."

"Uh. Thanks."

She took the towel from him and led him back into the salon. Luke passed the humanoid a credit transfer card and left in silence with a feeling that he had somehow gotten much more than a haircut. What, though, he didn't know.

As he entered the air taxi he had hailed, Luke absently ran a hand through his hair and wrinkled his face. It felt soft and . . . different. "I have a bad feeling about his," he mumbled to himself.

Walking back into his apartment, Luke caught a glimpse of himself in a mirror and audibly gasped. "No. Force, no!"

- - -

As Mara was in the middle of washing her hair she felt the very familiar presence of Luke Skywalker reach out to her. He was distressed in a very _un_familiar way. She hadn't expected him to let his guard down at any point in the next few days and was quite surprised to feel his presence in her mind. Subconsciously she let down her own barriers and comforted him against whatever it was that was troubling him.

"Damn him," she cursed. Only he could make her drop her guard so easily and without reservation. Act now, think later. And later she always thought her actions were premature.

_/You gonna tell me what's wrong, Skywalker?/_

_/I need help./_

_/I know you need help,/_ she sent him with annoyance attached.

_/I'm coming down./_

_/No 'please?'/_

There was no reply and Mara cursed as she shut off the real water shower. Just when she thought she was able to relax and sort through her emotions by herself, there was Skywalker, butting his nose into her life again.

Annoyance swept over Mara Jade as she threw on the nearest clean pair of lounge pants and an undershirt. She could hear her door bell chiming and she rippled her annoyance at Skywalker through their Force bond. Whatever his problem was better be good.

She keyed open the release panel for the door and stood dumbfounded as she stared at the man at her doorframe. Her eyes widened and a scowl crossed her face.

"Help!" Luke demanded and pointed to his head frantically.

"Don't tell me," interrupted Mara. "You stuck your finger in a power socket."

"Very funny, Jade. Look at me!"

"Oh, I see you, farmboy. Get inside."

Luke obliged and began to almost whine. "Mara, what did they do to me?"

The scowl removed itself from Mara's face and she began to laugh gently and then more fiercely as she saw Luke's irritation at her musings grow. "Oh, Luke," she muttered between bouts of laughter. "You look so . . . handsome."

Luke turned around, towards a mirror he knew was there and cringed again. His hair, once long sandy locks, was now tightly curled against his head. "Mara, it isn't funny!" he insisted.

Mara's only reply was to grab her sides and sink down to the floor as the laughter engulfed her. "Oh . . . Luke. Sorry . . . I--" She looked up at him, saw he, too, was even beginning to smile, and continued laughing.

"The messes I get myself into," he sighed and sank to the floor with her.

"Oh, Gods, Luke. What _did_ you do to yourself?"

"I needed a hair cut," he replied lamely.

"You do go to extremes, don't you, Skywalker?"

He pursed his lips together. "I didn't ask for _this_." He yanked at his hair in frustration and the curls recoiled instantly back towards his scalp. "Can you fix it?"

"Oh, I don't know," she smiled wickedly. "I rather like it."

"Mara!" His emotions betrayed him as he began to chuckle. "Please?"

"Only you, Skywalker," she began, "could go into a barber shop for a haircut and come out with a permanent."

He mumbled, "A simple miscommunication."

"Right. It is shorter though." She looked into his eyes with a wicked gleam of amusement. "Sure you don't want to try it out for a while, see if it grows on you?"

"No!"

"Aww, come on, farmboy," she nudged him playfully. "I always wondered what you would look like with curly hair."

"And now you know."

She nodded joyfully. "You just made my day."

"Glad I could help." He sighed and slowly stood up, holding out his hand for Mara. Graciously she took his offered help and stood face to face with him.

"It just so happens," she said, breaking away from the intimate level of contact, "that I do have a straightening serum. I need to use it on a fairly regular basis."

Luke looked at her in confusion. "Your hair seems to be very wavy still."

"You've never seen me with my 'natural' hair," she stated matter of factly.

"Why don't you keep it curly? I think it would look beautiful."

'Uh oh,' thought Mara. 'Here we go again.'

"Why don't you keep _yours_ curly?" she asked, arching an eyebrow.

"'Cause _I_ look like a fool. Men aren't meant to have curls."

"Lando has curls," she pointed out.

"That different," he insisted. "It suits him."

Mara sighed in good nature. "Okay, Skywalker. I'll help you out. But this is the last time, okay? I'm tired of always pulling your butt out of trouble."

"Yes, ma'am."

Mara snorted. "Just let me find it. And I've got my own hair issues to handle first." She motioned towards the wet hair hanging over her shoulders and frowned just noticeably. "I was in the shower when you 'called.'"

"Oh." Luke looked down at his feet. "Sorry. I didn't think."

Mara stared at him dumbfounded. "Out of all the people on this planet that you know and are friends with, Skywalker, why did you decide to pick on me?"

"I don't know. I didn't think. I just . . . reacted, I guess."

"Mm."

Mara walked towards the 'fresher and reemerged with a flask of some sort in one hand and a hairbrush in the other. "Make yourself useful, Skywalker, and put on some caf, would you?"

"Hum?" Luke's head bolted up. "Oh, sure."

She pushed back the chuckle tickling the back of her throat and began tediously brushing out her red-gold strands.

"How did you manage this anyway?" Mara asked.

"I'm not sure," he muttered, pouring water into the brewer. "I went to my usual place but the man, humanoid or what not, apparently didn't speak very good Basic."

She snorted. "Only you, Skywalker."

"Yeah. My sentiments exactly."

Luke turned away from the kitchen towards Mara who was busying herself with her mane. He paused for a moment, hypnotized by the movements. "May I?"

"What?" she eyed him conspicuously.

He reached out a hand towards her and grabbed the brush from her apprehensive grasp. "I've always loved your hair," he commented lightly and began brushing the strands cascading down her back. "It is natural, isn't it?"

"Of course it is!" she bit out, slightly offended. "You can't bottle this color."

"No. I suppose you couldn't." He laughed softly to himself, their old camaraderie rapidly returning to them both. The caf brewer chimed twice indicating it was finished but Luke paid it no mind. Instead he began to delicately pull her hair into a taut braid, his nimble fingers manipulating as if it were second nature.

When he was finished, Mara brought a hand to her hair, patting it several times. The plait started at the top of her head and pulled the rest of her mane flush against the back of her head, the tail braided all the way down her back. "Skywalker!" she exclaimed, spinning around to meet his accomplished grin. "Where did you learn how to do that?"

He shrugged lightly. "I 'grew up' with Leia, so to speak. I mean, we did only meet when we were eighteen, but we matured together. She taught me a lot of things, including, as you can see, how to style women's long hair. There isn't a whole lot for an X-wing pilot to do on his day off on a planet like Hoth."

"Apparently not." She grinned at him like a proud parent. "It seems like I learn something new about you every day. I take it you can do more than braid?"

"I know a few things," he shrugged. "I would stare at Leia in awe as I watched her do her own hair and one day she had me try it on her. It came out disastrous. But we had a good laugh and many, many tries later it was good enough for her to wear out in public."

"I figured someone like Leia would have had a stylist of some kind," Mara said as she poured them both a mug of hot caf. "Sweetener?"

"No, thanks." He took the mug from her and leaned against the high countertop. "I think when she was growing up on Alderaan she did have attendants, being a Princess and all. But after she left that life for the Rebellion we were all pretty much on our own.

"What about you, Mara? I know Thrawn was a very cultured man but what about the Emperor? Did you have designers or stylists?"

"Sort of." She crinkled her nose as she dove into her own caf. "I had clothes made for me for certain jobs I had to take on. Jabba's palace for one instance. I still have some of them. I didn't know the designers but the garments have held up over the years and they are certainly gorgeous items."

"Was that blue dress one of them?"

"No," she shook her head. "That one I bought here on Coruscant actually. You'd recognize some of the outfits though if you saw them again."

"Maybe, but I doubt it. I never paid much attention to fashion."

"That's obvious." Mara pursed her lips together noticing for the first time that Luke had decided to don his Jedi blacks again today. "Come on, farmboy. Let's get this over with." She sighed and put her empty mug down on the countertop and indicating for Luke to do the same. "Take off your tunic."

"Huh?"

"This stuff can discolor clothing," she explained and waited impatiently for him to remove his shirt. She pulled out a towel from a storage unit in the hallway and patted a stool in the living room. "Have a seat."

"Is this stuff gonna smell just as bad as what they used to do this?" He cringed and sat down, wearing only his trousers and white undershirt.

"Don't think so." Mara draped the towel across his shoulders, taking notice of a small scar against the back of his right shoulder blade. "Where did you get this one?" She traced a fingertip absently over the indentation. It looked like it would have been a nasty gash at the time of infliction.

Luke shuddered involuntarily under her touch, trying to force the bubbling emotions and frustrations back to their resting place in the back of his mind. "I have so many scars it's hard to remember where they each came from. That one, though, came from a nasty looking wampa on Hoth that thought I would make a good dinner entrée. I didn't know you at the time so Han had to be the one to come pull my butt out of trouble."

Mara laughed. "I knew there must have been someone before me." She slipped on a pair of protective gloves and began to massage Luke's scalp with gentle caresses.

Much to his relief the tonic was very refreshing to his already frazzled senses. It reminded him of the sweet Kibo flowers on Yavin IV and he sighed as he closed his eyes, letting the feel of Mara's fingertips relax him into a trance-like state.

"Okay," Mara pulled backed away a moment later, discarding her gloves in a nearby trash compactor. "It's going to have to sit for about half an hour. If you don't mind I think I'd like to finish getting dressed, now."

Luke swiveled in his seat taking in Mara's appearance. "You like fine." It was farmboy honesty at its finest.

Mara snorted but smiled softly. "It's comfortable, but not suitable for company, let alone public." She glanced down at herself, her arms crossed over her chest, covering her thinly shielded breasts. In her mad dash to find her clothing she had foregone all undergarments. The implications and vulnerability in her state of dress were very unsettling but she tried not to let her uneasiness seep through her portrayed calm.

"You never dress down," Luke continued, oblivious to the other's thoughts. "It's good to see you relax a little bit. And you look beautiful."

"Watch it, Skywalker. That's the second time you've called me 'beautiful' today. I don't think my ego can take it."

Luke chuckled softly. "Your ego doesn't need any help."

"I'll take that as a compliment." She smiled and swatted at his chest in good nature, her stare suddenly becoming sober as she felt her smaller, more feminine hand wrapped within Luke's firm grip. She looked him in the eye, silently pleading for him to not do this right now. She was not ready and she didn't think that he was either. "Luke . . ." she whispered hoarsely.

Sighing, he let his gaze drop towards the floor. "I know." He pressed her fingertips gently to his lips. "Later."

Slowly, she nodded.

"I wish you wouldn't shut me out, though."

A moment of anguish swept over Mara and a dozen hurtful replies rushed through her mind, each instantly rejected. She did not want to hurt him anymore. She only wanted for him to understand her, and her him.

"Listen," she said, carefully thinking of how to structure her reply. She took a dangerous step in closer, her knees coming in contact with his own. "We both needed time to think about things. I'm very surprised you even showed up here today. Things are . . . complicated, and you know it. You've been shutting me out, too."

"Mara, I," he huffed and looked up into her eyes that were suddenly soft and compassionate; so much compassion that it was hard to believe she was the same Mara he had known for all these years.

Firmly, but with as much gentleness as Mara could manage, she simply said, "Later."

"Promise?"

She paused for a moment, an internal battle seeming to fight itself in her mind before finally coming to a decision. "Yes. I promise."

- - -

Some time later Mara found herself sitting on her sofa, legs crossed beneath her as she studied a datapad. She hummed softly to the tune in her head and laughed as she heard Luke Skywalker mimicking her from inside the 'fresher. The sounds of the shower muffled his voice but she heard it through their Force bond as clearly as if it were whispering in her ear. He certainly seemed joyful as of late.

_/I just told you to wash your hair, Skywalker. Don't make yourself too comfortable here./_

_/I think I like your place better than mine, Mara,/_ he sent back to her playfully. _/Do you think I can--/_

_/No./ _

_/Just for--/ _

_/No./ _

_/You used to be fun, Jade./_

Mara snorted in disgust. _/And you used to have straight hair./_ She heard his laughter audibly from down the hall.

_/I still do if this . . . stuff you put in my hair actually worked./_

A moment later their 'conversation' was severed and she no longer heard the sound of running water. The concentration it took to keep from thinking about the Jedi Master's own state of dress, or rather the lack thereof, was frightening. Mara mentally berated herself for having even the smallest of subconscious desires, reminding herself that she had no business thinking of such things. Especially when it was Luke as the desired.

With a cleansing breath she set the datapad aside, trying to clear her mind of all the emotion that was yet again beginning to swell within her. She heard the distinct sound of a door opening and felt Luke's presence approaching closer from behind. With an act she had very little control over her mind sought out that presence of its own volition and she felt her body stiffen once she realized what she had done.

"Are you decent?" she asked aloud, trying in vain to ignore the tendrils of emotion being exchanged between them.

"I'd like to think I'm a decent guy, but--"

"Skywalker," she cursed his name, spinning her head to the side to view him. "What's with you lately? This newly developed habit of yours to be cynical just isn't you."

Luke raised an eyebrow. "But it's _you_?"

He stood there in his trousers and undershirt just as he had before but his skin was now covered in a thin sheen of water droplets and his newly straightened hair was plastered straight back against his scalp. She frowned, betraying the warmth she felt when she looked at him.

"Did it work?" he asked hopefully.

She responded in a flat tone, "Looks like it."

Luke sighed in resignation, picking up his tunic. "Thanks, I guess."

Inwardly Mara groaned at herself. When would she learn to let her defenses take a break and allow herself to just be Mara when she was with him.

She stood up quickly, placing a gentle hand on his arm as he turned to leave. "Luke, I'm sorry." He seemed to stiffen momentarily at the contact, unable to meet her eyes with his own. When he did not respond she repeated, "Luke . . ."

Slowly he turned to face her, his eyes cloudy with emotion, searching out her own gaze for answers he was sure he would not obtain. "Mara, the amount of stress it gives me to be around you is phenomenal. But somehow and for some reason I keep coming back to you. Why do you think that is?"

"You're a masochist," she could not help a tiny smirk from crossing her face. "Or don't you remember?"

"Ah," Luke chuckled. "A glutton for punishment, I forgot. But I thought you were the one who got the pleasure from 'dragging me along all these years.'"

"Maybe." She grinned wickedly. "Come sit down," she said with more seriousness. "We have a lot to talk about, farmboy."


	5. Chapter 5

**Open Your Door**

J. Bredin

Author's Notes: _This Chapter is rated R for sexually related material (now if that isn't a spoiler I don't know what is). If you don't like it, just don't read it._

Thanks to "Bob" (My husband, Stefan) and FireTigerSoul for their real life bickering and always giving me a witty quote to throw in here and there. Honey, you really _are_ "farmboy" sometimes. And thank you specifically, Juli, for asking the all important question: "Blue, or grey?"

Review and let me know what you think.

* * *

**Chapter 5**

"_Come sit down," she said with more seriousness. "We have a lot to talk about, farmboy."_

There was no music in the background this time, only deafening silence as Luke took a seat next to Mara on the sofa, keeping a safe distance apart from the woman who had been torturing his every thought since they had both set foot on Coruscant.

"I don't pretend to know why you keep coming back," Mara said softly, looking more inwards than at the man she spoke to. "And I do frequently wonder why you do. Like today when you just rush here without a second thought."

"Like I said, I just reacted. There was no thought process."

"Mm." She sighed softly. "You're my best friend; you must know that by now."

Luke swallowed. He may have known such a thing to be true but to hear the words gracing Mara's lips was a song he longed to hear. "I know. You're mine, too. The one who always keeps me grounded when I start falling off into the whole hokey Jedi religion thing. You're the only one that has the courage and the sensibility to fight me when I go too far." He looked her in the eye, conveying all his gratitude towards her. "And the one who can always make me laugh, or cry, depending on your own mood."

A half crooked smile graced her full lips. "Thanks, Skywalker. But I don't know if I like having the power to wound you so deeply sometimes."

"Comes with the territory I suppose," he replied genuinely.

"But," she added with some hesitation, "What happened between us yesterday . . . I mean, _did_ anything happen between us yesterday?"

Luke had to gaze inwards in a moment of silent reflection. Would he be honest with her, fully and completely? Did he honestly believe there had been a spark between them? Would he even allow a relationship to develop if there had been one? There were so many questions to consider and only a moment of decision.

With a shyness the twin suns of Tatooine had long ago bestowed on him, Luke gazed into Mara's eyes and said softly, "Would you want there to be something there?"

Mara pursed her lips into a thin line, seemingly unaffected by his boyish charm. "That's not what I asked you."

"I know. It's not such a simple question though." He sighed. "If I say no I'm afraid of offending some notion of romance that I have no idea if you even feel or not. If I say yes, well, that opens up too many doors to count with just as many possible futures. Some of which may not be in our best interest."

"Do you always do what is in your 'best interest,' Skywalker?"

"Luke," he pleaded. "My name is Luke. Nothing fills my heart the way it does when you say my name."

She gently folded her hands in her lap and looked downwards. "I didn't think I affected you that way."

"Mara," his mouth nearly gaped open and he took one of her hands in his own. "How could you not know? No one can infuriate me the way you can. One moment I can loathe you and the other . . . well, you know what I mean."

"Luke," she almost whispered, bringing her eyes up to meet his piercing blue gaze. Her mouth went dry as she scanned over his face, pausing at his full mouth as a tongue peeked out to moisten his slightly chapped lips. "You're such a good friend," she said, still focusing on his mouth. "I don't want to lose that."

With only a vague sense of awareness they inclined towards each other, towards an uncertain future that could possibly destroy them both.

"Neither do I," he replied softly.

Closer.

"This is a bad idea," Mara whispered.

He nodded. "Very bad."

Closer.

"I don't care." Her words came out in a raspy undertone.

"Neither do I."

Their eyes locked for a single heartbeat and then like two dueling sabers coming together in a thunderous confrontation, their lips locked together in a sweet caress of forbidden pleasure.

Suddenly, with an incredible flood of emotion, Mara's subconscious barriers came crashing down and her Force sense flooded into Luke with an intensity he had never experienced before in his life; he had never even known such a thing could exist. The feeling overwhelmed him as his own shields instantaneously dropped.

The sensation was not so unfamiliar as they had both opened themselves to each other in the recent past, but this meeting of Force awareness was far more intense and intimate than anything either had previously experienced, with anyone, at any time.

For the first time in his life, with Mara Jade as his savior, Luke felt whole. And with all his heart he knew that this was a gift she would give only to him. This was what he had waited all these years for. All the pain, the suffering, the loneliness, it had all been worth it for even just this one moment of completion.

The sound of Mara's heartbeat pounding in her ears was deafening. Her entire body pulsated with pleasure and desire as she opened her mouth, welcoming his probing tongue and fully enjoying the taste of him on her lips. The building arousal within her made her entire body quiver and she scrambled to be closer to him, her hands instantaneously reaching to his neck to pull him in further. The low groan coming from the back of Luke's throat only added fuel to her fire.

_/Force, Mara, I didn't think it could feel this good,/_ she heard in her mind. The momentary distraction slowed her ministrations but her lips remained captured in a thrilling dance against his love-thirsty mouth.

_/So you admit you've thought about it, then?/_

_/You have no idea./_

_/Try me./_

Mara felt a hand creeping up the back of her thin undershirt and she shivered involuntarily. For the first time she broke away from him, only to find a sensitive fold of flesh on his neck that she began to slowly nibble. It was sweet torture, what they were doing to each other, like two fervid teenagers lost in each other's embrace, hoping to the Maker that they would not be discovered.

"Oh, Luke," she whispered into his neck in-between kisses. "We shouldn't do this."

He continued massaging the hot flesh of her back, still in awe at his sudden discovery of her state of undress beneath the garment. "Should we stop?" he asked and inclined his neck to the side, taking pleasure in her actions.

"Luke," she mumbled his name again. With a regretful sigh she slowly parted from him, placing her palms flat against his chest as if physically unable to break their contact. At first her eyes were unable to meet him, too shaken and overwhelmed to face her body's assailant. But as she felt a gentle fingertip lifting her chin, her heart melted to gaze into those deep oceans of blue.

"I understand," he said softly. "If this isn't what you want . . . If I interpreted things wrong . . . I'm sorry. I pushed you, I--"

"Luke!" she interrupted him sharply, almost seeming angry at his misinterpretation. "I kissed you back."

"I, uh . . . what did you say?"

Mara laughed lightly, breaking the intensity of the moment that very much needed an interruption. "I kissed you back."

The force of Luke shutting his mouth from its wide open gape made a soft popping noise through the moment of silence. "Oh," he said softly, the word almost coming out as a question.

"I thought I made that obvious?" she raised an eyebrow and flashed him an amused grin.

Her wit and sense of humor were strikingly admirable and Luke could not help but smile. "I noticed, believe me, I noticed. I guess my head is just spinning with the newness of it all."

"Let me ask you," she said as she took a hand of his in both hers. "Where do you think this is going?"

"To the bedroom?" he managed to reply, his face flushing a bright shade of red through his own grin.

"Oh, I don't think you're ready for me yet, farmboy." She winked, absently massaging the length of one of his fingers. "And by ready I mean deserving."

"So we're just going to sit here on the couch and torture each other all day?"

"If you're lucky."

He chuckled softly. "You want me to beg, don't you?"

"Oh, in the worst way," she drew out each word.

"And what, pray tell," in a bold move, he scooped Mara up and piled her in his lap, "would you have me beg _for_?"

She gazed deeply into his eyes and whispered, "For anything that you want."

He raised both eyebrows and held onto her waist firmly. "I have a pretty active imagination. And," he gently grazed her exposed hip, eliciting a shiver from her body, "I told you I wanted to know _your_ fantasies.

"Tell me, Mara," he continued. "Are you wearing that black lace that nearly got me castrated yesterday?" A wandering hand traced a soft line at the waistband of her trousers.

Slowly, Mara leaned in close to him, her lips a mere centimeter from contact and whispered, "I'm not wearing _any_thing underneath this."

Luke's mouth went dry and he willed his pulse to slow. "Nothing?"

"Nothing." She brushed her lips in light contact against his own, feeling his body's reaction beneath her.

"Mara," he groaned. "You're a wicked woman."

"You have no idea."

"Wait." He took in a deep, cleansing breath and gently pushed her to arms length to look upon her, the full seriousness of their imminent coupling suddenly coming into view. "This—us—are you sure it's such a good idea?"

"No," she admitted. "It might not be a good idea. But I want this, I want _you_. You've been my foe, my ally, my best friend, so why not my . . . oh Gods, Luke, don't make me use that word."

"Lover, boyfriend, what?"

"I don't," she huffed and closed her eyes, taking in a slow breath once she opened them. "I need my freedom. It's all I have. So if this 'thing' is going to happen between us—"

"Mara, I don't want anything from you. It's just you I need. But I'm not looking for just a one night stand, either. You're too important to me for that."

"It's the middle of the day, Skywalker," she adjusted herself a bit forcefully in his lap, "And I plan on having many, many more encounters. I'm in this for the long haul."

Luke looked up at her, a dry lump in his throat as she projected an image of them lying in her bed together in the full heat of passion. The lust between them was nearly palpable. He let his fingers tickle her trim waist, a fire burning in his eyes as they pierced through her inner most desires.

In one swift movement Mara had one leg in place on either side of the unsuspecting Jedi, straddling him in a way that left no doubt in Luke's mind that she had pledged herself completely to him and him only. He gasped at the sensation she was bringing to him with the slow but deliberate movement of her hips.

Hungrily and with a sense of urgency Mara had never felt come from him, Luke brought her head down to him and kissed her with overwhelming need. Their kisses were short and strong with mouths open wide and probing tongues, seeking to give and receive as much pleasure as possible. She could feel every nuance of movement urging her forward to an ecstasy she had not felt in a very long time. With a thought that sent shudders down to her core she knew that Luke could take her far beyond anything she had ever experienced in the past.

Luke's Force sense was on fire, letting him feel every emotion that Mara felt, as she felt it, compounding his own sensations. Every nerve in his body tingled with an overwhelming need to become one with her; He needed to fill her, and to fulfill them both.

In a primal, subconscious movement, Mara grinded against his firmness and let a soft moan escape only to be caught by Luke's eager tongue. She felt his hands once again on her back and shivered as she felt the undershirt slowly being lifted up, away from her body. Somewhere in the back of her mind she sensed the garment being unceremoniously thrown into an unidentified corner of the room, but she couldn't be sure.

Dozens of appealing options flashed before Luke's mind. Pressing Mara against the wall and ravishing her with the passion he knew he was capable of on the top of the list, having her pin him to the ground with all he knew _she_ was capable of coming in a close second. He groaned audibly at the thought. He had known that Mara must have been an incredible lover. She put so much passion and intensity into everything else that she did in life that in the throws of passion she must be incredible, but nothing could have prepared him for the woman he all at once knew here for the first time.

He broke free from her mouth and hungrily began nibbling at the hot flesh of her neck and now exposed shoulder. "Gods, Mara, you are incredible."

With her eyes heavily lidded, Mara craned her neck to the side, allowing him full access to her. Her hands roamed over his neck and back, gently pulling the fabric of his shirt free from his waistband. With every kiss he planted, she could feel the fire within her grow. Her loins were beginning to throb and she could feel the tiny pool of desire begin to gather between her legs. What this man was doing to her body was incredible. She didn't know how much more she could take.

"We should have done this years ago." She moaned softly as she felt cool fingertips gently manipulating her breast.

Luke began to trail gentle kisses down to where his fingertips had touched, eliciting a sharp gasp and quiver from its owner. "Maybe, maybe not."

She snorted softly, running her fingertips through his damp hair. "So philosophical. Even whe—Oh!" The stars could have all fallen and Mara Jade would have not noticed for she found her most intimate area being paid great homage by a certain Jedi Master's fervent caress.

"Am I 'deserving' yet?"

She had fallen forward into Luke's chest and her reply came out as nothing but a moan in his ears. He continued to slowly stroke her swollen bud, painfully aware of his own desire that was demanding the attention it had so long been denied. But he wanted nothing more than to please Mara at that moment.

Mara shivered noticeably and then gasped as she felt herself being lifted up from the couch. With legs wrapped firmly around his waist she gripped his shoulders tightly, her eyes bearing deep into his soul. She could feel his hard member pressing proudly against her as he moved them into her bedroom.

Today would be the day that they would both remember for the rest of their lives. No matter what the outcome of their new relationship would be, they would always have this moment. With no verbal commitment and no terms of endearment exchanged, one man and one woman lay down together and rocked each other to an exhausted sleep in an ancient rhythm of love.

* * *

The sun had long since set behind the horizon on Coruscant when Luke suddenly became aware of his surroundings once again. Next to him, an insatiable red head murmured something incoherent into his shoulder. Something in the near distance was beeping. Insistently. And for no good Sith forsaken reason. 

"Mara," he groaned. "Your comm is beeping. Make it shut up."

"You make it shut up, Skywalker. I don't think I can walk."

Luke chuckled, a dry cough tickling the back of his throat. He planted a small kiss across her brow and after stumbling across a boot or two, managed to pull his trousers on before walking into the living areas of Mara's apartment.

The beeping seemed to grow louder and more irritating the longer it went on. In his bleary eyed state Luke could hardly comprehend his own name, let alone the writing and color labeling of Mara's comm unit. The flashing red button at the top of the keypad seemed as good a button as any to get the kriffing thing to shut up, and for a moment Luke thought he had succeeded, he really did.

"Luke?"

Wide eyed and with a full rush of adrenaline, Luke's head perked up to face the carefully controlled façade of Talon Karrde.

"Talon," Luke nodded once, crossing his arms over his chest as if standing half naked in Mara Jade's apartment this time of the evening was a perfectly normal sight to behold.

"Is Mara there?" He raised a questioning eyebrow, never one to seem surprised.

Luke could see the split second of concentration Karrde took to gaze behind him and search for Mara's presence. _/Mara! Karrde's on the comm!/_

_/What?! I told you to shut it off! Stall! I need to find my clothes./_

"Mara," Luke called aloud. "Are you out of the 'fresher yet?"

_/Good cover up, Skywalker./_

"Just a minute," she yelled from the other room.

Karrde cleared his throat, bringing Luke's attention back towards the screen. "I suppose it would be a futile question to ask exactly what you're doing there?"

"Yes," responded Mara, coming into full view beside Luke, "it would be."

"Hello, Mara," Karrde smiled politely. "You're looking lovely this evening."

Mara stood there barefoot wearing the same trousers she had been wearing earlier, but her undershirt which had been thrown into a yet unidentified part of her apartment was nowhere to be found. Instead, she had pulled on a loose fitting, unmistakably masculine tunic.

"I, um," Luke sputtered, "I'll go make some hot chocolate." He quickly scurried off to the kitchen prep unit.

"Karrde, it's late and I'm on vacation. What is it?"

"Mara . . . I have a very important question to put past you," he said with all seriousness. "The answer to this question could very well reflect upon the rest of my life as a man."

"All right?" Mara wrinkled her face as she viewed him holding up two similar looking tunics.

"The blue one," he raised his left hand, "or the grey?" he raised the other.

"Karrde, did you call me just to ask my advice on your wardrobe?"

"What?" he smiled in earnest and shrugged lightly. "This is important, Mara."

"Talon?"

"Yes?"

"Good night."

"But, Mara, I—"

With one quick motion Mara switched the comm screen off and pursed her lips tightly together. Luke, on the other hand, could not restrain his amusement and began to laugh aloud.

"Skywalker," she warned.

"Oh, come on, Mara. Lighten up. That was funny!"

"Perfect," she grumbled and took a hot mug from Luke's offered hand. "He undoubtedly knows what's going on, now."

"Is that such a horrible thing? Are we keeping this a secret?" he asked honestly.

"No," she sighed, taking a comforting sip of her hot chocolate. "I don't keep secrets. But I'd prefer to let people know on my—our—own terms."

"So no regrets, then?"

She smiled sweetly and closed her eyes, remembering the hours of love making they had endured, each moment to be a permanent etching in her mind. "None. You?"

"Never," he whispered huskily. He set his mug down and stepped in closer to her, pushing a wayward curl away from her flushed face before possessing her own drink and also setting it down. "This feels right."

Slowly, Mara nodded, feeling unsure of her own thoughts. The Force bond that Mara had assumed would recede once their coupling had been completed had in fact remained for long after. She could still feel the emotional echo of Luke's own mind with her. In only the short amount of time she had been living with the new presence in her head, Mara did not think she could now live without it.

"Stay with me here tonight?" she asked, only a hint of her uneasiness slipping through her calm.

"If that's what you want. I would love to." He wrapped his arms gently around her waist and kissed her forehead. "I think I like that shirt better on you."

Mara snorted. "It's about three sizes too big."

"Exactly. Leaves more to the imagination."

"And we all know what an active imagination you have."

"Well, maybe _you _do anyway."

"Mm." Mara tilted her head up to plant a gentle kiss on his lips. "I think I know the real you. Not the person you want everyone to believe you are."

"Oh? And is this a good thing or a bad thing?"

"Don't know. Why don't you tell me?"

"Good." He gently stroked her lower back beneath the fabric of his own tunic. "I can't imagine anyone else I would entrust that to."

"Even your sister, your family, your friends?" She looked up into his eyes, seeking the truth in his words.

"You are my friend," he replied sincerely. "And much more. My . . ."

"Right," she laughed softly. "You try saying the word now. Girlfriend, lover? Nothing seems appropriate."

"No," he smiled thoughtfully. "It doesn't. You're my best friend and I trust you with my whole being: my mind, my body, and my heart."

Mara's face suddenly took on a grave look and her face wrinkled in a way Luke had never seen. "I won't hurt you like that callous bitch did," she growled.

He winced at the sudden bitterness in her words.

Callista. He had not thought of her in quite some time now, had pushed that memory back into the far reaches of his mind. It was a bitter sweet memory he held of her; one of love and also of a deep agonizing pain. The fact that his past loves caused Mara any kind of concern was mind boggling.

"I'm sorry," she murmured. She hung her head down, allowing strands of hair to tickle her cheeks. "This bond we share, if you'd like to call it that, has opened up a lot of doors to me and emotions I'm not used to."

Tenderly he raised her chin to once again look into her piercing green eyes. "Mara, I've been through a lot in my lifetime and so have you."

He could feel her Force sense slowly receding from his mind and he ached for the impending loss.

"Please don't," he pleaded. "I don't want to cause you any pain, especially not from a memory that no longer holds any real significance."

"I won't hurt you like that," she repeated in a whisper.

"I know. There were different circumstances with Callista." Although he felt like saying more to explain the complexity of the situation, words failed him miserably and he ended with that.

Tenderly she stroked the clef of his chin. "You know I'm not going anywhere?"

"Yes. At least not for a while, anyway."

"Luke, I . . . You know I can't make any promises, but . . ." She trailed off, unable to complete her sentence.

"I know. It's okay." With a tinge of sorrow scarring his features, Luke tried to smile. "Let's not talk about it right now."

"Thanks."

Slowly she pushed herself away from him to reclaim her mug of hot chocolate and quickly checked the chrono. "It's still early," she commented lightly. "Any plans for the rest of the evening?"

"No. I just want to spend it with you, wherever we are."

'There's that look,' Luke thought to himself. There was a mischievous gleam appearing in her eyes that lit up her entire face in a way that made his entire body quiver. "What did you have in mind?" he asked aloud.

"Oh, just some quality time with the new man in my life."

"And by quality time we're talking about . . ." He returned her impish grin.

"Oh, yes, a lot of that. I'm not quite satisfied yet."

Boldly he stepped in closer to her, pressing the full length of his body against hers. "I think I like the sound of that."

Mara sighed softly and craned her neck to the side as he began leaving sweet, burning kisses across her collar bone.

_/Mara?/_

_/Mm?/_

_/Are you, ah, protected?/_ Luke heard the gentle laughter flutter through his mind. He didn't think the question was so funny.

_/Yes, farmboy. Good for you to think about it _now./

"Sorry," he mumbled into her neck. "I know you would have stopped me if you weren't."

"Mm-hmm."

Slowly he lifted his head, taking on a serious look as he gazed upon her beautiful features. "Do you ever think about children? About having your own someday?"

"Whoa, there. I don't think we're ready to have that conversation yet."

"I didn't mean it like that," he apologized, blushing slightly. "Not necessarily with me, just in general. Is it something you would ever consider to be in your future?"

Mara furrowed her brows. "Maybe. If circumstances were right. My job doesn't offer a whole lot of stability and that isn't something I would want to bring a child into the world with. And the man I was with would have to be something pretty special to make me give up that kind of freedom."

"Do you like running around from place to place, never having a permanent home?"

"I've never had a reason to stay anywhere for any length of time. No family, and the majority of the people I consider to be my friends are those who I work with."

"And yet, you're here."

"Yes," she said softly. "I'm here."

"With me."

"With you."

"Mara?" He took her hand, squeezing it gently.

"Yes?"

Luke stealthily called two boots towards him using the Force and held them both up in opposing hands. "The black ones?" he held up one boot, "Or the grey?"

The next morning Luke would wake with a very painful headache.


	6. Chapter 6

**Open Your Door **

J. Bredin

* * *

**Chapter 6 **

One Week Later

"Anakin!" Leia yelled at her youngest child. "Go to your room right this instant!"

"But Mom!"

"Don't 'but Mom' me, mister. Move it!"

With a huff and defeated slumped shoulders, Anakin sulked off down the hallway. "I was only trying to see how it worked," he mumbled and the sound trailed off as he shut the door to his and Jacen's bedroom.

"Let me guess," Han asked, searching through a category of items Anakin could have managed to disassemble this time. "The caf brewer?"

Leia spun around on her heels, most—but not all—of her anger dissipating as she saw her husband's amused grin. "No, worse. The comm relay. Honestly, I don't understand! Were you like this as a child?"

"What can I say?" he shrugged lightly and smiled. "The kid is curious."

"Curiosity is fine. Dismantling all the machinery in the house isn't."

"Um." Carefully he wrapped his arms around Leia's shoulders, holding her in a gentle embrace. "When are the other two due back home?"

"Soon, I think." She sighed softly, resting her cheek against his chest. "Luke said he would have them back before their bed time, and he'd better otherwise his head will be _mine_."

"And I'm sure he knows it. Where'd the kid take them, anyway?"

Leia gently broke away from him and gazed at some unknown area of the wall behind him. "Apparently he _and_ Mara took the both of them to the Museum of the Republic. Anakin whined and said he wasn't interested so he didn't go."

"A museum, huh?" He stroked his chin absently. "I guess maybe Luke and Mara are both going a little stir crazy without anything to do around here."

"Mama!" two very energetic voices called through the main doorway as they rushed towards their parents.

"Hey you two!" Leia wrapped them in a warm embrace. "Did you guys have fun?"

Jaina nodded enthusiastically. "Did Uncle Luke and daddy _really_ come to save you on that nasty Death Star?"

Leia smiled softly. "Yes, darling, they did."

"Where were you Auntie Mara?" Jacen looked up at Mara, beaming with a very obvious crush. "Were you there, too?"

Han and Leia exchanged confused glances and both mouthed the words at the same time. 'Auntie Mara?'

"No, sweetie," Mara replied with amusement. "I wasn't there."

"Where were you?" asked Jaina.

Mara glanced around at the other adults within her company, looking for guidance. She didn't know what the Solos had told their children, if anything, about Mara's rather tainted past. Luke, who had decided to hang in the background and watch the scene with a gentle smile, nodded slowly. The Solos, Mara decided, were no help whatsoever.

"Well," Mara sighed and looked up at Leia once more who only smiled with encouragement. "Here, come sit down, kids."

Jacen and Jaina quickly made their way into the sitting room and bounced onto the repulsors of the sofa, waiting not so patiently for Auntie Mara to begin her story. Luke, too, took a seat across from Mara and sat down to watch the show.

"Have your parents or Uncle Luke ever told you who I used to work for?"

In unison the two children both shook their heads 'no.'

"But you work for Talon Karrde now, don't you?" asked Jacen.

"Yes, that's right. But I didn't always work for such a nice man. I used to work for a very, very bad man, only I didn't understand how bad he was until many years after."

"Who was he?" Jaina prodded.

"Well," Mara paused, gathering encouragement from Luke through a caress he sent her mind through the Force. "This man was called Darth Sideous or The Emperor as most people know him."

Jacen's mouth gaped open, akin to the likes of his father's most unique open mouth stares. "You worked for The Emperor?" he asked with just a noticeable amount of disappointment in his voice.

"Yes, Jacen," she nodded. "I did. The Emperor found me when I was very little, younger than you, and took me from my family. He raised me to believe he was a good man. He only used me because I had a strong power in the Force, just like you two.

"Now let's see . . ." Mara gazed inwards, remembering a time long ago when the first Death Star had still existed. "It was just before my twenty-first birthday when your Uncle Luke here blew up the Death Star. So at the time when your mommy was being rescued, I would have probably been on a mission for the Emperor way out in the Outer Rim territories."

"What did you do there?" the young girl asked innocently.

Han, much to Mara's relief, broke the story telling off there. "Okay, kids. It's almost bed time. Why don't you go get ready for bed?"

"But D-a-a-a-d," Jacen argued.

"Your father's right," said Leia as she ushered both of her children towards their bedrooms. "Maybe Mara will finish her story another day. Say goodnight to everyone."

"Goodnight, Auntie Mara!" said the two children in unison and turned to scurry down the hall.

"Goodnight, Uncle Luke!" Jaina added as an afterthought.

Luke chuckled behind the hand covering his mouth.

Once they were out of hearing range, Han turned to face Mara and could not hide his amusement. "So, _Auntie_ Mara, how did they behave?"

"Can it, Solo," growled Mara. "They started it themselves this afternoon. However, your children are very well behaved and polite, and quite inquisitive."

"Speaking of inquisitive," Leia started as she entered back into the sitting room. "Between the four of us, _some_one needs to fix our comm unit. Anakin decided he wanted to see how it worked."

"Again?" Luke offered.

Leia was not so amused. "Yes. Again. Just for that I think you and flyboy over here can get to work. I don't know how extensive the damage is this time."

Han and Luke both groaned and muttered something about 'strong women.'

Impishly, Leia grinned. "Mara, would you like some caf while the boys are occupied?"

She took a moment to glance at Luke and afford herself a gentle snort before agreeing and pushing herself up from the cushion. "I would love to, Leia. Thank you. Have fun boys!"

The two women glided into the breakfast dining area chatting to themselves, paying no mind as Han and Luke grumbled to themselves and began arguing over who should take the first look at young Anakin's handiwork.

"They seem awfully buddy-buddy," Han said as he rolled over onto his back, checking the underside of the desk which the comm unit rested on.

"Yeah," the other replied casually, staring off into the distance to where Mara and his sister had disappeared. "Mara's changed. She's not as bitter as she used to be, so maybe Leia is warming up to her."

Han peeked out from underneath the desk and studied Luke's far-off gaze. "I don't think she's the only one."

"Huh?" Luke spun back around to face his brother-in-law, arms folded casually over his chest.

"Come on, kid. It's me you're talking to." He gave a quick wink. "You and Mara seem very comfortable with each other lately. And you've changed, too."

"Maybe." Feeling uncomfortable at suddenly being cornered, Luke looked down at his feet that seemed to become of peculiar interest.

"So?" Han urged on. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," he insisted. "Well, not much. I mean nothing official. We, ah--aw kriff it," Luke swore under his breath.

The Corellian laughed heartily. "I get it. There's something going on, but you don't know what it is, Mara doesn't know what it is, and therefore you don't want anyone else knowing what it is?"

"Something like that." Luke smiled sheepishly.

"Been there, done that, it did happen to work. Although I wouldn't recommend the same method for you."

"Right," Luke restrained a chuckle. "The kidnapping usually runs in reversal roles for us."

/. . ._a _very_ active imagination, Skywalker._/

/_You getting the same treatment in there?_/ he asked, ignoring the implications in her statement.

_/Worse probably./_

_/You telling the truth?/ _

_/A very wise man once told me 'From a certain point of view.'/_

Luke snorted aloud, eliciting a very confused smirk from Han. "Not even going to ask," he muttered before burying his head once again beneath the desk. "Hand me my tool set, would ya, kid?"

"Sure."

* * *

"So how's your vacation going, Mara?" Leia asked over her cup of caf, nursing it for the warmth.

"It's strange," Mara admitted. "I always thought that if I didn't keep myself busy, if I had nowhere to be needed, that it would drive me crazy. It's turned out to be quite the opposite. I never thought sitting at home doing nothing could be so entertaining."

Leia smiled warmly at the other. "I know. I don't get many days off to myself, but when I do it's wonderful. I love my husband and my children more than life, but to have just one day alone with no distractions is the greatest relaxation imaginable."

"How do you do it? Keep your family and your career in such perfect balance?"

"I wouldn't call it perfect." Leia paused for a silent moment of reflection. "You've been around from the very beginning of my family; you know what a difficult journey it's been so far. I don't pretend to think it's going to get any easier. The children have already been through so much, more than they should have. I think we can all relate to that, unfortunately.

"As for my relationship with Han, it's been strained many times due to my busy work schedule. He understands but it doesn't make it any easier. Finding time for just the two of us is more important as each year passes. You'll find your own balance once you have your own family, too. Just keep in mind that it never is 'perfect.'"

A long few minutes of silence passed between the two women as Mara took Leia's words to heart. Leia had never withheld any information from Mara, but she had rarely been so forthcoming with the ups and downs of her personal life. Idly, Mara wondered if it was Leia or herself who had taken the initiative to open to the other.

"May I ask you something personal?" Leia asked, breaking the silence.

Carefully Mara arched an eyebrow. "Yes?"

"Luke seems unusually—well—happy as of late. Might you have anything to do with it?" Leia knew she was treading on very unstable ground asking Mara such an intimate question, but the natural protectiveness of her family and the downright lingering curiosity had gotten the better of her.

Had it been in any other time in her life Mara's first reaction would have been to bite out an unconditional denial. But she had come too far to back down now. After all, she and Luke had agreed that they would not keep their relationship a secret; however they had not agreed to publicly broadcast it.

"Luke and I have a very _unique_ relationship with one other. We have our ups and downs just like any friends and right now just happens to be a high," Mara stated, betraying nothing.

Knowingly, Leia smiled. "I see. And this 'high' just happens to include a certain level of intimacy?"

"Leia," Mara growled in a warning, hiding her grimace behind her mug of caf. "Unique does not necessarily constitute sexual."

"I didn't say sexual, did I?" Leia grinned inwardly. It was one of Mara's own tactics and she was falling right into it; revealing details which were uncalled for.

"Intimate can mean emotional," added Leia.

At that precise moment Luke chose to broadcast his emotions full throttle, pounding Mara's mind with an image of himself cuffed to the bedposts with Mara straddling him. Although Mara tried not to blush, she was sure her face must have turned three shades of red before she had regained enough control to berate her mind's assailant.

_/. . . A _very_ active imagination, Skywalker./ _

/_You getting the same treatment in there?_/ she heard in her mind, knowing fully well that he probably knew every word that had been spoken since they parted.

Mara tried not to audibly scoff._ /Worse probably./_

_/You telling the truth?/ _

Leia looked on in earnest as Mara's gaze took on a far away look. It was the same look, she noted, which both she and Luke took on as they were communicating through the Force.

_/A very wise man once told me 'From a certain point of view,'/ _Mara sent with amusement. She also sent him a mental chiding to mind his own business although she never put the thought into words.

Leia cleared her throat, bringing Mara's attention back towards present company. "And you were saying?"

"What?" Mara frowned. "I suppose it can be emotional, too. Look," she sighed and placed her caf down on the table, folding her hands gently in her lap. "This is unfamiliar territory for me. Neither Luke or I have much of a private life so what we do or do not do with each other is a rather touchy subject."

"I understand. And I don't mean to be pushy, but if there is something happening you shouldn't hide it. It will only add strain to an already fragile balance that you two share with each other." She smiled warmly, encouraging Mara to open up her heart. "You are both very strong willed people and I think you're the only one in this galaxy that could even think of contradicting him when he's wrong. He needs that."

The anger that Mara thought she would feel at Leia's assumptions never appeared and she was left only with an emotion that could be described as respect. No one else would dare meddle in her personal life and expect to walk away unscathed.

"He's a very special person," Mara almost whispered, her voice suddenly becoming dry and hoarse. "Sometimes I wonder what he sees in me and why he bothers to pursue a relationship, for lack of a better word, with someone who can aggravate him faster than a lightsaber can run you through."

Leia cocked her head slightly towards the side. "Maybe that is why. The rest of the galaxy sees him as some kind of superhuman, invincible to even death itself. You are one of the few who know better and challenge him. He probably hates you and in his own way, loves you for it."

"I suppose so. Luke would probably berate me for saying so, but we're both still very afraid of hurting each other in the way that we both know we are capable. And this time I'm talking emotionally. He would never strike me in anger or any other time, although I can't say the same for me." She smiled out of the corner of her mouth.

Leia laughed lightly. "I think men deserve it sometimes. It reminds them that we're not so fragile and that we don't _need_ them. We just keep them around because we want to."

Mara's face crinkled in a strange sort of way. "Need is a pretty strong word. The tension between me and Luke has been building for so long and I've become so accustomed to his presence that if I were to lose it, I don't know if I could bear it." The vulnerability that scarred her own voice surprised even Mara herself. She was getting soft, an occupational hazard. But, Mara reminded herself, she was at least for the moment not working.

"I imagine that you share something very special. You both have a very strong mark in the Force. I can only imagine how it might be in a more personal sense." For a moment Leia though she saw Mara blush, but as soon as it appeared, it has vanished from her face.

"Do you ever feel like you missed out on something?" Mara asked. "I don't mean to belittle your relationship with Han at all, it's just a question."

"Never. Han is absolutely the only man for me. We don't have a Force bond, but we do have a certain emotional bond. And it grows stronger with each day that passes."

"I envy you, and I know that Luke does, too." She gazed inwards and thought to herself for a short moment. "Maybe we'll both have that one day. Whether it be with each other or with someone else."

"I think both of you know where the path will take you. You just have to trust in the Force, and in each other."

"Mm." The suddenly quiet Mara Jade slumped back into her chair, taking slow sips of her caf as she tried in vain to regain her mental bearings. The past week she had spent with Luke had been wonderful and stressful at the same time. Mara had never imagined how wonderful a real relationship could be, could never have hoped to imagine. The connection she shared with the Jedi would be something she knew she would cherish for the remainder of her life. She did not, however, know for how long their relationship would continue. Would Luke regret it? Did he, could he love her the way she knew she loved him?

'How long can we continue this way?' she asked herself.

_/For as long as my heart keeps beating,/_ the gentle lull of a masculine voice fluttered through Mara's mind. _/And for each lost day, Mara. Never doubt it./_

The tears that glazed Mara's eyes was a sight that Leia was never prepared for. As she sat there, studying the woman's far away gaze, Leia could not help but smile at the feeling of warmth radiated from the Force itself.

Everything was well in the universe.

* * *

"Thank you, Leia. I'll meet you later in the week for practice." Mara gripped the woman's hand gently and was surprised as she brought Mara in close for a sisterly hug.

"Remember what I said," Leia whispered for only Mara to hear. She felt a nod in response.

"What was that about 'practice'?" Luke asked her as they made their way down the corridor.

"That." Mara pursed her lips together. "I told your sister I'd meet her for some lightsaber practice. I've gotten a bit rusty lately with my skills and she's more my equal than you are."

Luke smiled. "I don't know about that. I remember you being quite skilled with your weapon." Out of the corner of his eye Luke could see Mara's lightsaber swaying gently against her hip as she walked beside him; the lightsaber that he himself had given her.

"Why haven't you constructed your own?" he asked her absently.

Mara looked down at the saber, remembering that day all those years ago on the roof top. "I don't know," she said honestly. "Maybe because I don't think I'm ready. After all, I'm not a true Jedi yet."

They entered the turbolift in relative silence until Luke felt the need to break it. "Why is that?"

"Don't get me started, Skywalker," she growled with the use of his surname.

"Mara," he tried to speak gently, despite his aggravated state of mind. "You have no other commitments right now. What's holding you back? What are you afraid of?"

"I'm not afraid," she mumbled.

The turbolift doors opened to Luke's floor and Mara huffed as he placed a hand at the small of her back to usher them towards his apartment.

"Then what is it?" he asked her, keying open the door.

Mara threw her cloak onto a chair in the living room and turned swiftly to meet his gaze, her hands placed firmly on her hips. "I knew it wouldn't be long before you started pestering me again. Why is this so important to you? And don't say because it's my destiny. That's not why it's important to you."

"It _is_ your destiny, Mara. I want you to claim what is rightfully yours." He looked at her with pleading eyes, forcing some of the anger to subside.

"Luke," Mara sighed and collapsed onto the sofa. "Let me try to explain. Sit."

Luke did as he was told and took a seat across from Mara, carefully watching her every expression. Although their minds remained open to each other on a superficial level, the exchange of thoughts and deep emotion was limited to conscious conveyance. Luke would never betray Mara's trust by invading her mind that way.

"You want it blunt, Skywalker? I don't like how you run things on Yavin." There, she had said it. Luke would certainly be hurt but he at least deserved an honest answer.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean," she replied calmly, "I don't like how the academy is set up. No one student will ever get the attention he or she deserves and needs."

Luke looked down. "Is that why you left before?"

"Partially." She nodded. "Even at that time I was attracted to you. Maybe I wanted more than even I realized. But you hardly gave me a second glance while I was there. I felt like I deserved, _deserve_ more. That and I did have other things I was involved in. I trained when I could; I gave it my best. You can't ask for more than that."

"No," he whispered. "You do deserve better, Mara, and I'm sorry. There was so much happening whenever you were on planet . I couldn't even afford myself a second glance, let alone anyone else."

"I know. I don't blame you, or anyone else. I just don't think I'm cut out for the jungle life."

"I don't think you give yourself enough credit. You've learned a lot on your own. There's very little standing in your way right now."

Mara gracefully moved herself to curl into his lap, resting the back of her head against his shoulder. "You're the only objective I want on my mind right now."

"Is it still an objective if you've already conquered it?" He planted a small kiss against the back of her neck, feeling the shiver course down her spine. "I'm yours now, you know."

"I know," she whispered, melting into his warmth. She felt his strong arms wrap around her from behind and she closed her eyes to the comfort he provided. Her heart ached to declare her love for the Jedi Master but her mind would not yet allow it. If and when she was ever ready Luke would be waiting, but he would not push. He was, thankfully, maintaining a respective amount of personal space.

_'I need my freedom. It's all I have.'_ Luke had heard her words and would not hold her back. If she wanted to back out he would not stop her.

_'And yet, you're here.'_

_'Yes, I'm here.'_

_'With me.'_

_'With you.'_

Picking up on her suddenly somber mood, Luke shifted beneath Mara. "Would you rather be alone?" he asked.

"No, please." She held his arms around her tighter. "I'd like to stay here with you tonight. If that's okay?"

"Of course it's okay, Beautiful. My mind and body ache for you when you're not near."

"And how would you know that, Skywalker?" She smiled sweetly. "You've hardly let me out of your sight for the past week."

Luke's only reply was to bury his face in her hair which was sprawled across their joined shoulders. The heavenly scent filled his nostrils and he smiled in content.

"Luke?"

"Mm?"

"Don't let me out of your sight tonight," she pleaded with longing in her voice.

Just as always he was there to reassure her, replying in a whisper, "Never."

Night fell with a bitter chill in the air while Luke and Mara kept each other warm, making love into the early hours of morning.


	7. Chapter 7

**Open Your Door**

J. Bredin

And I bet you all thought this story was as good as dead, didn't you? Truth is, it's never been far from my mind. Just far from _my_ priorities and abilities, as real life situation have made it far more difficult to find time to write. I make no promises about future chapters or when they may appear, but I am determined to not leave this as an unfinished work forever.

I began writing this story more than ten years ago. That's longer than it took Luke and Mara to finally settle down in the canon storyline. So here's to hoping that it won't be another six (!) years before I update again.

I hope you enjoy.

* * *

**Chapter 7**

Mara awoke to find her bed—her bed?—no, it was Luke's bed, empty beside her. She sat up in a start, searching for the warm body that had been ever present for the past week. He was not to be seen. Pulling the sheet against her chilled breasts, Mara placed her bare feet to the floor. Thank the Force for carpeting.

She sent out a gentle tendril through the Force, seeking his whereabouts. _/Luke?/_

Warm reassurance washed over her. _/I'm in the living room. Couldn't sleep./_

Lazily Mara threw an oversized robe over her slim form, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. Dim glow lamps lit her way as she tread to where Luke sat in his common area, sipping at a mug of spiced hot chocolate on his sofa.

"Skywalker, it's too kriffing early," she groaned. "What in the name of the Force are you doing awake?"

He shrugged lightly. "I couldn't sleep," he repeated aloud.

A lazy brow attempted to lift across Mara's eye. "You've never had trouble sleeping before."

"I've never had a sleeping partner," he retorted.

She huffed softly. "Are you saying I snore or something?"

He smiled as she plopped down next to him. "Nothing so un-ladylike, I assure you."

"Good. But I'm not very lady-like." She yawned, covering her mouth with the back of her hand.

"On the contrary," he smirked. "I find you _very_ womanly." A fingertip grazed her exposed thigh.

Mara flinched just slightly. "Really now, what are you doing awake?" She glanced at the chrono across the room, reading the display with blurry eyes. "I think it's only been a couple of hours since we, or _I_, fell asleep anyway."

He shrugged. "I couldn't sleep. I had a lot on my mind."

Carefully, Mara looked over his somber face. The Jedi Master had been doing some serious contemplating, the lines creasing his forehead were proof positive of the fact. "Like what?" she asked, picking up on his own agitation.

"Honestly?"

"I wouldn't have asked otherwise."

Luke took in a slow breath and let it out in a heap. "Us."

"Oh." Mara looked down, hugging the robe more closely against her. 'Us' was still a new concept. For so many years life had been solitary. On rare occasions when Mara had been thrust into collaboration with Luke they had been a team on a strictly professional level, a placid friendship just happened to follow suit. There was now a new personal meaning of 'us' to consider, neither of them could deny its existence. So much so, in fact, sometimes she felt that she could reach out and touch it. Their bond had become nearly tangible.

But, she thought, what if he grew tired of waiting for her to make a real commitment and decided he no longer wanted her? _Maybe,_ she thought ruefully, _he deserves more than I can give him right now._

"Stop it," Luke nearly growled. "Don't think that way."

Mara looked up at him sharply, stung by his strong retort to her unspoken thoughts. "Get out of my head, Skywalker."

"Stop broadcasting your emotions, _Jade_." He matched her glare. "It's hard to ignore the thoughts that you bombard straight towards me."

"I don't—"

"Yes," he asserted, cutting her off, "you do. I don't think you even realize that you do it. I know you have better shields than that. So I can only assume that you want me to hear certain things."

"And why would I want that?"

He shrugged. "Maybe you're too afraid to say the words aloud; I don't know. But I wish you would sometimes, instead of me having to guess what you feel so often."

Mara pleaded with her eyes. "This is hard for me, Luke. To be so close to you—to anyone for that matter—and be so affected."

"Is that such a bad thing?"

"No," she said sincerely, some of her tension softening. "It just takes some getting used to. Quite a lot actually."

"What are you afraid of?" He looked at her with a worn expression, as if he had asked the question a hundred times before.

The reply that Mara assumed would leave her mouth out of pure instinct never came, and she was instead left staring at him speechless with her mouth posed open. "I . . . don't know."

Gently, Luke draped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer. The feel of her head resting against his shoulder brought some calm to his ragged nerves.

"You don't have to always be so defensive," he told her. "It's just me. I know all of your deepest, darkest secrets and I've never thought less of you for any of it. You should know that by now."

An instantaneous feeling of security engulfed Mara. The sound of his rhythmic breathing, the gentle lull of his heartbeat and the sweet mark in the Force that was uniquely Luke surrounded her. "Thank you," was all she could manage. "You'll always be a part of me, Luke. No matter what happens."

"I know. I always have been."

Mara snorted and smirked in a silent amusement. "Yes, and for many more years of my life than yours. At least I can say that I _did_ dream about you every night for many years."

"Hey!" the Jedi Master adjusted himself to look directly at her. "I'd like to think that not all of those dreams involved me dying in some twisted fashion of your choosing. You know, Mara, some people in this galaxy still go out to dinner on a first date."

"Oh, I don't know. Don't all great love stories begin with a kidnapping?" She smiled playfully as Luke chuckled.

"Those aren't called love stories, Mara. Those are third rate pornographic holos."

In Mara's groggy state, she couldn't help but burst out into laughter. "And how would you know, Skywalker?" she managed to breathe. "I didn't see anything quite so incriminating in your holo collection."

The old Luke would have blushed. This Luke who belonged to Mara just grinned. "A good Jedi keeps all his incriminating evidence under lock and key. Say, in a night stand drawer."

Mara laughed a little harder. "You mean to tell me that Luke Skywalker, Jedi Master, hero of the New Republic, has a secret pornography collection?"

"What?" He grinned, but Mara could not tell if he was joking or not. "Even Jedi get lonely sometimes. Come to think of it, Jade, you seem to have a rather large night stand drawer. Do tell, what secrets do you keep in there?" _And why haven't you shared?_, he thought silently to himself.

"Mm," she grinned, picking up on his thought. "A trader gets quite lonely, too. Her fantasies are all she has."

"Ooh, _those_ kinds of secrets." He grinned in a devious way and leaned in to press his lips against hers, slowly, lustfully, and then began to suckle on an exposed earlobe with purpose. "Tell me, Mara, did you ever think of me when you touched yourself?" he drawled softly in her ear. He could hear and feel her shudder. But was it from embarrassment or arousal?

"Did you imagine it was me inside of you," Luke slowly drew his hand up Mara's smooth inner thigh and began to rub her exposed folds, newly moistened by his verbal tease. His own pulse jumped at the discovery that she wore nothing under her robe. "Did you call my name as you made yourself come? Wish that you were coming around me?" He took an eager nibble at her neck and he himself moaned as Mara's arousal peaked, her honey dripping around his fingers.

"Oh, Luke," she moaned.

"Did you, Mara?" He began to gently move one finger inside of her, agonizingly slow. "Did you think of me?"

"Mm." By now her eyes had fallen closed and her head rest peacefully against the back of the sofa.

"Because I thought of you, Mara." He laid her down across the sofa, pressing half his weight down upon her but leaving enough space to continue his ministrations. "Your face, your body, have plagued my fantasies for a long time. I wanted it to be you in my bed. Every time I dreamed, it was you that I wanted."

Mara could now feel Luke's erection reaching out for her through his thin sleeping trousers. She grabbed him eagerly and took pleasure in the stiff sigh and groan that he let out.

"And you're still not satisfied yet, farmboy?" she finally managed to speak. "We've been at it for days." She opened her eyes as she reached under his trousers to stroke the object of her desire.

"The rest of my life and I could never get enough of you." He stared her deeply in the eyes, true to his words even through his lust. "Never."

"Well let's just bring it one step closer to never, then," she responded in an equally serious tone. That was all Luke needed before pushing away Mara's robe to plunge deep into her slick opening.

Mara inhaled sharply and looked up into those blue pools that desired her so desperately. She wrapped her legs tightly around his back and pushed up to meet his hips. She held him there tightly, unmoving, searching his face for answers to unspoken questions. She didn't even know the questions, let alone the answers.

Gently she raised a hand to his cheek. Her thumb absently grazed across his full mouth and she shivered as he kissed her palm in response. This felt different somehow, more intense, even though they were holding perfectly still. The Force around them pulsated in unison with their beating hearts. She could feel him inside of her, feel him straining against his body's natural desire to thrust. When she felt him throb from within, her own body clenched in response and she was awarded a loud sigh of her name. He was making her mind and body physically ache for him.

Gently but with great purpose Mara sought out Luke's deeper, more intimate Force presence. It had become a ritual during their coupling and made all previous partners seem so insignificant in comparison. His eyes seemed to lost focus as she flooded his mind with her presence and it looked as though he had to concentrate on keeping himself from falling onto her, his arms becoming shaky. It was almost as if the wind had been knocked out of him.

/_Are you all right?/_

_/Perfect,/ _he responded.

She clenched around him again, this time intentionally.

"Kriff, Mara," he groaned and pressed into her further. "I don't stand a chance against you."

Mara smiled wickedly. "No, you don't." Another grasp, and this time she held it for as long as her out-of-exercise muscles would allow. The Jedi Master trembled above her, drawing his hips away from her body and then crashing back down forcefully.

His eyes once again locked with hers and she could almost see their intertwined souls. Inside of Mara a maelstrom of emotion was brewing and she could feel the waves violently cresting. Luke desired her, needed her—mind, body and spirit—and she could tell just by the way he looked at her. He showed his need every hour of the day in the most mundane of situations. A brush of his hand against the small of her back, a brief kiss on her cheek, a brush of his Force sense across her mind when they were not physically together. All of these things spoke of how much he had come to need Mara in his life.

And right then and there Mara realized that she needed to be needed. As a woman and not just as the trader, liaison, friend she had become. Luke had filled a void she hadn't even known had existed and without either of them even trying. Not too surprisingly, Mara realized that _she_ also needed _him_. Just as much as she needed air to breathe, he had become a necessity of her physical and mental being.

And she loved him. Force help her, but she loved him.

But she couldn't tell him. Not now in the midst of their lovemaking. If there was ever anything that Mara Jade had learned from service in within the Empire or even with Karrde for that matter, it was that timing was everything.

Just as soon as the realization hit her, she slammed the thought deep down inside and locked it away, shielding the newly realized emotion from the object of its creation. If he had felt any stir of her emotions she could not see it in his expression. He laid there atop of her, his eyes still transfixed upon her face.

"Yes," she whispered, answering a forgotten question.

Luke raised his eyebrows ever so slightly, drawing them together in confusion.

"Yes," she repeated. "I thought of you."

Luke sighed and bent down, crushing her mouth in a searing kiss. She whimpered and wrapped her arms around his neck, desperately holding on as if her being depended on it. If she could not express it out loud yet, at least she could express with her body just how much she needed him.

* * *

Mara inhaled deeply and shifted from foot to foot uncomfortably standing in front of the Solo's apartment door. She hadn't announced her visit, but somehow she felt as if she were expected. Her suspicion was confirmed when as she reached out to touch the door chime, the door swooshed open before her finger had made contact.

"Good evening, Mistress Mara," chirped Threepio. "Mistress Leia is in the study with Master Han. This way please."

Mara pursed her lips together in a thin line but did not reply. She would never admit it but a part of her had come to like the personality quirks of the Skywalker family droids. She understood why Luke had never wanted to give his R2 unit a memory wipe. He had the closest thing to a sense of humor that a non sentient being could posses.

"Mara, what a lovely surprise," Leia greeted with a bright smile. She sat with her husband on an overstuffed sofa, her legs curled beneath her flowing gown, her thin frame pressed close to Han's much larger side. In his hand, Han held an old fashion paper book. The other hand was wrapped lovingly around his wife.

Wife.

Could Mara dare to believe that she could have a picture as beautiful as the scene she had just walked in upon? She pushed the thought aside for the moment. She wasn't here to wallow in self pity, she could do that at home by herself.

"I'm sorry, I should have called," she apologized, feeling as if she were intruding upon an intimate moment.

"Nah," Han assured her. "Don't worry."

"You're welcome here any time, Mara," Leia offered. "Truly."

"Thanks," Mara sighed slowly, her eyes darting back and forth between the couple. Truth be told, she wasn't even sure why she was here exactly. She just knew that she could talk to Leia without the fear of being judged. The diplomat in her had learned a lifetime ago to not take things so personally. Unlike a favorite Jedi Master of hers.

Either Solo was harboring latent Force abilities or he sensed the tension in Mara's stance, because he cleared his throat and awkwardly disentangled himself from his wife. "I'll, ah, just leave you two lovely ladies alone for a while." He flashed Mara a polite smile and then bent down to place a sweet kiss on Leia's mouth.

"I love you," Leia offered softly.

"I know." He flashed both women a famous Corellian grin and Mara could see how Leia had fallen for the ex smuggler.

"Nerf," she mumbled as he bowed out of the door.

"I heard that," he called back from out of sight.

"You were supposed to!" Leia laughed airily.

Mara stifled her own snort and smiled, feeling more at ease. Leia stood walked to a small serving tray. "Care for some wine?"

"Sounds great," replied Mara, trying to sound more relaxed than she actually was.

Leia handed her a tall glass of a thick amber wine. It smelled dry and fruity, Mara thought as she swished it around in her glass before taking a small sip. The fiery liquid burned down her throat and left a warm trail down to her belly. Her mouth parted slightly and she felt the pleasant aroma dance upon her taste buds almost as an afterthought. She pulled the glass back and regarded it with a peculiar admiration. "This is quite lovely, actually."

"Isn't it?" Leia smiled and took a long sip of her own. "Lando introduced me to it. Leave it to him to find the exotic drinks."

"Yes. I believe he's also the one who introduced Luke the chocolate drink that he is so fond of."

Leia crinkled her nose ever so slightly. "Never could get used to that stuff."

"I've grown to like it." Mara smiled sheepishly.

"I'm sure." Leia paused and looked at the other woman for a silent moment. She sent out a light Force probe to gauge her emotions, fully expecting to get slammed by conditioned barriers. She was surprised, albeit pleasantly, to find Mara's shields lowered just enough to accept her surface probe.

Leia sat back down on the sofa with her glass in hand and motioned for Mara to do the same. "What's troubling you, Mara? Your thoughts are conflicted." It was a statement, not a question.

"I suppose it would do me no good to argue the fact," Mara muttered over her glass as she sat down next to Leia. Her free hand began to fidget and run its fingers along the cylindrical hilt at her hip. "But if I were to be honest, I'm not sure what's troubling me. I've started to feel this . . ." Mara narrowed her eyes slightly, gazing away into nothingness. ". . . prodding, nudging. As if something is out of balance. I can't explain it."

"Mm," Leia hummed sympathetically. "Have you spoken to Luke about this?"

"No," she said flatly, still staring at the wall. "For all his assertion of Jedi Code and 'there is no passion' bantha fodder he is certainly passionate about the Force and my place within it. He would tell me to meditate on it and the answer would reveal itself." She tried to sound bitter about the response but her delivery failed miserably. Mara could even hear it in her own ears.

Leia smiled. "It sounds to me like you already have your answer, then."

Mara sighed. "Yes . . . No. I don't know." She took a long swig of the thick liquid in her left hand. "Why haven't you achieved your knighthood yet? You're just as much a Skywalker as he is. Hasn't he pestered you enough about family legacy, destiny, that sort of thing?"

"Just like you, Mara, I have my own priorities," she answered without fail. "It's just not my time right now. The Force has other plans for me. My place is better served within the Galactic Senate at present. I have no doubts that in the future my place will be amongst the growing Jedi Order in some fashion. Luke knows this to be true, just as well as I do."

Mara nodded imperceptively, keeping her eyes downcast and emotions tied up tight. "I thought that was my excuse, too. That it wasn't my time. Now, I'm not so sure."

Kest. There, she had admitted it out loud.

"Are you reconsidering?"

"No," she said, the word coming out almost as a question. "But I think the Force is reconsidering _me_." Mara looked up to meet Leia's patient gaze. "All I know is a few weeks ago I started to feel this growing impatience within Karrde's organization. Work that I usually enjoyed and kept me busy just wasn't enough anymore. At the time I took that as a signal that I was just getting burnt out. For the first time ever I couldn't do it all and I needed a break."

"Everyone needs a break sometimes, Mara. There is no surprise in that."

Mara shook her head. "No, but that's not it. I'm not ashamed that I needed a break. Like you said, everyone needs it.

"But what did I do? I took the first exit I could and made my way to Coruscant. I'm second in command of the largest trading coalition out there and I just dropped it all on a whim sand said 'see you later!' There are a thousand resort planets out there, but no. I find my way onto the one space ball that has Luke Skywalker stationed on it. Do you know I actually _asked_ him to stay here on planet instead of going back to Yavin as he was planning?" She took in a deep breath. "At the time I thought I just needed his friendship to get me through whatever funk I was in. I did, and I do, but that prodding is still there. I felt pretty good for the first week or so that I was here, but now the tension is back."

Leia stared at her quietly, letting Mara sort through her own thoughts aloud. Sometimes, all you needed was a listening ear to bring the truth into focus.

"Stang, Leia. He means so much to me, now. But what can I offer him? I'm a former Imperial assassin. My life is among a questionably reputable smuggling organization; He's the Jedi Master, former Rebellion hero, Rogue Squadron leader, all around good guy. What kind of future could that possibly hold for us?"

"Leia!" Han's voice called from an intercom unit somewhere within the small study. Mara rolled her eyes, taking the opportunity to take in some more much-needed wine.

Leia smiled and silently apologized to Mara. "Yes, sweetheart?"

"Do you know where Jaina's stuffed ewok is? She won't go to sleep without it."

"If it's not in her room it must be in the boys' bedroom. Did you look there?"

"Now why didn't _I_ think of that!" His voice was dripping with sarcasm. "Wait, never mind. Goldenrod found it in the clean laundry. Poor ewok got another bath today I guess."

Leia snorted and pointed a finger towards the comm unit. "_That _is the kind of future you get. Han and I are not so different than you and Luke, if you remember. But Mara," Leia turned serious again. "Don't let anything, least of all your pride, stand in the way of your destiny. It may be your destiny, but you still must choose to accept it. I almost lost Han. And he almost lost me. But each time we ended up back in each other's arms. Now, is it because it was the will of the Force, or is it because we've both chosen to take matters into our own hands, simply letting the Force help in guiding our actions?"

Mara thought about Leia's words. To think that everything was predetermined would be resigning life and taking no responsibility for one's actions. What joys would there be in life if you felt that the decisions you made had no impact upon your own future? Leia was right. Even if the Force gave you a gentle nudge, it was ultimately your own decision that would bring it to fruition.

Surely her decision to leave Karrde had been her own. . . Hadn't it?

She furrowed her brows tensely. "I told your brother I wasn't cut out for the jungle life. I still don't disagree with that statement, but something is calling out to me. I never wanted the life that Luke had. Until now."

Love, as it turned out, would be the ultimate catalyst to a lifetime of unfinished business. Luke's place was among the Jedi, and Mara's place was with Luke. But she wasn't doing this to be with Luke. She could have that without any commitments. No, she was going to do this for herself.

"I think," she swallowed the last of her wine, "that it's _my_ time."

As soon as she said the words, a feeling of peace washed over her. She closed her eyes and inhaled slowly, momentarily seeking refuge in the warmth that surrounded her. "Do you feel that?" Mara asked aloud, her eyes still closed. Every nerve ending on her body had suddenly become tranquil, but instead of alarming her, the sensation brought her to a near trance-like state.

_There is no emotion; there is peace._

"Feel what?"

"Nothing," Mara said calmly and opened her eyes, smiling at Leia. "And I mean _nothing._ I think the Force has accepted my unconditional surrender."

"So that 'prodding'?"

"Is gone. This is the path I must choose." There was now conviction in Mara's choice. And yes, it was most definitely _her_ choice. The Force had laid forth the option, but she had had to make the ultimate decision on her own merit.

"I'm very glad to hear that." Leia gently placed a hand over Mara's. "And I know someone else who would probably be glad to hear it, too."

Despite the shining aura surrounding her, Mara still groaned.

"Don't worry. Luke has never been the kind of man to say 'I told you so,'" Leia teased.

Mara pursed her lips together. That little fact did nothing to shed any light on how she would broach the subject with Master Skywalker. 'Hey, guess what?' didn't really seem appropriate. But neither did 'I'm ready to fulfill my destiny.'

Seeing her disquiet, Leia gave Mara's hand a gentle squeeze. "Just treat him like Luke. Nothing more, nothing less. I, too, believe this is the path you are meant to take. And I do believe," she raised her eyebrows slightly and met Mara's gaze, "that you are meant to walk it with my brother."

Mara nodded in understanding. She would not be alone in this journey.

Skywalker had no idea what he was in for.


	8. Chapter 8

**Open Your Door**

J. Bredin

A/N: My many thanks to Juli and Steff. Although they may not always understand the characters and situations specifically, they always give me invaluable advice about plot and structure. And of course point out my grammatical errors which occur at 2 in the morning.

* * *

**Chapter 8**

"That's great, Kam," Luke said earnestly into the comm unit of his apartment. "It sounds like you all have everything under control."

Kam Solusar smiled ever so slightly and tried to assure him. "Do not worry, Master Skywalker. All here is well. The students are all progressing in their lessons and behaving themselves, for the most part. Between Tionne and I and the other senior Jedi, we can manage for as long as you need."

"Thanks and Kam?"

"Yes?" the fuzzy image appeared to raise an eyebrow.

"How many times do I have to tell you to call me Luke?"

Kam held back a small chuckle. "My apologies, _Luke._ May the Force be with you."

"And with you, my friend."

Both men bowed their heads in respect and disengaged their connection. Luke didn't mean to worry, but a small part of him still felt guilty for leaving without much notice and all but dumping his duties upon the other Jedi. None of them seemed to feel burdened by the responsibilities, though. Kam had assured him on several levels that everything was fine. There were no long dead Sith Lords attacking, no Death Stars approaching, not even any bickering initiates who had burned each other with practice sabers. If Luke had known it would be this easy to step down, he would have taken a break a while ago. But even as he considered that thought he knew that he would not have. If he had taken the break at any other time, perhaps the Praxeum would not have been ready. Perhaps he would not have been ready. And with certainty, _Mara_ would not have been ready.

But no, it was senseless thinking in terms of what-if. The Force had guided him to this time and place in his life. He just had to decide what to do with it from this point forward.

Luke stood and pushed away from the comm station, taking his mug of chocolate with him out onto his small balcony. He stood there for several minutes watching the air traffic pass by. The sun was just beginning to tip below the horizon beyond the Manarai Mountains, the bright orange yellow hue giving way to muted purples and red. The same red as Mara's hair. The whole planet teemed with life and Luke closed his eyes, reaching outward and drawing strength from the energy it created. He sighed in contentment as one presence stood out amongst the rest.

Never before did he believe that another being could make him feel so complete. In hindsight a piece of him had always been missing; a hole within his spirit that he had never recognized. Even now after they had parted, Luke could still feel her presence ever so softly in his heart. She wasn't projecting, nor seeking him, but a piece of her remained with him no matter where she was physically. He hoped that she could feel the same from him.

In all of his Jedi studies and training, Luke had never come across anything very relevant to personal Jedi relationships. And that left him wondering if there was a reason. Certainly not all Jedi were celibate, he and his sister were proof enough of that. Not every Jedi initiate could have been a happy mistake. If Force abilities were inherited through the generations then Jedi must have married and had families, he assumed. Luke wondered how many Jedi in the old Jedi Order married other non-Jedi, as Leia and Corran had. Although not a full Jedi yet, Leia seemed to do a wonderful job at having a family and raising Force sensitive children. And Han, the poor dote, had to be a strong man indeed to take it all in stride, constantly being surrounded by politicians, Jedi, and Rogues.

Luke made a mental note to research the matter more. Perhaps he had just bypassed the information before since he had never had a real reason to dwell on the subject. He himself had never discouraged personal relationships amongst his pupils at the academy unless it became a distraction. He felt that when two people cared for each other, they were stronger, not weaker. Palpatine thought that his compassion for his friends would be his undoing. Luke thought it had been his strength and what pushed him forward towards doing the right thing. The people he cared for made him want to be a better man and a nobler Jedi. Would compassion of a more intimate sense be so much different? Would he ever compromise his ideals just because he—

". . . _loved her?"_ he mumbled aloud. Luke gasped and nearly dropped his mug, still managing to spill half of his hot chocolate on the ground in the process.

"Oh stars," he sighed, the reality of the situation hitting him hard for the first time. How had he so recklessly and quickly fallen in love with Mara Jade? Well, if anyone could consider the amount of years they had known each other as 'sudden.'

Panic welled within him. That was it. She would kill him. This time she would completely, utterly, annihilate him at all costs, Dark Side be kesseled. He had gone and fallen in love with one of the most dangerous women in the known galaxy, and she would probably kill him for it.

But what a glorious way to go.

"Aw, sithspit. What have I done?" Luke ran a hand through his hair, drawing in more of that Jedi calm reserve he had stored within. He began to mumble phrases of the Jedi Code under his breath. When he got to 'There is no passion' he trailed off and stopped, looking back out towards the horizon to contemplate the phrase.

"There is no passion," he repeated out loud. "There is serenity." Luke thought long and hard about that one. How could you have one without the other? If you never knew passion, how could you seek solace in serenity? If you never knew passion, how could you even begin to understand and appreciate serenity? Passion and conviction were essential to what made humans, well… human. When passion overtook the other senses and guided one's actions was where the problem lay. Luke had always felt that the decision to act must be made while at peace, and not within a passionate state of mind. Passion itself was not the danger and never had been. It was the reaction to that passion.

And he would be the first to admit he was certainly passionate about Mara Jade.

He loved her, and loved her passionately, in every physical and emotional sense of the word. But she also brought him peace. Reaching out with his senses only confirmed it. As much as his pulse quickened when she touched him, she also brought him back to a state of reality that had long eluded him. Her soul sang to his and he knew instinctively that their lives had been bound to each other from the beginning. But would Mara see it that way?

Luke thought back to the previous evening, or morning rather, when his late night reflections had roused Mara from her sleep. She must have subconsciously picked up on his mental disturbance for there was no other reason for her to wake when she had. Mara was usually a very peaceful sleeper. Something had been tugging at the back of his mind and he had not been able to pinpoint the root of it. Maybe now he understood a little bit more.

Not that any experience with Mara had been superficial but last night had been something altogether different. The way she had made love to him. . . It was just that. It felt as if she had _made love_ to him. Every movement between them had been slow and deliberate, laced with tenderness beyond words. When he looked into her eyes, he could feel their bond almost solidify. With every brush of her hand she showed how much she desired him, cared for him, needed him. Almost enough to let him believe that she could one day possibly love him the way that he now knew he loved her.

Almost.

He thought back to the very first time they had made love to each other. He had promised her that he wasn't looking for a commitment; it was simply _her_ that he needed. Knowing what he knew now, he didn't know if it would still be enough. But this was Mara; she would never be content with his simple life on Yavin IV. It wasn't in her nature to 'live the jungle life' as she had put it.

An insecure brooding in the back of his mind wondered if this had all been a bad idea, a concern he had voiced out loud to Mara from the very beginning. He couldn't bear the thought of losing her now, but it would not be fair of him to ask her to stay either. Mara's life was out there amongst the stars.

But it didn't have to be.

That small glimmer of hope sparked again within him. He wasn't on Yavin IV, and she wasn't aboard the _Wilde Karrde_, or the _Jade's Fire_. They were both here on Coruscant instead. Something had brought them both here and Luke was willing to take bets out against the Hutts that it was for them to finally find each other.

He briefly, but very distinctly, saw a vision of Mother Rell of Dathomir flash through his mind. She thought he had a wife; children. If others had dared to believe it, why shouldn't he?

The sky had turned black and Luke stared out towards the traffic once more. He absently wondered where Mara had gone. She had been rather elusive when she left earlier that afternoon. She had appeared a little distracted, confused even when she left his apartment, not saying where she was going. The untrained eye would have never known the difference, but Luke knew her better than anyone else, possibly even more than Mara herself. He hadn't pried, perhaps a little bit frightened to know the true reason for her disquiet. He let her leave without question, not that she owed him any explanation to begin with.

Somewhere, out there in the city, Mara was probably doing some thinking of her own.

* * *

Luke grunted and parried to the right as Mara's blue blade came crashing down towards him. He twisted to the left, driving her blade out at an awkward angle and forcing her to relent backwards otherwise risk losing her balance. She recovered quickly enough though and steadily forced him backwards towards the wall of the sparring gym space they now occupied. Luke had noticed a growing intensity with Mara's skills in the past two weeks, and a peculiar willingness to absorb new techniques and information. One of the many traits in Mara that he loved so much was her learning ability. She was a quick study when she put her mind to it.

They had been at this particular match for nearly forty minutes and Luke could feel his fatigued muscles begin to quiver under the strain. Judging by the way Mara held her blade, she was also beginning to waiver. It was no wonder. That lightsaber had always been far too bulky for her lithe frame. Anakin Skywalker had crafted it to match his stature and had never intended it to conform to the hands of a, comparatively speaking, much more petite form.

It only took a fraction of a second for Luke to see his opening. Mara was becoming overconfident that she had him so closely backed against a corner and was losing her concentration within the Force. Luke made a strike for the left and when she moved to block him, he made a Force enhanced leap, somersaulting over Mara's head and landing on firm feet directly behind her. He heard her gasp and mutter a curse as he swung a leg underneath her body as it twisted around to meet him. But it was too late. Her knees buckled and she had just enough sense to deactivate her blade before crashing down to the floor in a defeated heap.

Mara laid there panting, looking up towards the vaulted ceiling, but not looking embarrassed in the least. This was the longest she had lasted against the Jedi Master thus far. Yet another learning experience to add to the collection.

"You did well," said Luke after taking a long sip from his canteen. He offered a hand towards Mara to help her up but she waved it off, choosing to remain in her current position.

"Thanks." She exhaled loudly one last time and then closed her eyes, using the Force to draw in some cleansing breaths. A few seconds later her breathing was back to normal.

She called her lightsaber back to herself and clipped it back on her belt as she stood unaided. Luke threw her a towel and she grimaced at the smell permeating her own body.

Luke chuckled. "I don't smell so great either. You give me a good run for my credits, Jade, and not many can."

"Hah!" She wiped the sweat from her brow and guzzled down a much needed drink of water. "I could have done better."

He shrugged. "You've been getting better each day. I wouldn't say you 'could have' done better, but more you 'will do better' the next time."

"True." Mara sighed and began stretching in some cool down exercises.

The past couple of weeks had come as a pleasant surprise to Luke. Mara had wanted to spend a couple of hours each day in the gym honing her lightsaber technique and had proved to be a fast study. There was something very fluid and catlike in her movements and Luke would admit at times he had a difficult time teaching her as he would become distracted by the movement of her body. All those years of dancing had obviously served her well, in more ways than one.

Not only had their sparring sessions become more frequent, but it appeared that Mara was also opening herself up to the Force more in general. Luke felt a shift every time Mara opened her senses but made no mention of it to her. She was reaching for something but he did not know for what. He wasn't sure if Mara knew either. Perhaps it was just her subconscious self reaching out to attain some semblance of serenity, but he could not tell whether the effort was intentional or just that; subconscious. He hadn't dared to ask her yet. Things were pleasant between them the past couple of weeks and he didn't want to ruin it. He was high with hope that she would open up to him soon.

Luke would never give up on the thought that Mara Jade would one day become a true Jedi. She just needed time to overcome some of the mental obstacles that Palpatine still held her captive to. Some of Mara's skills were so fine tuned already that they matched or even surpassed his. In long distance communication and in self preservation she probably had much to teach him, and her self defense and lightsaber skills were a very close match. But in many others, there was still so much he wanted to share with her. If she would only let him.

Seeing the somber look on Luke's face, Mara extended a short tendril of emotion out towards him and she smiled when he eagerly accepted it. She wrapped both her arms around his toned waist. "I don't know about you, but I need a shower."

"Is that an invitation?" he grinned and raised his eyebrows in hopeful anticipation.

"Very funny, but no." Mara jabbed him playfully in the ribs. "I need to go back home and do a few things on my own. You know, finances, cleaning, sending out the laundry. All that stuff I've been neglecting lately."

Luke frowned melodramatically. "You're just upset that I beat you . . . again."

"Nope," she assured him and trying her best to ignore his antagonism. "Anger is of the dark side, remember farmboy? But I'm not sure where teasing or gloating stands."

"Sort of a grey area I suppose." Luke wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close against him. Her eyes shone of an inner peace he wasn't accustomed to seeing from her. "Will you join us tonight for dinner?" he asked as he brushed away a strand of hair that had become disentangled from its restraints. He had invited Han and Leia over to his apartment for dinner, promising marinated nerf steaks and hoped that Mara would also accept the invite.

Mara absently ran her fingers up the back of his shirt. "I suppose I could keep you guessing, but yes, I'll be there."

"You and Leia seem to be getting along well as of late."

She shrugged nonchalantly. "I've always respected Leia but never really saw her socially, or anyone else for that matter. I've never really had friends. But she doesn't judge me and she, just like you, is good at getting me to see things from a different point of view. I don't think I ever really wanted that before. I was content with things the way I saw them and didn't care for anyone else's opinion."

Luke regarded her with an earnest expression. "You've been giving this a lot of thought. And I think you've been meditating more than you've let me on to believe." He smiled and brushed his thumb along her cheek. Her face flushed just slightly in response to his touch, or perhaps to his words. She made no attempt to deny his allegations and he smiled all the more.

"Yes," she said simply. "I've been meditating a lot, about many things." Her eyes were bright and clear but with an edge, as if she were holding something back.

"Good." He nodded just slightly. "I can sense you've been more at peace with yourself. And with me too I might add."

Luke felt her Force sense brush against his mind in the Jedi equivalent of an embrace. "I do feel more serene," she admitted. "But by no means any less passionate." Her eyes darted to his full mouth and could see as well as feel his quickened pulse. "In fact, I think it's more."

"I wouldn't want anything less from you," he admitted honestly. "I don't want you to change who you are, Mara. That's what makes you _you_. At heart I'm still just a desert farmer from an outer rim world. A pilot, a mechanic, impulsive, impatient –"

"And with your heart on your sleeve," Mara finished with a small smile. "I know who you are, _farmboy._ I'm not after the stuffy, placid Jedi Master that the holo press flaunts around. I want that impulsive, _passionate_, pilot, farm boy, every-day Luke Skywalker that has been hiding dormant for far too many years. I think I've found him."

"Mm." Luke sighed and leaned his forehead against hers, closing his eyes and simply enjoying the moment. Never would he have thought that Mara could be so forthcoming with her feelings. He relished in the honesty she bathed him in. Everyone expected so much from him, even his sister at times. But not Mara.

With some effort he broke their physical contact and began collecting his belongings into his carryall. "Dinner is at nineteen hundred," he said casually. "But you know you're welcome at any time."

Mara glanced down at her wrist chrono and bit at her lower lip. "That might give me just enough time to do what I have to and clean up respectably enough for your family."

Luke gave a short chuckle. "It's just dinner with my sister and her husband, Mara. It's not a state of the affairs dinner."

"Hah! Sometimes it feels like the same thing."

"Aw, come now," he smiled encouragingly. "Han and Leia like you. You just admitted that you've been getting along well."

"I suppose so." Mara fastened her bag closed and slung it behind her shoulder. "I'm still not sure how to act with you around them, though. I mean, they know we're involved with each other out of the sheer obviousness of it, but we haven't exactly announced it."

Luke instantly recalled a memory from long ago and thought hesitantly to share it with Mara. "I remember when Han and Leia first started dating, if you could call it that." They began walking in step with each other down the corridor heading towards the turbolift. "When we were all stationed on Hoth together they had this incredible tension between them which I didn't understand at the time, because I didn't want to." He cleared his throat awkwardly. "They had started to feel things for each other that by any social standards they shouldn't have. They were both fighting it, but losing the battle. After Hoth was attacked and evacuated I went off to begin my Jedi training. By the time I got back to them on Bespin, Han was frozen in carbonite and Leia was . . . different. She had changed, and I knew her heart belonged to him, even though she never shared with me the details of it all."

Mara listened in silence, rarely hearing Luke talk about such personal experiences aloud. She had seen into parts of his soul and had seen certain things through his eyes, but it was a sort of sad sentiment to hear the story being told in his own words.

"When I saw the anguish on Leia's face and felt her overwhelming despair, I found myself angry with Han," Luke admitted and glanced at Mara. Her face scrunched just noticeably.

"I didn't know she was my sister but I had strong feelings for her and didn't want to see her get hurt. I considered Han my friend but did have reservations about him becoming romantically involved with Leia. He had more than proved himself trustworthy, saving my butt on more than one occasion, but I also knew that he had other obligations and debts to pay off. A part of me thought that he was just toying with Leia, just another scratch in the proverbial bedpost. Combine that together with a little farm boy jealousy and, well…" he tapered off.

The turbolift doors hissed open and they stepped inside together. Mara chuckled softly in her throat and took his hand in hers. "You were just being protective."

"Yeah," he sighed. "Anyway, I did what any good friend would. I supported Leia, never letting her know my misgivings, and we hatched a plan to get Han back. I knew she was hurting inside but she didn't know how to act around me either. She was afraid to show the depth of her emotions. I think she was afraid to love someone again after losing everything and everyone she had cared for on Alderaan.

"After we got Han back, everything was different. When they were together I could feel their connection to each other. Even though Han isn't Force sensitive they both have such a strong life presence that I could feel what they shared with each other even with my limited training. But they were still a little bit awkward with each other around me and others. And they still bickered half of the time."

Mara tried to hide her grin. She and Luke both knew that their tempers did, and would, get the better of them from time to time. It came with the territory and they were both prepared to deal with it, undoubtedly with some Jedi calming exercises.

"Anyway." Luke smiled softly and brought their intertwined fingers towards his mouth, planting a small kiss across the top of her knuckles. "I think my point is that going from years of being 'just friends' to a romantic couple takes a bit of adjustment. For everyone involved, not just for you and me."

"I suppose you're right." Mara let out a breath she wasn't aware she was holding.

"Just be yourself, Mara. Don't let your defenses get the best of you."

The turbolift stopped on Mara's floor and her piercing gaze bore into his. "I don't have anything to defend," she said resolutely. "I'm done hiding."

Slowly, she backed out of the lift, keeping their fingers intertwined until they were forced to break contact. Her eyes never left his.

_/See you tonight./_

Luke wasn't sure if it has been his thought or hers.

* * *

Several hours later, Mara was showered, dressed, and her life more organized to her liking. Skywalker had been a huge distraction lately and she had let minor things slip through the cracks. Things like clean undergarments.

Mara stood in front of the mirror and placed one last pin in her hair, effectively securing it back in an elegant yet practical chignon. Her eyes naturally fell to the lightsaber dangling on her utility belt. Did Luke know what he had done when he had given her that token all those years ago? He had effectively woven the Skywalker legacy into her life, laying the groundwork for a fate she was helpless to escape, and no longer wanted to. She carried the blade always, and felt an emotional echo every time she touched its metal cylinder. She should have known that night on the rooftop; their fates had been intertwined from the very beginning.

Mara stared into her own eyes as she clasped the last earring into place, absently wondering if she could truly say she was still the same woman she had once been. Luke had said he didn't want her to change who she was, but in some ways, Mara felt she had change irrevocably.

She took in a cleansing breath and squared her shoulders as she left her apartment. Yes, she was done hiding.


	9. Chapter 9

**Open Your Door**

J. Bredin

A/N: Traveling back in time here for a little bit. And just when you thought we were getting somewhere! Be patient, I promise this has purpose. Everything has to build up.

* * *

**Chapter 9**

(Two weeks previously; The Solo apartment)

Leia and Mara emerged from the Solo study with their heads inclined close together, holding a quiet conversation. Han glanced at the chrono and raised his eyebrows slightly. Mara's outward anxiety had calmed down several notches since she had arrived more than an hour ago, and his wife seemed to be rather pleased. With herself or with Mara, he couldn't tell.

Han stared at the pair as Leia and Mara hugged each other and bade farewell. He couldn't overhear what the two women were saying from his viewpoint, but he was trying his damndest. The kid must have done something pretty outlandish to drive Mara Jade over to their apartment. Mara had always run in Luke's direction whenever conflict emerged.

_Unless the conflict was him,_ Han thought with amusement.

"Goodnight, Solo," Mara bowed her head slightly towards Han. "And thank you."

"Sure." He nodded back. "Any time."

Mara disappeared out through the doorway, leaving Han and Leia alone once more. The princess stood in the doorway for a moment longer, smirking in silence to herself.

_Oh, this should be good_, Han thought to himself.

"Well your worshipfulness," Han grinned. "What was _that_ all about?"

"Oh, just girl talk." Leia turned and smiled innocently at her husband. "I think she needed to talk to someone other than Luke for a while." She crossed the room and draped an arm around his waist, enjoying the warmth of his body against hers. It had been many years since their passion was new and fervent, but she loved him more each day. Seeing Luke and Mara so enamored with each other only added fuel to that fire. She was grateful that Luke had found someone to make him feel more alive again, and truth be told, Leia was glad that it was Mara who had been the one to fill that position. No one else would have been able to match him step for step, Callista Ming included.

Leia snapped out of her short reverie and brought her attention back to the matter at hand. "I think she is finally ready to achieve her knighthood," she said matter of factly.

Han whistled softly. "Didn't really see that coming."

She raised her eyebrows at him. "Really. And I thought you had good instincts."

"Hey! I take offense in that." Han gave her his best bruised ego look and she did nothing but smile in response.

"Seriously," she replied, "how could you not see this? Any reason that she has had to defer her training has been completely eradicated. That's why Luke has been on her case recently, and why she has been more temperamental about it than usual. She knew she couldn't deny it any longer, but either pride, or Force knows what else has kept her on the defensive."

"Probably just habit at this point," he muttered.

Leia nodded in agreement. "It's cliché but true; old habits die hard. It's taken a lot for her to even admit to herself that this is her destiny and her birthright. It may be longer still before she can bring herself to admit it to Luke."

"Ah, I see your point." Han slowly stroked her back. "What is she going to do?"

Leia paused, pursing her lips together slightly, taking on a far off look. "I'm not really sure. But the whole time we were talking I could feel this energy slowly building from Mara's Force signature. I think by the time she left, she had an idea of what she was going to do, but she didn't tell me what she was planning. I can tell that she's been thinking about this for a while. I think becoming involved with Luke has just finally made the choice a necessity."

"Yeah," he agreed humbly. "I think getting together is probably the best decision either of them has made in a long while."

Leia snorted softly and smiled. "I think she's in love with him, Han. She didn't say so, but I really think that it's a huge contributing factor in her decision. It's as if she doesn't feel she is good enough for him. If they are ever to have a real future together, she will need to become a Jedi Knight. Not because Luke wants her to, but because it is what she feels she must do. That's why now 'all of a sudden' she feels she has to do this. A part of her has probably always wanted it. Why else would she have spent all that time on and off at the Academy?"

"Jedi," Han muttered gently. "I'll never understand them."

Gently, Leia perched upon her toes to plan a soft kiss across his lips. "I know, sweetheart. But I love you anyway."

"Mm." Han sighed softly and licked his lips, tasting the sweet amber wine fresh on Leia's mouth. "Come on, Princess. Let's go to bed." He smirked and eyed her suggestively, letting one hand fall down and cover her bottom.

Even after all these years Leia still felt a slight blush rise to her cheeks, but maybe it was just the after effects of the wine. Silently, she took his hand and led them both back to their bedroom.

* * *

Mara Jade navigated down the corridors back to her apartment, a myriad of thoughts swarming through her mind in a jumbled collage. She had to make a conscious effort to keep her mental shields up tight, for she was not yet prepared to share her thoughts or plans with a certain Jedi Master.

Her trek was charged with purpose, each step fueling the energy of the plan that was coalescing in her mind's eye. By the time Mara returned to her apartment, she had a loosely formed plan configured. It would take a little bit of time, and a lot of mental effort, but the reward would be worth the price. She only hoped she would be able to pull it off without giving herself away before she was ready.

After a quick glance at the chrono Mara decided to postpone the transmission she needed to make until the morning. For tonight, she would simply meditate on matters. With a clearer mind, she knew she would gain more perspective, something Luke was always encouraging her to do. Encouraging, she realized, not nagging as she had always viewed it.

A corner of Mara's mouth tightened. If she had mistaken Luke's encouragement for nagging, what else could she have been wrong about? For years now Luke had been trying to teach her that things could always be viewed from different perspectives, that there were many different truths for every reality. Everything could be different, from a certain point of view. Her life could be different, very different, if she simply shifted her paradigm.

Almost on instinct she sent out a gentle Force probe towards Luke's presence and smiled when she felt him respond in kind. She felt his concern over her abrupt departure earlier that day and sent reassurance his way without words. She felt the relief he tried to hide wash over her. This would be a difficult few weeks of trying to keep her plans secret with the way their two minds were already connected.

Mara's comm station chimed and she blinked back to her present location, losing concentration on her link with Luke. Once she sat down and flipped the switch to receive the transmission she smiled broadly. Luke Skywalker's face filled her viewing screen.

"Hi, beautiful," he said sweetly.

"Hi, yourself. What are you doing?"

"I just wanted to talk to you. Someone once told me I was using the Force too much unnecessarily."

"Ha ha," she exaggerated the words. "I don't think that's quite what I was referring to."

Luke shrugged. "What are you doing tonight?" The fact that he did not ask where she had been did not escape Mara's attention. And that made her love him even more. He was undoubtedly curious but he wouldn't pry into her business until she brought up the conversation. She hated to starve his curiosity but she wasn't prepared to tell him where she had been or what she had been thinking.

"I was just about to turn in for the night," she responded honestly. "It's late, and I didn't get much sleep last night."

"Sorry about that," he replied with a sheepish grin.

"Nothing to be sorry for." Mara smirked. "Hey," she began again, quickly changing subjects. "I was thinking. Would you like to do some lightsaber sparring with me tomorrow? My last few sessions with you didn't go so well and I think I'm quite out of practice."

Luke didn't hide his enthusiasm. "Of course. I would love to."

"Great. I'll comm you in the morning then and we'll figure it out."

"Okay. Goodnight, Mara."

"Goodnight, Luke." Mara wrapped her Force sense around his once more before disengaging the comm. She held mental contact for a few minutes longer and then slowly withdrew, leaving them both in a quiet peace.

Mara would spend this night alone meditating on personal matters.

* * *

(The _Wild Karrde_)

"Boss, there is an incoming transmission for you in your quarters," Dankin's voice informed Talon Karrde from behind. "It's Mara Jade."

"Thank you," Karrde replied evenly. "Let Mara know I will be with her momentarily."

"Yes, sir." Dankin gave a short nod and headed back down the corridor he had emerged from.

Karrde pursed his lips into a thin line. Why would Mara be comming him? The last time he had tried to make contact with her she had seemed rather annoyed with him. And a little flustered, he thought with amusement. He had only contacted her to gauge her frame of mind, and had discovered far more than he had intended to. In a way, he was happy for Mara, if what he had seen was a true indication of the status of her relationship with Skywalker. Rumors had been flying for years about the nature of the Jade-Skywalker relationship, but it had all just been speculation. Karrde had always thought that despite what Mara may believe, it was not in her nature to be solitary. He had seen her alone and forlorn for far too many years and it had begun to eat away at her. The irony that it was Skywalker who was now keeping her company was not lost upon him.

With a short sigh, he deactivated the datapad he was reading and made his way to his personal comm station upon the _Wild Karrde_.

"Mara. What a lovely surprise." He gave a polite smile.

"Good afternoon, Karrde. I trust all is well?"

The corners of his mouth twisted just slightly. "I can't complain." He took a short moment to examine the contour of Mara's facial features. The hardness that he had grown accustomed to seeing on the young woman had subsided substantially. Her eyes were softer and she seemed to exude an aura of peace, even from parsecs away. Whatever she was searching for on her leave of absence, to Karrde, it seemed as though she had found.

Karrde cleared his throat quietly. "But I take it you didn't just comm to chat?"

Mara shifted awkwardly in her seat. "No, I was hoping you were still running along the Hydian Way, or at least in the vicinity."

"Ah," he responded lightly. "I don't suppose you have changed your mind and you would like to rendezvous with me out here?"

Something flashed in Mara's eyes but Karrde couldn't quite place the emotion. "No, sorry," she replied with a touch of sadness in her voice. She paused for a long moment before continuing on with the purpose of her transmission. "Talon, I need a favor."

Karrde made no effort to hide his skeptical curiosity by furrowing his eyebrows. Rarely did Mara address him by his first name, and even more rarely did she ask for 'favors.' Mara was the epitome of self reliant. "Of course, Mara. What can I do for you?"

"I need you to find something for me and I know I can trust you to keep quiet about it."

Karrde listed to her request intently as Mara went on to explain what she was looking for, keeping his expression even, despite his surprise. This was no rash decision on Mara's part. She had obviously been thinking about this for some time and showed no hesitation in her request.

"I would pay you, obviously, whatever credits you would usually charge. I'm not looking for a handout."

To that, Karrde smiled. "It's not about the credits, Mara, my dear. That is of little concern to me. What does concern me," he gave her a pointed look, "is what else this is going to cost me. This is pretty serious." He paused and stroked his trimmed beard. "Are you sure about this?"

Slowly, Mara nodded. "I know, after all the fight I put up over the years that it sounds hypocritical, but I just know that I have to do this." Mara sat back in her chair with the palms spread outwards. "I could do it on my own, of course, but I thought since you're out that way anyway, you could save me the trip. Or a lot of work."

"I see." Karrde paused, as if he were considering denying her request. He looked her straight in the eye, challenging her to avert her gaze. But this was Mara Jade, and of course she did no such thing. Mara backed down from no challenge and she was going about proving that very fact right now.

"It just so happens," he continued, "that I am passing by Dantooine within the couple of days. I do believe I can find what you are looking for there. And I would be honored to bring it to you personally."

Mara visibly swallowed. "Thank you, Talon. I really appreciate it. But please," she added. "Do not tell anyone what I've asked of you. I haven't mentioned this to anyone except you." She paused for effect. "Including Luke."

Ah, so it was Luke, now was it? No more _Skywalker_. Perhaps he was correct after all.

"I understand." Karrde bowed his head. "I have other business on Dantooine anyway. I will not mention the side trip to anyone."

"Thank you," she said sincerely.

"It will be my pleasure." He cleared his throat and continued in a more businesslike manner. "I'm sure I can cut my trip through this sector short by a few days, so I would imagine you could see me in about ten days or so. I will contact you to let you know what I've found."

Mara sighed in relief and smiled ever so slightly. "Thanks again." She paused and thought carefully before speaking her next words. "I didn't mean for things to end up this way, you know. Everything just sort of . . . happened."

"The best surprises in life, Mara, are just that; surprises."

"Yes," she smiled. "I suppose they are."

Karrde silently fought an internal struggle. He knew by procuring what Mara requested he would be aiding her in her inevitable resignation from her current position with his organization. Truth be told, he probably knew that months ago when he began to see hints of Mara's unrest on his ship. And he certainly knew it when he had agreed to let her leave for Coruscant. He just didn't think it would happen so soon after her leaving.

In a rare, carefully shielded emotional voice he told her, "May the Force be with you, Mara."

Mara nodded in understanding. "And with you."

With that, the screen went black once more.

Karrde sat there for several moments, absently stroking his beard in quiet reflection. Mara Jade was his best associate, of that there was no doubt, and he would be saddened on more than one level to see her leave. But even he could not argue with the prompting of a higher power. He had known for many years now, ever since he had learned of Mara's Force abilities, that she would one day leave his organization. He just never thought that he would be the one to hand her that freedom, delivering it straight into her hands in a leather satchel.

He smiled ruefully.

Karrde leaned forward in his seat and pressed the intercom switch. "Dankin," he called.

"Yes, boss," the younger man replied.

"I think we're just about done out here. Set course for the next stop on our route; let's do some trading on Dantooine."

"Sure thing. I'll punch in the coordinates now."

Karrde sat back, disengaging the comm. "Force help me," he muttered under his breath. _And the rest of the galaxy, too_, he thought silently with amusement.

* * *

Several days later Mara sat in her apartment, nursing a sore knee. Apparently, she was even more out of shape than she had initially thought. It had been many long months, maybe even years, since she had trained physically on a regular basis. Her lightsaber skills were good, but nowhere near Luke's expertise. And he certainly was not going easy on her, which she duly appreciated.

Mara stood and winced slightly as she placed her full weight upon her leg. On second thought, maybe she should ask him to go a little bit easier. It was nothing a warm soak couldn't help but Mara chastised herself for the injury in the first place. She had landed improperly after dodging a strike against Luke in their lightsaber battle earlier in the day and was now paying for her rookie mistake. Her split concentration skills were also something that she would need to work on.

And perhaps self-healing.

A soft chime echoed from across the room and Mara noticed a small indicator light flashing at her comm station. None too gracefully she crossed the room and flipped the switch, reading the data transmission that popped up.

_ Mara,_

_ I found what you are looking for, and what a stunning exemplar of beauty it is, if I do say so myself. I will meet  
you on Coruscant in five standard days. Talk more then. _

_ ~T.K. _

Mara read the message and repressed a smile. Simple and to the point. Just like Karrde.

Slowly, her fingers trailed across her desk towards the drawer that had begun housing several small mechanical components. Mara opened the drawer and wasn't sure whether she felt like smiling or grimacing. Finding all of the necessary pieces had been challenging, if not damn near impossible, especially since she was attempting to hide her actions from Luke. Thus far, she didn't think she had roused any suspicion.

Five days. Then she would have everything. Then the difficult part would begin.

Mara doubted she would find the information she needed in the archival records. Palpatine would have surely destroyed anything of relevancy. And she couldn't go asking Luke for his input. So that left Mara with one choice - some very heavy meditation. With whatever information she could recall from memory, and with the guidance of the Force, she had no doubts that she would be able to accomplish her goal.

Five days. To meditate, to practice—

_And to heal,_ she thought with a grumble.

Mara hobbled off to the 'fresher to take a much deserved shower. With a wave of her hand she used the Force to close the drawer of trinkets behind her.


End file.
